secrets ➪ ricky bowen {1} ✔︎

Nɪɴᴇ:

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𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙉𝙞𝙣𝙚:
"Blocking."

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Is it alright if I stay here for the night? I just can't go home right now and I can't sleep at Big Red's with all his animal noises going on." He explained quickly.

I nodded. "Come in." I stepped aside as he entered and closed the door behind him.

"Sammy who's at the door? Oh, Ricky. What a lovely surprise." My mom smiled, entering the hallway.

"Mom is it okay if Ricky stays the night? He's got some stuff going on at home..."

"Oh of course. If you need anything, you let us know, alright?"

Ricky nodded. "Thank you, Mrs. McKinnon."

"Oh please, just call me Carla. I haven't been Mrs McKinnon in almost four years." She chuckled. "Sammy, you know where the spare blankets are."

I nodded. "Thanks Mom."

"Is the couch alright? I'm sorry we don't have any spare rooms for you to stay in."

He nodded with a small smile.

"Okay, I'll just go grab you some blankets."

I ran upstairs and pulled some out of the cupboard then went back downstairs and set up the couch for Ricky.

"Thanks." He said.

"It's okay." I smiled. "Are you hungry?"

"A little, but I don't want you to go to any trouble."

I shrugged. "There's some leftover Mac and Cheese if you want it."

"No its okay, Sammy, really. I'm fine."

"Ricky, you gotta eat something."

Ricky sighed and agreed. We walked to the kitchen and I heated up the Mac and Cheese for him, grabbing a glass from the cupboard and filling it with water.

"There you go." I smiled, handing his food over and leaning my elbows against the counter.

"This is really good." Ricky said with a mouth full of food.

I laughed softly. "I know right. My mom makes the best."

After he finished eating, we went up to my room. I started to pack away my keyboard and songbook but Ricky stopped me.

"What are you working on?" He asked.

"Oh, nothing...It's just a song I've been working on for a while. I finally figured out the chorus and the melody."

"Can I hear it?"

"It's really nothing. It's not even finished yet and-"

"Please?" He persisted. "I won't judge, I promise."

I sighed, and sat on my bed. Ricky sat down beside me, as I opened my book back up and started playing the chorus.

"All I want is love that lasts, is all I want too much to ask? Is it something wrong with me? All I want is a good guy, are my expectations far too high? Try my best, but what can I say? All I have is myself at the end of the day...but shouldn't that be enough for me?" I sang, releasing a sigh afterwards.

"It's not perfect, but it's getting there I guess."

"It's amazing, Sammy."

I gave him a halfhearted smile in response and closed my songbook, putting it and my keyboard away. "So, wanna tell me what happened at home?" I asked, changing the subject.

"My parents are splitting up. For good this time." Ricky explained quietly, his eyes becoming glassy. "It's just all too much, too soon, and I don't know what to do."

"Hey, listen," I held his hand and gave it a squeeze. "I'm here if you ever need anything, okay?"

Ricky looked down at my hand on his and placed his hand on top of mine. I pulled away after a moment and gave him a small smile.

"If it makes you feel any better, I know what you're going through. I felt the same way after my dad left and it was hard. But, I knew there was nothing I could do about it so I built up enough courage to move on. Eventually it gets better, Ricky, these things just take time."

"I never realised how similar our lives are until now."

"How so?"

"You're dad left, my mom's leaving, and technically neither of us have been on a stage or sung in front of a crowd before..."

"At least one of us knows the difference between jazz hands and spirit fingers." I smirked.

Ricky punched my arm playfully. "Shut up."

I laughed as he went red in the cheeks. "You're cute when you're embarrassed."

I froze.

Did I just say that OUT LOUD?! 

Oh lord, please swallow me whole right now.

"Um...thanks." He chuckled. "So are you."

I let out a short, nervous laugh and checked my phone for the time. It was almost 11pm.

"It's getting late, we should get some sleep." I said.

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea. Who knows what Miss Jen is gonna be like next rehearsal."

"Preferably back to her weird, fun self."

I followed Ricky downstairs into the living room.

"Need anything else?" I asked as he laid down on our couch.

He shook his head and sent me a small smile. "No, I'm good. Night, Sammy."

"Night Ricky." I smiled. The lights went out as I entered my room and I closed my door quietly.

I switched off my lamp and stared at my roof, my head buzzing.

I was starting to feel things. Things that I'd been hoping to avoid for as long as possible. But each time I hung out with him, and got to know him better, I could feel myself going further and further down that path.

My head spun and the realisation hit me like a ton of bricks.

I like Ricky Bowen and don't know what to do.

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Shorter chapter this time but I hope you still enjoyed hehe I know it's been slow these last few chapters but things are starting to get going lol

Also creds to Liv for 'All I Want', she totally outsold & it's such a good song we stan