{4} Hopeful.

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"We have always held to the hope, the belief, the conviction that there is a better life, a better world, beyond the horizon."

~ Franklin D. Roosevelt.

 Roosevelt

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~♡~

"This is a bad idea," spoke Jodie to my left as the RV went over a few bumps. She kept her hazelnut colored eyes on my side view. I ever so slightly tilt my head to meet Jodie's harsh glare. Holding back what looked like tears.

The news about Atlanta affects both of us, but I know deep down Jodie is feeling it ten times worse. Most - if not all - her friends were evacuated to Atlanta days before we left. But I believe what struck her heart cords the most was the news about Anthony. Her long time boyfriend and best friend. I will admit, the kid was there for her when I wasn't.

Work consumed everything. Nothing else mattered. Not after our mom died from cancer, not after dad went bat shit crazy and left us, not during Jodie's first years in college. Work meant everything. Family meant very little.

So the guilt I feel deep down in my soul tugs me in every direction. I don't know how to exactly make this one up.

"How? We are safe. Safer than what we were two hours ago." I say slowly.

Jodie scoffs, rubbing the blank screen of her touch screen phone. "We don't know these people. They just told us that Atlanta isn't safe yet we are heading that way and for what? A slim chance of hope? This Rick could be leading us to our deaths."

"Jodie..." I start, "I'm sorry about Anthony. Really, I am. But this was the best choice for now."

"Oh, yeah. You're so sorry about Anthony. You didn't even like him. Hell, you are probably happy that he is gone now. You didn't even give me a chance to make a choice on joining this group. My words mean nothing to you."

A disbelieving scoff falls from between my lips. Shell shocked by her comments. "You can't be serious? Why would I be pleased about Anthony dying? I might have disliked his lifestyle but I never wanted him dead." My voice shakes as I watch my sister simply throw her hand up at me. Dismissing me entirely.

Like always, Willow Hunter is the one to be blamed. I feel a knot form in the middle of my throat. My vision blurs as I snap my gaze away from her. Every word she said felt like a punch to my gut. The years of sacrificing and weeks of nearly starving myself so she could eat did not seem to mean much to her.

I have always understood why Jodie held grudges against me. I wasn't the sister she needed while growing up. Work kept me sane after mom's passing, but the reality was, I should have stood by Jodie's side. It was not just me who lost a mother and a best friend, she did too. Nonetheless, I shouldn't be blamed for this one.

Jodie holds all of it against me.

It is painful.

"Make sure you are ready, the CDC should be close by now," I mummer, standing up from the hard twin-sized RV bed. Knowing she'd enjoy watching me ball like a child, I leave the small room. Not giving her the satisfaction.

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