Is he really a bad boy? [English]

~Chapter 78 also known as the end~

TWO WEEKS LATER

All the clothes were packed. All important things were already on the way in a truck. All papers were ready in my pocket. So everything was ready for the move. But there was something else I had to do.
"Frank?", I said through my phone. "Miss Veronica.", answered my personal bodyguard Frank, I had to get used to the name first of all, "What can I do for you?"
"Could you drive me to a place?", I asked him.
"Of course, Miss Veronica. I'll be with you immediately."
"Thank you.", I hung up. From now on I wasn't allowed to take another step alone without Frank. The only exception was when I was alone at home, Frank didn't have to be here - yet he was always around, just a few minutes away - or when I was with my father or with Maxim. And now I was glad that Maxim wasn't here. He was at home and spent the day with Taylor, Martin, and Sophie. He had spent the last two weeks with me in the hospital and after I was discharged we had some paperwork to do. That's why he took the last day to spend with his family. My father was working and I said goodbye to Mia and Jake three days ago. Both had flown to Australia. A holiday together. Meanwhile, I was of the firm conviction that both of them had something going on. Although the three of us had previously dreamed of flying to Australia together, the fact that they had now flown there in just two of them was a surprise. But to be honest I had no problem with that, not that I had anything to say, but they had my blessing in any case. Maybe they were meant for each other. Who knows?
Frank, who came through the front door - he had a key, but always knocked before entering the house - brought me out of my thoughts.
"Miss Veronica.", Frank greeted me and nodded at me.
"Hey!", I replied.
"Where is the journey going?", he asked me.
"Before I tell you, you have to promise me something," he looked at me skeptically and I went on since he didn't say anything about it yet, "you're working for me, aren't you?"
"I work for your father."
"My father hired you but actually you are my bodyguard or not?"
"What are you getting at?" He became suspicious, I could see that.
"You must promise me not to tell anyone where we are going. Neither Maxim nor my father should know."
"That does not sound good. What are you going to do?"
"You must promise me beforehand not to tell anyone, Frank. I beg you!" His skeptical look turned into doubt. It took him a few moments to ask again what I was up to.
"Do you promise me that you won't tell anyone where we are going?", I asked him one last time.
"I won't tell anyone."

Frank and I arrived at our destination about an hour later. I sat on the back seat and looked into his eyes through the rearview mirror.
"Are you sure you want to do this? I don't think it's a good idea."
"I have to do it. I can't move to New York without finishing it first."
"I don't think your father or Max would be thrilled if they knew.", he told me. Of course, I was aware that my dad and Maxim would freak out if they knew that I was standing in front of the prison and just before I was going to visit my kidnapper - also known as my ex-boyfriend. My father would most likely quit Frank on the spot, after all, he was supposed to take care of me and not help me execute such stupid ideas. And Maxim, Maxim would probably just be disappointed in me. Maybe he would understand if I explained to him why I had to do this. At some point, I finally scratched my courage together, opened the car door and got out. Frank followed me silently into the building. It took a while until Frank and I were finally led into the visitor's room. The whole querying and scanning, lasted really long.
"I'm waiting outside.", Frank said as we stood in front of the door.
"Thank you.", I replied and he nodded at me confidently. I sat down on the chair, in front of the iron table. The room consisted only of dirty, bare, grey walls, a table, and two metal chairs. It looked just like all the movies and series. Just as I had imagined. Only I thought I was a little more relaxed. But the lump in my throat doubled every minute, just as my hands got wetter and wetter. My heart was beating at irregular intervals and I started to question my decision. Maybe it hadn't been a good idea to come here after all. The door was opened and James was handcuffed into the room by a policeman. He wore an orange jumpsuit and was clearly surprised to see me. He sat down and the policeman removed his handcuffs. He told me we had exactly 30 minutes before he finally left the room.
"Ronnie," he replied with longing in his voice as he rubbed his wrists, which were sore from the handcuffs. "You can't imagine how happy I am to see you."
"I'll move away.", I told him, interrupting his sentimentalism.
"Out of Miami?", he asked in surprise.
"Yes."
"Together with him?" I didn't miss the jealous undertone.
"Yes"
"I'm happy for you!"
"Thank you.", I replied, knowing that he was serious.
"Is that the reason why you came here?", he asked me.
"No", I said, "that was not the reason." I looked at him. He seemed much more insecure and not so self-confident compared to the last time. His beard had become longer, his shoulders also seemed wider. Which was quite surprising, as it was only a month ago that we had seen each other last.
"I can't start a new beginning if I haven't finished with the past before. That's why I'm here, so I can finish up with everything. I want you to answer every question I ask you honestly. Okay?"
"Okay," he replied without hesitation.
"I know immediately if you lie to me!", I said with a threatening voice.
"Ronnie, I have nothing more to lose.", he replied. I would have expected despair in his voice, but there was nothing to hear about it. It sounded more like he had come to terms with his fate. "I will answer everything honestly, I promise!" At that moment I felt really sorry for him. He had a great future ahead of him; his parents were both from very wealthy families who had started big businesses. He had very good grades at school and could have started in one of the companies immediately. Unfortunately, he had taken all this away through his actions and behavior. He had very dark sides to him, but is he really a bad boy?
"Did you plan my abduction from the beginning?", I asked him and decided to react as neutrally as possible, no matter what his answers might be.
"I started planning it after my release."
"What was the gun for?"
"To scare you."
"Were you planning to hurt me?"
"Never!"
"Would you have let me go if Maxim hadn't come?"
"Yes."
"Were you going to shoot me?"
"No. It was an accident."
"Where did the second shot go?", I asked.
"I wanted to hit Maxim, but the shot missed." He aimed at Maxim...Before I could go on, I had to get my normal breathing rhythm in line. I didn't know what I would have done to him if he had shot Maxim. Probably I wouldn't sit here anymore but strangle him already.
"Are you glad you missed him?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"You would never have forgiven me. If I had hit him or even killed him, you would never forgive me. I mean I shot you and put your life in danger and you're not angry about it, but when you found out that I wanted to hit him, you were ready to jump me.", at first, I pretended I didn't know what he meant, but then he went on: "Your eyes widened and I noticed this twitching of your chest. But you held yourself back because you know you'd regret it if you would have freaked out." He was right about everything he had just said. He knew me as well as I knew him, probably he knew me even better.
"Did you know when you met him at the bar that it was Maxim?"
"Yes."
"Did you provoke him on purpose? Because you knew we were together?"
"Yes."
"Were you out on my balcony when Maxim and I were there?" I remembered the feeling of insecurity, the feeling of seeing things that weren't there.
"Yes. I was there. But just the one time.", I didn't know if the thought should calm me down, that I had really seen it and I hadn't just imagined it or if I should feel more uncomfortable now.
"Does he know what was between us?" he asked me.
"Yes. He knows everything you have done to me.", I answered his question.
"How did he react?"
"He wanted to kill you." He laughed.
"Yes, I believe him. I think I would have done it if I had been in his place." I didn't know what to do with that statement, so I didn't react and just continued.
"What is it with the photo wall?" I had no idea it existed at all, but when I was questioned by the officers, they showed me pictures they had taken of the photo wall.
"I don't know.", he replied and I could feel the insecurity, "I was in a prison full of psychos who were doing pretty sick shit. I think I thought it was a good idea at the time to stick photos of you on a wall and plan the kidnapping as if we were in a movie."
"What about the folder?" I didn't even have to mention what folder I meant. He knew immediately what I was talking about. When I saw the pictures in the folder, I had never felt so dirty. All he had done was unforgivable sick shit, but that was even more deviant than all his deeds put together.
"Ronnie..."
"Answer me, James! We hardly have time left and I still have some questions. So, answer me!", I urged him, as I slowly lost my patience.
"All right.", he sighed. "I liked it. I liked seeing you like this, that's why I took the pictures. Ronnie, I also don't know what got into me back then. I can't explain to you why I did all these things. It was as if I had been a different person at that time. I had no control over myself anymore," he tried to reach for my hands lying on the table, but I immediately pulled them to me and didn't give him the chance to touch me, "Ronnie, if I could set everything back, everything I did to you, every single scratch I left you, everything, I would do it right away. Without hesitation." He seemed completely different today. He behaved like when we were still together. He was again the James I had fallen in love with back then. Only there was no love left. At least not from my side. The only thing I felt was pity. I felt sorry for him what he had done with his life. "Sometimes it feels like I'm a guest in my own head. As if someone else had taken control. You know what I am like, you know me better than any other person. You know how I really am, Ronnie!" he crossed his arms on the table and looked me in the eye. "All those terrible things I did to you, it wasn't me. I, my true self, would never have done this to you. You remember what we used to be like, don't you?" And the only thing I could do was nod. Of course I still knew what we were like then. We had been happy. Young and naive. Green behind the ears. It was all perfect. Up to the time when these attacks started with him.
"I didn't let anyone touch me for a whole year.", I told him. "After you did this to me. After you raped me, I couldn't stand touching, no closeness. I had the feeling that your hands were always on my body." It looked for a moment like he had tears in his eyes, but I didn't feel like talking about our relationship that was long gone. I wanted him to understand what he had done to me.
"You've taken everything from me, my pride, my honor, my body. Everything.", it hurt me in my soul to talk about it and to experience all the feelings and sorrows again.
"It was so embarrassing for me, I felt so humiliated afterward. I had the impression that I was worthless. As if I had deserved nothing better. Then I had convinced myself that I deserved to be raped. If I had not deserved it, then it would not have happened to me. Right?"
"No!", he replied although the question was not really a question. So I ignored him and went on. "I wanted no one to know because I was embarrassed that I was with someone who could do something like this to me, did it. I did not tell anyone that you raped me. Only Mia."
"And him. You also told Maxim.", he interjected. There was a strange tone in his voice. As if he was hurt. But not only because of what he did to me, but also because I told Maxim. Or maybe just because Maxim was in my life. And he no longer was.
"Why did you tell him?", he asked me. "Why him?"
"Because he gave me the feeling that I was worth something. I meant something to him. I still do. He was the first one I could trust, he was the first one I wasn't afraid of. That's why I told him because I would trust him with my life if I had to.", I answered his question, "I've even done it already. He saved my life several times." I wanted to see him suffer. I wanted him to feel the same as I did then. I wanted to hurt him as he hurt me. "Once even in front of you."