Through My Green Eyes [A Harry Styles Fanfiction]

Nothing But Pain

I walked around my apartment for several weeks, practically two months, feeling pain and regret. I never left my place, and when I realized what I wanted to do, I went over to Darlene's to see Toni, but it turned out she wasn't there.

I got to Darlene's and took in a deep breath before doing anything. Hopefully Toni didn't tell Darlene what happened, because I don't need Darlene, Spencer, or Allie hating me. They were my second family, I couldn't lose them either.

Once I knocked on the door, Darlene answered, and first thing she said was, "Harry, what's wrong?" For I was still crying. It had been weeks since the break-up, and I couldn't stop crying about what happened. I just couldn't get over it.

"Is Toni here?" I asked while wiping my tears.

"No, I'm afraid she's not. She left  a few days ago." Darlene answered the moment she took me in to her house.

"She left? Where'd she go? Please tell me Darlene, I have to make things right with her." I cried. "I messed things up between us and I need to fix them."

"Well what happened? Toni didn't say anything." Darlene said as she sat me down on the couch.

"She didn't tell you what happened?" I asked confusingly. Usually Toni told her Mom anything, but then I remember, Toni said in her letter that she wasn't going to say anything about what happened.

"Yeah. All she said was that she needed to get away from here." Darlene said.

"God, this is my fault!" I said to myself. "Darlene, I'm an idiot! I made a really horrible mistake and it broke Toni's heart, and I want her to know that I'm truly sorry."

"I understand where you're coming from Harry, but don't you think she needs space?" Darlene asked sincerely. She doesn't know that Toni & I have been broken-up for two months.

"I do, but we've been broken up for two months, and I need to see her. Her stuff is still at the apartment, and I can't stop thinking of her. I need to see her." I have never cried this much in front of Darlene at all before. It was rare for me to even cry, but I did this to myself.

"Broken-up? You and Toni broke-up? Oh god, Harry, I'm sorry. Come here sweetie." Darlene said as she wrapped her arms around me and rubbed my back. She did her best to comfort me, but it was to had to be happy.

"Darlene, I know I don't ever ask you for anything really, but can you please help me with this? I want Toni back. I've never been this hurt without her, and I've never been so happy with her. I need Toni in my life."

"I know Harry, I know. Toni is the same exact way. You made her so happy and...you know what, I haven't answered your question. I love seeing you & Toni happy together, so I'll help you."

I sat up and looked at Darlene, trying to force a smile on my face, but I managed to fail at that. "Thank you Darlene. But how can I get her back if she's gone?"

"Fly out to where she went." Darlene responded.

"Fly out?" I asked looking confused. Some how I had the feeling that Toni was no longer in London.

"Oh yeah, I didn't tell you where she went...Toni went to go stay with her dad in Seattle, and she said she doesn't know when she'll be back here or if she'll ever be back."

I looked down at the floor, feeling disappointed in myself. I was the reason Toni went to go stay with her dad , and she hates her dad. It was official. I. Am. An. Idiot.

"I can't believe I did this to her. I'm such an idiot!" I said burrying my face in my hands.

"Harry, don't talk about yourself like that."

"But it's true. I made a mistake and it led to Toni leaving the country. I never meant to hurt her, it was never my intention because I love her with all my heart, and it's ruined because of one mistake.

"We all make mistakes, Harry. No matter how bad they are. Everyone makes mistakes...I'll tell you what...I'll get you a ticket for a flight to Seattle, I'll have my brother pick you up at the airport, he can take you to the hotel he works at, so it wasn't cost anything for you since he can take care of it, and you can go find Toni and work things out with her." Darlene explained.

"You would do that for me?" I asked while wiping the tears from my eyes.

"Of course. Harry, you're pretty much my son, I'm here for you. Why don't you go to your apartment with Spencer, pack some of your stuff then come back here for the night? We'll take you to the airport first thing in the morning." Darlene explained while rubbing my back.

"Thank you Darlene." I said giving her a hug.

"You're welcome Harry. Now let me go talk to Spencer. I'll be right back." Darlene said making her way upstairs to talk to Spencer.