The Abandoned Lovers

-2-

(This chapter contains an episode of self-harm, recommended for mature audiences)

Chapter 2 - Home

For most people home was where they felt safe, they had their parents and siblings by their side. Perfect families. What people thought I had. But they we're so wrong, because home is instead a place I fear. My mother and sister are gone. Everything turned so bad in a matter of months.

After that class was done I wasn't finished with Kingston. We had most of our classes together, plus lunch and free period. Whenever I looked at him he was staring back.

I stand up from my last class, my legs aching from today's earlier encounter with my dad. I walk down the hall, suddenly forgetting about everything in my life except the pain that is soon to come my way. Even if I don't break the rules, there's a daily beating, right?

If I ever broke the rules he made it clear he would beat my within an inch of my life. If I broke a more serious rule he would take me hostage, kidnap me and throw me in a desert or bring me to a slow, agonizing and painful death.

I remind myself of the rules as I put my books in my locker and grab my skateboard.

"Rules: punishable by a beating:
- Hair longer than collarbones
- Not cooking dinner
- Staying out after school
- Wearing any color other than black
- Showing my shoulders
- Showing any of my body's bruises or scars
- Lying
- Friends

Rule: punishable by death:
- telling anybody"

The memory of the reason of all these rules, all of my beatings, floods my thoughts, my head resting in my hands as I lean against my locker.

It's not my sisters fault, it wasn't her. I deserve this. I deserve it.

Suddenly I close my locker slowly, almost numb again from the memory being brought back to my mind. All of the images of that day floating in my brain. The blood, the sound, the screaming.

I speed walk out, nobody noticing me. They never do. I immediately drop my skateboard on the floor and start riding, kicking the floor, not knowing what or how to feel. The pain that would normally flare up in my body is gone.

I don't need those memories back again. I never needed that to happen in the first place. None of this would have happened if it wasn't for me.

I skate down the sidewalk, the air brushing past my face. My hair drifts behind me, not very far since it only reached my shoulders. The feeling isn't new, but it was nice. It always calmed me the best it can.

Nothing really calms me though. The only thing that will calm me at this point is knowing that I could feel something. Maybe, anything. Or somebody loving me, but that's an unimaginable dream.

I stop the skateboard abruptly as I get outside of my house, the scared feeling that would always return when I get there is gone. I walk up to the front door and lean my skateboard against the wall of my front porch, opening the door slowly.

Inside is an empty house with old furniture from when my mom was here, when we were a happy family. "Summer," I hear my dads voice speak out from inside the dark house, in a taunting tone that he uses. Knowing I'm defenseless. This time I'm not scared though.

This numbness overwhelms me so often that I'm almost used to it. I walk into the house, no fear. At this point I've realized that everybody hates me, I have no point of living. Everybody around me leaves. The off-white door closes softly behind me. The air around me is heavy as if preparing me for what's to come. The only thing lighting up the house is a singular candle, casting a yellow tint on the walls the fires sheen hits.