when in rome | ethan

thirty four

"it's like five years ago all over again." mia exclaims, as i shut the car trunk. "helping you pack and all. saying goodbye once more. it's crazy, cass. when you first left, you barely called. i thought i was gonna lose you. it's a relief knowing we're still friends, you know."

my heart warms up, a smile brought to my face. "we've been friends since high school and never had a problem with one another. i promise, if i lost you, i'd go crazy." i explain. "i'll call. all the time."

she smiles, embracing me in a hug. "will you come back any time soon?"

i shook my head. "i don't think so. my manager said it's probably for the best if i stayed in rome. he said traveling to the states, not writing, it's bringing my popularity rate down. no popularity rate, no money."

she nodded her head, understanding. "aren't you loaded right now, though?"

i laughed. "maybe a little." i joked.

a car pulled up to the driveway, and ethan and andi walk out. "i'll go start the car." mia says, leaving me and walking towards the front of the car.

"i just got your text. you're leaving already?" ethan asks, walking up to me.

i nodded, "my manager assured me that it's now or never." i explain. "i'm sorry it's so last minute. i wish i had more time."

without saying anything, he embraces me in a hug. slowly, i hug back tighter. "call us, okay? i'll make sure andi doesn't forget you."

looking up at his eyes, i never want to forget either. coming back home was the best decision i've made in years. the only decision that i've made by myself.

i left to rome five years ago with a full story written, hoping to get it published in europe. and it happened. i wrote it during freshmen year, and have been tweaking it ever since.

want to know what my inspiration was? i'm looking right at him.

i came back to the states, not knowing anything about any of my old friends. i had hoped to find my inspiration again and now i know, i've found it. but not only did i find ethan, but i also found andi.

i kiss him long and hard, afraid this was it. he holds me, as if he never wants to let go.

this pains me. for nine years have i had feelings for him and that just tells me that he's the one. he's the one, and i'm leaving them. selfish.

andi hugs my leg, and i look down at her. "you won't forget me, right?" she asks in a sad voice.

caressing her cheek, i bend down to kiss it. "never. you're my best friend." i guess we were all afraid. afraid of being forgotten.

"i would give you my blankie to remember me by but i can't sleep without it." she says, laughing.

i shake my head, laughing along. "keep it. i'll remember you without it."

facing ethan once more, i explain that i have to leave now and that my flight would depart in a couple hours.

we say goodbye one last time. i was glad i did this time, for i didn't get to last time. but saying goodbye was hard, and i was getting sick of it with every time i had to do it.

pulling out of the driveway, mia and i make our way to the airport. i wave at ethan and andi standing in the lawn of our house one last time. he takes her hand, and leads her up to lisa's house, probably paying a visit to his mom for the time being.

"i saw what happened back there." mia snickered. "you two a thing now?"

i slumped down in my seat, a blush rising to my face. with the tug of a smile on my face, i simply say, "yeah. you could say that."