Time back when...{BBS}

Chapter 9: It hurts

{This chapter includes sensitive topics self harm, murder and some other fucked up shit}

~Wildcats POV~

"WILDCAT?!" Delirious yelled, he sped over to me "DELIRIOUS THAT'S YOU?!" I put my hands in the air and walked over to him. He picked me up spinning me around both of us so happy to see eachother, When I left the bbs gang delirious was the only one I regretted leaving behind we were always the best of friends. "Delirious I missed you so much" I said joyfully he set me down on my feet, "WHAT I missed you when I heard you left I practically broke down" delirious laughed a bit.
We paused there for a second, I looked at him up and down he had on casual clothes, then I noticed something "AHH DEL NOO" I yelled out I threw my hands on his face covering his vision "What are you doing" Delirious asks grabbing my arms "I can see your.. Your face AND you're talking I thought-" I said,  Delirious pulled my hands down so I can only see his eyes, "Tyler I'm going to be honest, I was never a mute and I was never really apart of the BB gang I was only a spy for this empire" he said I was shocked. An Inside man? "Oh.." I said moving my hands to his shoulders "Enough about me what are you doing here?" Delirious asks.
A hand grabs my wrist and pulls me over, it's Rook he places my back against him "He is my boyfriend" Rook says placing his hands on my shoulders, "Boyfriend? Wildcat is that true?" Delirious asked with a questionable look "Tyler won't use that name Wildcat anymore you'll either call him Tyler or Mr. Wine" Rook says giving him a look of disappointment "Sorry sir, it won't happen again" Delirious says, I look over to Nate with his hands behind his back, he looks at me we meet eyes I get flustered and turn around to Rook "Hey Sweetheart, how about I spend some time Delirious?" I asked of him grabbing hold of his hand. He looks at Delirious then at Nate "Go on ahead be back by 5 Nate come with me I have something I wish to discuss" he says looking at Nate. "Thanks baby" I kiss him and walk away with Delirious, he puts his arm around my shoulders "You going to explain whats happening?" Delirious asked "Well, let me start from the beginning...".

~Flashback, 3rd POV~

Delirious sits in a corner of a padded room dimly lit, he has his elbows on his knees pulling his hair whispering words to himself. Blood dripping from his wrist onto the floor.

~Delirious Flashback POV~
(From the point he's in the clinic he is still a mute talking to Wildcat I've just translated it to words you're welcome)

"It hurts why did we do this" I say blood dripping from my wrists, Because you're alone no one cares about what you do anymore my thoughts tell me "SHUT UP thats not true mom she..she loves me" I said leaking into a whisper. Her? We killed that bitch long ago and you still talk about her like she's here, my thoughts tell me getting on my nerve, I look at my arms to see the cuts and blood smired all over. "She is still here I didn't want to kill her she ment everything to me" She didn't mean shit to us she left our dad and abused us to let out her frustration. "No no no, she did it cause it was my fault I messed up and made them divorce".
Tell yourself that as long as you want but I want more, my eyes widen "More more what?" I asked, I heard a deep laugh I want more blood grab the blade and do it. I Reach to the blade and place it on my skin Do it slice your flesh open and watch the blood flow out, I press into my skin a glide the blade across my wrist what was that? Again but deeper. Tears start to roll off my cheeks as I press harder, you always were a baby when are you going to grow up I paused as I heard the metal door clicking, I looked up quickly and hid the blade in the padding.
The door opens to see the doctor, with a man behind him "This is him, we call him Delirious" I hide my arms behind my back. The man walks over to me and kneels down, "Show me your arms" he asks "He said I can't" I responded, "Who is he?" The man asks. I get angry "What do you care?" I say spitting on his jacket, he looks at it and stand up "Is this room you know?" He says with a gesture I don't understand "Both sir" the doctor says fidgeting with their glasses "Give us a minute alone" He asked the doctor nods and leaves closeing the door behind him, he turns back to me giving me a smirk.
He reaches into his jacket, and my mind goes wild What does he think he's doing what is he grabbing a gun? A knife to kill us with do something knock him down and stomp on his skull till he's left bleeding. Froze there doing nothing WHAT ARE YOU DOING REACT. I sat there with a scared expression, the man pulled out a small rectangular paper handing it to me, it read 'Kade Redclaw' I looked back at him he knocked on the metal plate on the door twice and it opened "I'll take him".

That's where my story should had ended... But it progressed, he took me in and trained me to be an assassin to fight to kill to the point I craved blood. Kade knew I was too strong so he assigned me as a inside man in the BB gang to take down the gangs leader 'Evan Fong' I ended up becoming a trusted memeber they disrespect eachother daily but they have good times.
One day I was back from a mission in the infirmary waiting on one of thier member Mini ladd, he didn't come back for awhile, then I notice a man walk in the infirmary doors he's smaller I've never seen him before. He seemed startled "O-oh I'm sorry to intrude I didn't notice someone was in here" he says walking to a table "I just need some bandages and ointments then I'll be-" he notices me and the bruises on my arm. He walks over to me and starts adressing my wonds "What are you doing?" I asked "Helping, Mini is off somewhere and I don't want you to wait here forever" he says putting a smile on his face "Why?" I asked he stopped for a moment "Everyone needs help sometime in their life, and I enjoy helping people and that's something I hope to teach everyone one day" he says.
He finishes wrapping my arm and wipes my face off with a cloth, "There all better I would be delighted to be your friend if you would let me, I would be willing to patch you up anytime" he says confidentially. The door swings open to see Vanoss "We don't have time for detours dumbass get going" he gave me a look I won't forget, "I'm coming" he yelled out he grabed the bandages and turned around, I grabbed his hand stopping him causing him to turn around "Yes?" He asked "Who..who are you I've never seen you here" I ask keeping hold of his hand "Tyler, but you can call me Wildcat" he says chuckling "I'm a.. Friend of Ev- Vanoss" he says.
We stand there looking at eachother for a minute, he slides his hand from mine and walks out the door.

For the first time, the voice in my head was slient I didn't feel the need to kill anymore I didn't crave blood, and I didn't feel the need to witness someones light fade out their eyes with their dying breath.

This was the first time I felt love in so long I didn't want to kill my family This is what I craved for so long..
I wanted to matter to somebody, and Tyler made me feel special like I was his.. His friend

When I heard that Wildcat left my heart sank, I felt abandoned by the only one I truly cared about just at that moment.. A old friend of mine spoke once more, You can't get rid of me Jonathon I ran out the room to Wildcats room cause thoughts of him made me happy I went in his room and closed the door behind me.
I sat in the corner of his room, Rocking back and forth "Delirious you doing alright?" Cartoonz asked on the other side of the door, I stay quite I know your intentions with him I punch the wall You want him all to yourself don't you? You couldn't bear to hear what Evan did to him so you left "Shut up" I whisper I bet the though of wildcat makes you hard I stand up and walk to his desk "He's just a friend and that's the only thing I want us to be" I whisper a bit louder.
The way he'd sat on your lap when it was Christmas you could feel his balls on your dick. I grab my memeber feeling it grow "This isn't what I want" I wispered, The way his hips moved when he danced with you loved that didn't you? "He was drunk I would never" I said walking to the bathroom splashing water on my face. I want him, you want him to beg for you to stop, when he's finally yours and you mark him.
This isn't what I wanted...

{Done enjoy this was 1.6k words you better have enjoyed >:( }