Save Me ; Yoonmin ✅

24

(((((TRIGGER WARNING))))) 

((Jimin's pov))

I sat on the bathroom floor at night. As I took a quick glance at the digital clock placed near the sink, I saw it was around three at night.

I sighed. We had our first concert again after... all this. It was nice to be doing our thing again, singing and dancing, entertaining. It made me feel normal again. But something was off at the same time.

I felt watched. Which is kind of normal, I mean you're being watched by thousands of fans. More like judged. As if they all knew what happened and were judging me for it.

I felt worse every day, but I didn't tell anyone. It felt easier to keep quiet. I don't want to be a burden once again. It was easier to just sit here and suffer on my own, than to drag down everyone else and cause the others to be unhappy.

I took a deep breath and let my fingers slowly trace all the older and fresh self-harm scars.

I didn't mean to do it.

It just happened.

And I wanted to do it more.

The second I took a hold on the razor blade my tears spilled, and I did it. And did it more.

After a while I slipped. I accidentally hit my arm with the razor and made a deep cut. I let out a pained groan and stopped moving. Still having the blade in my hand but I stopped. I felt dizzy and leaned against the wall. I didn't know if it was caused by the crying or the cutting. I heard knocks on the door.

"Chim, you okay?" I heard Yoongi's raspy voice say from the other side. I wanted to answer that I was okay, but I couldn't bring myself. My voice wouldn't obey my thoughts. I couldn't do much and started panicking, making my breathing quickly and unstable. I heard him knock once more and waiting a few seconds before opening the door.

I was too dizzy to really focus on anything happening at all but guessing on Yoongi's reaction my state wasn't too good.

"Shit... Fuck, Jimin? Jimin baby?" He asked panicking. I could hear by the tone of his voice that he was crying. I still couldn't respond, I could only panic.

"Fuck..." He whispered, and I heard him doing something on his phone. I felt his hand touching mine.

"Babe, please let go of the blade. Can you let go of it for me?" I dropped it subconsciously and saw Yoongi quickly grab it away.

"Seokjin, please come here... please." It hurt me hearing him panic like this, especially knowing I caused it. Not long after I heard footsteps and voices.

"Yoongi? What's up? Where are you?" I heard vaguely.

"Here" he responded a little louder, struggling for breaths through his crying. "Baby can you hear me?" He continued as he caressed my cheek. I felt an impact on the side of my head as my head fell sideways at the touch as I didn't seem to be in control of my body anymore.

"Oh my god." I heard a panicked Seokjin say. "We need to get him to a hospital."

Jin lifted me up with no trouble as he made his way out of the hotel.

"Yoong, wake the rest up and get to the cars." He said, and I heard a sound of approval come from Yoongi.

Suddenly it felt like I was hit with reality at the same time the cold night air hit me. My arms hurt, my throat was dry, my head pounding. I panicked, was I going to die?

"Hyung..." was the only thing I could choke out.

"It's going to be okay Jiminie, I won't let you go okay?" Seokjin spoke as I let out a pained cry. He sat down in the backseat of one of the cars we use after opening it, holding me close.

"I know it hurts, but it will be okay, I promise." He said. Despite it being while crying and sounding panicked, it calmed me a bit and I hid my face in his shoulder.

"Hobi can you drive? Please?" He said, holding onto me tight. Afraid that if he would let me go, he would lose me. I heard the car start and the whole ride I lost and gained consciousness, before completely passing out right before I entered the hospital.

***

I'm sorry my children

Xx A