Chapter Twelve

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'Just to love, that is enough; being loved, that is a bonus.' - Jack Hyles

Every morning, including this morning, the last full day I get a note. It makes me smile, but I wish I got to wake up with him one last time before we get back. It's almost like falling asleep with a ghost, sometimes I think I imagine him ever being in the same bed as me. At least now I have his notes.

The breakfast hall is full apart from the advisors so I sit with Nadia, I have a light breakfast; I feel sad to go and that takes away the slight hunger. Nadia mainly talks amongst her friends but I'm not really left out. I just need to kind of prepare before leaving tomorrow morning. 

We go to the seminar hall and I see Sebastian in one of his suits again. It's surprising honestly, he hasn't worn one in days, it seems strange already. He smiles when he sees me and I smile back, looking over him obviously, smiling and raising an eyebrow. He winks at me and I giggle before sitting down.

"So, today's the day, time to fill out the questionnaire again. Be honest, once everyone is done, we are going to discuss what we have learnt so give that a think too." Grace says. I bite my lip as I begin to fill out the form. I have honestly learnt things while being here. I just know I have also been preoccupied with Sebastian, with Adrian. I don't know, I'm nervous.

I flip over the first page and feel my phone buzz in my back pocket. I feel relief about it, I get a chance to breathe.

You've done great. Now stop biting your lip before I come over and kiss you.

I laugh and glance up; Sebastian puts his phone in his pocket and smiles subtly at me. I laugh quietly and continue the questionnaire. Continuing to bite my lip every now and again to tease him. 

I finish a bit before everyone else and I look over my answers, comparing them to what I think I remember answering the first time. I see some improvement and it settles me slightly. 

"Forget about the questionnaire." Sebastian says quietly as he sits next to me. I'm at the end of a bench so I shuffle slightly so he has more room. "It's meant to be a visual representation technique thing but I can tell it's making you feel worse. Close your eyes, take a deep breath and actually analyse how you feel." He says seriously. I look at him with apprehension and I close my eyes. I breathe in through my nose and out through my mouth. 

I have learnt. I have grown. I am more ready. I have also realised that the business may be mine, but I can still ask for help. There are people to help. There have been people to help and there is nothing wrong with that. As the owner I am a leader, not just a manager.

"Thank you." I whisper. 

"No problem." He says. "Love you." He whispers as he stands. I smile and he goes back to where he was. I sit and wait for everyone to finish, I listen carefully, listening to what other people have learnt, understanding it and applying it to myself. I even interject, helping answer people's other worries. I think it would be better heard from someone like me; a peer, rather than an advisor. Sebastian smiles proudly when I glance at him and I almost lose my train of thought.

"Yeah so honestly, we've all asked for help by coming here, although we've done it, we can still ask for help. There's nothing to worry about." I say, managing to remain calm.

"Exactly." Sebastian says. "I think that is all of the questions we had so if there aren't any more you can go pack or enjoy your last day. Bonfire starts at seven thirty." He says. We all get up and he waves me over.

"You should be an advisor next year." He says, making me laugh. "Seriously. You run your own successful business. You aren't a head of a department and it's a completely different type of business compared to mine. It would be great." He says.

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