The Emerald Thief - Merlin BBC [1]

Chapter 17: With Mindless Actions

Walking toward the volts was like a walk in the park. Most of the guards had been occupied by Percival's party, many of the men on duty partly intoxicated. I had passed the occasional party goers, but they could barely work, never mind see me.

As I snuck into the volts below Camelot's walls, my mind was blank of all thought. All the skills I had learnt came back to me as if I had never given them up. I didn't want to become as I once had so easily. It hurt me a lot to think of all the personal growth that would be tossed aside.

No matter how many times I reminded myself this wasn't for business, I kept finding myself enjoying the freeing feeling that comes with stealing. The volt was full of wondrous artifacts, each and everyone calling out to me with the magic contained inside.

I'm surprised at how easy it was to find what I was looking for. It almost seemed too easy, like someone was influencing what was happening like fate wanted me to find it.

"...an emerald stone engraved with silver patterns, just the stone in silver, nothing else attached...."

It was a beauty, like nothing I had ever seen before. The emerald stone was more than I had thought someone such as Allister would have asked for. But how can I question when I already have it in my possession and have locked the volt door behind as I flea my fears.

Time moves so quickly. I don't even realise that I'm out of the castle, sneaking down the main street. Only a few people are out, causing me to pull my cloak over my face as best I can. The night is silent, the moon now fully overhead in the late night, shining down eerily on the stone walls. I'm surprised by how easy it is, the guards not fully paying attention as I exit through the gates of the castle. With determination and my head held high, I march toward the forest.

"Hey, you!" a familiar voice yells, causing me to freeze, dread sinks in my stomach. A sword is drawn behind me, quickly raising my hands in defeat, turning on my heel.

Surely enough, there stands Sir Leon, approaching me, sword in hand. "Edythe?" he questions, his face filled with confusion, "What are you doing?"

I look back at the lit Castle in the distance, feeling the guilt hit me in the chest. All the emotion I've been suppressing hit me at once—the sadness, the anger, the dread, the resentment...the pain. My heart pounds even harder as I realise what I've done, realise the oath I have decided to take.

My eyes water, but I try to contain myself, feeling so weak for letting my emotions control me. "Tell Arthur I'm sorry", I croak, not realising how dry my throat was from crying earlier. The stone in my bag feels ten times heavier than I remember it.

It's now when I realise how much I don't want to leave, how much I have here, how many people I've grown to like here. I want to get to know Arthur. I want to learn about life in Camelot, my parents. I want to become a healer like Gaius and talk about stupid little things with Gwen and Merlin. I want to spend time with Percival and Elyan, learn new skills with Leon and tease Gwaine. And I hate that that's what I want.

"What?" Leon asks, eyebrows knitted together "you're not leaving...." Leon states. When I don't respond, Leon asks, looking at the ground in regret, "are you?"

The hurt in his voice hits me in the chest like an arrow piercing my skin. My heart aches under the weight of his words. If Leon is hurt by my leaving, everyone else will be too. I hate that it hurts to think of the pain I'll leave behind. I hate that the only way out of anything for me is to run, but I don't want to stay. I don't want to change, and I think that's why I can't bring myself to stay. That's why the voices urging me to run are stronger.

I shake the thoughts from my mind as the tears threaten to return. I don't allow myself to change my mind by banning any thoughts of regret. This is what's best for me. This is what's best for them.