My Best Friend's the God of Mischief // Peter x Loki

lie to me and call me your friend

Slipping out at night may be the only thing Loki was good at - Loki wanted to laugh, but he knew if he were to do that, it would be hysterical and he wouldn't be able to stop. He made sure to keep quiet and stay in the shadow, avoid being seen. At first he didn't know where to go. A stray lost in city he didn't know.

(Maybe Quentin was right. Maybe Loki couldn't survive on his own)

But if anything there was one thing Loki knew he did right; running away from Beck. Now the only questions that needed answers were what he was going to do next, where he should be heading to lick his wound. He didn't know Thor's whereabouts. Didn't have any other friends other than - Loki felt pain shooting down his chest and it wasn't physical. He thought Peter was his friend. Thought he was Peter's friend. How naive and stupid of him to ever believe such a monster could be loved.

At least - at the very least Peter still wanted him so he could turn him in to the government so they could perform a vivisection on him like he was some sort of a hideous creature Loki knew he was. At least he was still wanted.

(Other possible reason may had something to do with the fact Loki had nowhere else to go that despite how betrayed and hurt he was, he still wanted to see Peter and May to have them comfort him and tell him it was all going to be okay)

Finding a way back to the place he once called home was a struggle. But Loki eventually managed to wind up at May's front door, when the clock hit 9.00 A.M., looking beaten and broken. Physically and mentally. Standing there, part of him told him to turn back and run, go hide somewhere he would never be found. Loki was tempted to do just that. That coward part of him already trembling in fear by the thought of the rejection he could receive. What if they chased him away the second they saw him? What if him being here made them sick? Loki gulped hard. He slowly brought a shaky hand up and made himself knock.

Seconds felt like hours. In his head he was screaming at Peter why. Why the - false - kindness if Loki was a dangerous beast. Why the lack of chain and cage when they had a chance.

However when the door opened and May was standing there, then Peter joined her shortly after, Loki was speechless.

He was even more speechless when May pulled him into an extremely tight hug. Then it seemed she just remembered he was fragile because she loosened her embrace. Still not letting him go, but she wasn't crashing his bones anymore. And Loki sank into it even though he knew everything about this could be an act. It could all be an act since the very beginning. Still, just for the moment, he didn't care. Perhaps Loki was that pathetic.

"You - what - what happened to you?" She asked, sounding worried, when she eventually let go. Both her hands cupped his cheeks ever so gently (like Frigga always did every time she sensed something was bothering him)

What happened to him. Oh, so much had happened to him Loki didn't know where to start. Didn't know if he were to burst out crying if he were to go into every glory detail.

"I - I got lost," Loki said once he trusted his voice enough. Still it sounded broken. He was on the verge of breaking down and he knew May could tell. Peter could tell. Loki was somewhat thankful none of them pressed on the matter any further.

He almost believed it was real when Peter hugged him. He's out there, and he's a danger to everyone. He's a monster, and he shouldn't be terrorizing us for any longer, Loki remembered it as clear as day. Every word Peter had said repeating itself in Loki's head like a broken record. Yet Loki didn't have the heart to push Peter away. If there was anyone he hated it was himself for still wanting this even if it was fake.

(And he once taunted Thor about turning soft. If the old him could see him right now)

"I missed you," Peter said, still hugging him.

Lie. Stop lying to me! Loki wished he could say that. Wished he could push the kid away and snarl at him. He hugged back without being able to speak a word.

~~~

May did not ask how he got them, the mark on his temple from being hit with the back of a gun and all these bruises basically decorating most part of his skin, because she knew better than that. If Loki wanted to talk about it, he would speak on his own. Right now the last thing he needed was an interrogation.

"The world hasn't been kind to you, has it?" Was all she said, hand running through his hair while Peter stayed close, not taking his eyes off Loki as though the kid was afraid Loki was going to magically disappear into thin air.

"I'm sorry, Lo," she pushed a strand of hair and tugged it behind his ear, and he unconsciously leaned towards her.

This feels nice. This feels like home, said this small voice inside him. You are a fool. You are a pathetic fool. You heard what the kid said. No one loves you. Another voice protested and Loki just wanted it all to stop. He closed his eyes and curled up into a tiny ball on May's lap. Even if it was a lie. Even if he was that pathetic fool for still letting them toy with him, Loki was too exhausted to care.

~~~

Loki was surprised to see his room was still exactly the same as when he had left; every item stayed the same just how he had left them as though he had never been away. Loki thought, since they hated him, they would've gotten rid of it all, burnt every trace of him ever living here. Why. He wondered, but opted against asking it out loud.

"Mister Loki," Peter broke the silence, "you sure you don't want me to stay for a bit? Or you can crash at my room, you know, if you want to,"

Loki looked at him and wanted to challenge if he actually cared or just wanted to make sure he wouldn't escape and be a danger to those precious people Peter wanted so badly to protect. To prove himself to Stark.

"I'll be fine," was Loki's short response. His voice a little cold and he told himself the pain, when he saw the hurt look on Peter's face, wasn't real.

"But -"

"I think Loki just needs some time," May cut her nephew off. "He could use a little rest right now," and that, Peter knew, was that.

May looked at Loki and she smiled softly, kindly. "We're glad you decided to come back to us," she said, and as much as Loki hated to admit, her words - their words (lies) and their kindness (fake) tugged at his heartstrings.

She reached up to kiss his forehead and escorted herself and Peter out of the room, gently closing the door behind.

***

When he was alone Loki glanced at his bed. He wanted so badly to flop down on it and savor the familiar comfort he missed. But it was wrong, wasn't it? This was wrong. He knew it was a trap. They were waiting for the right time to send him to the cops. Yet here he was; deliberately stepped into it.

Thor was never going to come. Thor was probably dead. Died in a battle against Thanos. And they lied to him just to see how he would react, to play with his feelings. He was alone on his own. No one was going to save him, and in the end, if he was going to end up at the mercy of the government or S.H.I.E.L.D or HYDRA or even Quentin then so be it. Loki was done fighting, especially when he saw no point in doing so. They could kill him and Loki couldn't care less. At least. At the very least Peter and May's - false - kindness made him feel better. Their lies were the closest of being loved Loki could get.

He ended up on the floor, hugging himself in the corner, cold and alone, shedding silent tears.