Shielded Arrow (Oliver and Felicity -Olicity- Fanfiction) ~2nd book in the Saga~

Chapter 4

"Hey, girlie! You didn't give me a call like you usually do, so I thought I'd call you for once!" Carly's warm voice muttered through the computer, as Felicity continued to type.

"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry, been distracted lately." Felicity throws a glance over at John who was sitting on her bed in the one room clocktower. "Ever since I've gotten into town things have been a little bit of a rush..."

Trying to find my long lost true love is a bit of a hassle, she didn't add.

"Well, since you're back in town, do you want to get together?" Carly's voice sounded hopeful and friendly.

Felicity shook her head, "No sorry Carly, I can't right now, things are just too hectic and I need to get a good grip on them... I think I'll be staying a little longer, so we have more time."

Carly seemed a little disappointed, but she accepted it like a good friend. "No problem, chicka! Just give me a call!"

"Will do, Carly, see you around," Felicity hit the screen ending the call and she didn't look back at Diggle to see his facial expression.

"Felicity, I love you, but you need to leave Oliver alone if you're not going to stay in his life."

"I know!" Felicity's head fell into her hands. "I know, John, I do... I know, alright!? But, here's the thing, I have been flying back for months and he hasn't known about it. I have kept track of everything in his life, I know that he is going bankrupt, and I have been transferring money into his family's' account day and night when I can afford it, just like yours, I've been talking to Thea and trying to convince her that being Merlin's daughter isn't the end of the world. She's coming to terms with it since Oliver finally told her! I know that when I left, he didn't shed a tear! Okay? I know that I haven't been by his side, but I haven't exactly left, alright?" she was out of breath by the time she finished her sentence but she kept going.

"I'm trying here, I said I would help with the Arrow stuff and I'm keeping my word, John, I am! I know that Oliver doesn't like Amanda so in my debt I am working for her so she can take over for me only when I'm not here! I am juggling three jobs and my life, and my family, and it's hard since I've never been good at juggling! Alright? I know that I shouldn't be in his life only when someone dies, but..."

Felicity was gasping for breath and feeling like she wasted it all she turned back to the computers to do what she does best.

"'But' you love him," Diggle finished for her. "It's not a bad thing to say, Felicity, it's alright to admit it."

"It is a horrible thing to love him," she whispered. "Loving him is like waiting for water in a drought. Useless and disappointing," the words tasted like chalk in her mouth, but it was true. Oliver could be so cold, and harsh sometimes. Yes, she loved him, yes, she missed him!

But it was time to miss and move on...

"I don't know what I should do, at first i thought it was a good idea to stay away, but none of this ever would have happened if it wasn't for me and my jealous girly side."

"You? Jealous?" John laughed sarcastically. "Felicity he has hurt so many women, I understand why you went running for the hills, but... You're wrong. Just because the camera's you placed in the house didn't catch him crying, doesn't mean that he wasn't. You two are a lot alike you know."

"What?" Felicity turned to face John. "How?"

"You're both stubborn, and caring and selfless. You both have a good sense of justice, and you both make each other better. You don't see it, but I do and I see how he did cry over you, how he did go all, 'I'm gonna kill every last jailer or else...' 'Im going to do what Felicity would want me to do...' this endless cycle of kill and heal, Felicity it was horrible!"

Felicity shook her head, "And, uh, how long did this go on for?"

"The crying?" John informed her, "It's still going on."

Felicity rolled her eyes, not believing him for a second. "I can take the truth, John..."

"You know he doesn't cry tears like you, Felicity, but he cries on the inside. I've seen him get teary when we drive past your apartment, and how-"

Natasha walks back in from calling Sara outside. "I just walked into a thing didn't I?" She guessed feeling a little guilty.

"No, Natasha, it's fine, you're fine... John, I haven't really properly introduced you to Natasha Romanoff, a partner of mine - we work together."

Natasha stuck out her hand for John to shake which he did eagerly. "Nice to meet you, Natasha... What's do you do when you work with Felicity?"

"I'm actually her trainer," Natasha smiled with pride at Felicity. "She's getting quite good at it, I don't know why she never took self defense earlier."

Diggle looked over at Felicity with a confused expression, "You're taking self defense? Why?"

Felicity shrugged, "When I moved to New York, I had the chance to be a different person, and I went for it. That, and it was apart of the agreement with S.H.I.E.L.D..."

Natasha looked a little surprised to see Felicity tell a secret like that, and she crossed her arms expecting more from her student.

"Oh, sorry, John is apart of the Arrow's team. I told them why I was leaving, and they accepted it," Felicity explained and Natahsa seemed to relax the slightest.

"You told them Green Arrow's identity?" Diggle was appalled and Natasha was quick to assure him.

"We don't know anything about this Green Arrow. Well, we know that Felicity flies back here to help him, and we have our theories that it is Oliver Queen, but she hasn't confirmed anything...." Natasha smiled and Felicity's mouth fell open. "Felicity you aren't the best liar in the world, sorry to tell you..."

Felicity nodded, understanding.

"It's kind of hard keeping so many secrets when I try and hold up the truth above anything else," Felicity muttered.

"I'm going to see Sara," Natasha walked over and looked at her friend. "Felicity are you sure that you won't mind us staying in your old apartment?"

"As sure that Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes, yeah," Felicity smiled at Natasha. "Now, will you get out of here?!"

Natasha nodded and ran down the stairs of the clock tower.

"Do you really think I shouldn't be there for Oliver?"

"I know you said those same exact words not so long ago, Felicity," John smiled, "but I've always thought you two were good together. And I think if you'll just jump in and out of his life, then no, you shouldn't be there for him."

Felicity nodded, "Yeah, you're right... You're right..."

Reason came to her and she couldn't help the pang in her chest that she felt at his answer. She knew it was the right thing to do, but she still wanted to see him. Feel his smooth skin on hers again.

But that would never happen.