Only Words Bleed

How We Cope

Violet's Pov:

The next morning I don't want to do anything, but lie here. The doctors try to get me to eat something, but I refuse. I haven't really eaten anything since I got knocked out, but I don't feel hungry. I know it concerns the doctors, but I don't care. My stomach says otherwise, but I know if I eat anything it's only going to make me sick with the way I feel.

There's only one thing that can help me now and I don't want to do anything until she walks through that door. I'm not even excited when they disconnect the IV from my arm and remove the heart monitor. The IV leaves my arm feeling a bit sore and I'm sure a bruise will develop under the bandaging, but I hardly notice. It's a small inconvenience compared to the searing pain in my side.

The medication I was given before has worn off, but the doctors can't give me anything else until I eat something. Though to be honest, I don't really care if it hurts. It gives me something to feel other than the emptiness that consumes me inside. It seems like the pain is the only thing I feel anymore and it sounds messed up, but I'm holding onto that until I can feel something else. Something to make the other kind of pain to go away first.

But I don't get that feeling until a little past three when I hear a familiar voice talking outside the room with someone. Then she's walking through that door and I feel like everything just crashes down. I almost forget that I can get up and walk around, but once I realize that I'm not tied down anymore I don't hesitate to throw off the blanket and I go to meet her halfway.

I'm not ready for the transition, however, after being stuck in bed for so long. The movement is too fast and my vision goes all spotty like right before I had passed out at school. I stumble as it feels like my body is made of lead and I almost end up on my knees, if not for the brunette who catches me and steadies me. "Whoa, easy there Vi."

I'm kind of lightheaded on my feet, but I regain my awareness of the world. And just seeing her face makes everything ten times better. I get the chance to look into her eyes before my arms protectively wrap around her neck in a hug. Everything just floods to the front of my mind in a wave of emotion and I do the only thing I can to release everything I've gon through since she's been gone. I cry. I cry into her shoulder as she just holds me in an embrace.

I shake with each sob that's released and I don't care about the pain I cause in my side. My physical injuries can go to hell because all I want is her by my side. And I don't fucking care if it feels like my rib cage is on fire, I wasn't letting her go again.

Clem doesn't question it and just rubs my back while whispering reassuring words into my ear every now and then. Though seeing that I'm not calming down she eventually brings up the question. "Baby, what happened?"

Normally I'd want to stay quiet, but this time I want to tell her all of it. But when I pull back enough to face her, nothing comes out. I'm as silent as stars and I'm frustrated when I can't explain to her what's wrong as I desperately try and mouth out what happened.

Tears threaten me the more I get worked up. And it gets to be so much that Clem has to stop me and grip my shoulders to get me to look at her. "Whoa, whoa, calm down Vi. It's okay."

I freeze and there's silence between us, the only movement being the drops of saltwater that slide down my face. Clem looks into my eyes, and with her grip still on my shoulders, pulls herself closer until our lips connect. My shoulders relax and the fight leaves me at the sensation of her lips on mine as I get lost in the feeling. It was moments like this that I lived for, that made me feel alive. Clementine gave me that purpose in life with a simple action, she made the world worth living in. She was the reason I spent five years in hell. So it could all lead me up to this, to her.