Supernatural fanfic 5/3/17 - 1/2/18

Fight On

Characters: Jared's sister!reader, Jared. (Jensen for like a half sentence)

Words: 780

Warnings: slightly angsty, fairly fluffy. Suicide attempt and depression. Mention of death.

A/N: I know that many of you struggle with depression. If you need an ear just message me or send an ask. I'm always happy to talk.

***

You tugged the edge of your shirt nervously watching Jared as he talked with the young fan. You remembered the day six months ago that had led you to where you were.

"Y/n."

You looked up from your laptop. "In my room!" you called.

Jared walked in his face shocked and sad.

"Jared what is it what's wrong?"

"Y/n. I'm so sorry." his voice cracked.

"What is it Jared?" you asked your voice trembling.

"y/n it's Liv. She-she..." Tears spilled from his eyes. "She's dead y/n. They couldn't save her."

A tear trickled down your cheek as your remember how you had cried together late into the night. After that day you had slid downhill, depression making you feel everything and nothing at all.

"y/n dinner." Jared knocked on your door.

"I'm not hungry." you said not looking up.

"y/n you need to eat." Jared begged. "You didn't eat yesterday. Please come eat."

"I said I'm not hungry Jared!" you yelled throwing your pillow at the door.

Jared blinked at your outburst then turned and left.

You watched the girl sit, the next fan stepping up to ask a question.

"I'm worried about her Jen. I don't know how to help her." You stopped one the last step listening.

"She hasn't eaten for days, she barely leaves the house anymore. I don't know what to do." Jared's voice cracked. You heard small scuffling noises and peaked around the corner. Jared was hugging Jensen like his life depended on it.

Fast forward to a week later and you were falling fast.

You lay in bed staring up at the dark ceiling. What was the point of living?

You rubbed the raw scars on your wrist wishing you could just... not be there. What was the point anyway. You slid quietly of your bed grabbing your journal. You padded across the room silently closing the door and turning on the light. Opening your journal to a blank page you began to write.

Five minutes later you set down your pencil. Quietly you made your bed setting your journal open on the sheets.

Turning out your light you slipped out into the hall. Tiptoeing past Jared's room you paused. How will he feel when he finds me?

Pushing the thought away you walked on, silent as a shadow.

You were jerked from your thoughts when you heard your name. Turning you saw a fan sitting next to you giving you a thumbs up. You grinned putting a finger over your lips.

Turning back to the stage you watched Jared.

"y/n?" Jared rubbed his eyes. "What're you- y/n!"

You spun around the open bottle in your hand.

"y/n please don't do this." he begged. "There's another way."

You shook your head. "Jared I can't do this anymore." you whispered.

"y/n I can help you." Jared's eyes were pleading, begging you to let him help.

"It's too late." you pressed the empty bottle into his hand. "I'm sorry Jared."

The next fan stepped forward asking her question. You stepped forward in line.

"Well this is it then. You've come a long way y/n." Your therapist smiled at you. "You're ready to go home now."

You hugged him. "Thank you. You've helped me so much. I couldn't have done it without you."

"You're welcome y/n." he hugged you back. "And remember if you ever need to talk-"

"You're just a phone call away." you grinned. "I remember."

"Remember to open up to your brother as well. He cares about you." he reminded you.

The fan in front of you stepped up to the mic.

"Hi."

"Hi!" Jared grinned at the fan.

"My question is about your sister." Jared's smile faded a little. "I heard she attempted suicide six months ago. Have you been able to see her since she went into rehabilitation?"

"I saw her three months ago but I haven't been able to see her since then because of filming." Jared said his smile sad. You pulled your AKF beanie lower on your head. Stepping up to the mic you heard the audience around you murmur passing your name to the people next to them.

"Hello Jared." you smiled.

Jared stared at you his eyes wide. "y/n." he breathed. Then he was jumping from the stage and pulling you into his arms. You wrapped your arms around him holding him as he shook with sobs.

"I'm sorry Jar." You whispered. "I should have asked for help sooner."

"Asking for help is hard y/n. I'm so proud that you let other help you. It takes a lot of courage to do that."