Love is not always Sweet

chapter 9

Khushi was still processing her thoughts when Arnav spoke again...

Arnav: I am okay with any punishment that you wish to give me, Khushi... I will wait my entire life for your forgiveness... I could still try to digest this truth that you are going to stay away from me but I couldn't live if you quit from my life, Khushi... I don't know when I got used to your presence, this much... Though our marriage was only a nightmare to you, it was the thing which made us stay together... I got more bonded to you unknowingly... I don't know how I wished to step you out of my life after our contract period... Now, I realize... I couldn't stay without seeing you... You became my habit, Khushi... (he gulped before continuing) You now wish to go to Lucknow... and accepting this truth has become the biggest punishment at this moment... Nothing more could have punished me or pained me like this...

Khushi couldn't take anymore... His words are making her fall weak which she doesn't want to happen... She has to fight for herself now... She has to win that respect which he failed to give her...

Khushi: stop it, Arnavji...

It makes Arnav look into her eyes which already held so much pain...

Khushi: If you continue this, I might fall weak and forgive you... (turning her gaze from the floor to meet his eyes) which I don't want to happen knowing what you have done with me... So, please... Let us stop this discussion here...

Arnav stares into her eyes for few seconds... He knew, she doesn't want to forgive him... but it's hurting like hell to hear these same words from her again and again... He composed himself and nodded...

Arnav: fine... but promise me one thing Khushi...

Khushi keeps looking at him so that he could go ahead...

Arnav: Promise me that you won't quit from my life... We might stay close or far apart... It's okay... but I want you to stay in my life... I want to keep our marriage intact... I don't want to break it anytime in future... You could stay anywhere you want... far away from me... I will take it as my punishment... but I want you as my wife forever...

Khushi was surprised to hear that... Now, he wanted to make her stay in his life?? It pained her like hell to hear those words... How could he ask her something like that after knowing which type of marriage they had gone through...?Their marriage included only pain and blackmailing... no centiments... no elders blessings... no love... Khushi remembered how her life turned since the time they got married... Arnav always had hurt her through his words... through his actions... and what was all that for?? Only because he assumed that she had an affair with Shyam...?

Arnav: I won't complain after that...

Khushi: I know, you won't have any complains, Arnavji... but I don't want to promise something which I am not sure about...

Arnav looks at Khushi in horror while Khushi continues...

Khushi: I know, whatever happened in your past was so painful to be digested... I know you went through a lot... and I also know that it pains me to see you in pain... (she looks straight in Arnav's eyes with determination,  before continuing) but that doesn't mean, I am ready to forget everything... I am not any puppet to get played in your hands, Arnavji... What do you think?? Whenever you want me in your life, you could make me stay and whenever someone fills your ears against me, you could play with my life and throw me out?? It won't work in your way always... I didn't yet forget the accusations which you had thrown at me... Who won't have bad past, Arnavji... I too have it... (Khushi became emotional) My parents too died in an accident but that doesn't mean I should stop myself from travelling anywhere fearing I might have to face the same fate as my parents... like the way you stopped believing in marriages seeing your parents broken marriage... What do you think... Marriage is a game?? that whenever you wish, you could play it with me?? There are thousands of people in this world who suffered, Arnavji... who had to go through the pain in their life... Wake up atleast now, Arnavji... You shouldn't lament on your past in such a way that it weakens you so much... Your past has nothing to do with your future... You are a normal human being who have all emotions and who know what is right and what is wrong... take this truth in your head and cut off that attitude of yours which makes you believe that you are a God... I accept, your past is horrible... but that doesn't mean you have all rights to play with my life...