Somebody to hold t.h.

Chapter Thirty Five

Advice if you really want to cry: listen to "Falling" by Harry Styles lol, sorry

When Evie woke up and got ready for work Tom wasn't there anymore. He must have left early. Somehow she was incredibly disappointed. Of course it was stupid to think yesterday when he held her changed anything between them. He just did it to save her because that's just the kind of person he is. A hero.

Still she had to admit to herself that there was a glimmer of hope in her heart that now everything will finally go back to how it was.

Her disappointment followed her through her work day where she didn't even see Tom at all.

Meanwhile Tom decided he couldn't bare working anymore so he drove back home around noon. Yesterday's event was still way too prominent on his mind to move on yet. The thought of loosing her scared him so much he felt sick. Back in the apartment he laid down in her bed taking in her scent closing his eyes, pretending she was here with him. The tears were streaming down his face freely and his body felt numb. She was the most precious creature on earth for him. He didn't deserve her but he was deeply selfish. He had to at least see her everyday if he already couldn't be with her.

His heart was aching, his arms were itching to be wrapped around her small body again and his hands missed the way hers fit so perfectly into them. He missed her.

He realized how pathetic he must look right now, laying on her bed, cuddling her pillow crying his eyes out. Especially when it was him who caused this situation in the first place. It was then when his phone rang. Jake was calling.

"Hello?", he asked confused about how he got his number in the first place.

"Tom are you alone?", Jake asked.

"Yes she is still at work."

"She told me what happened between you and what had happened yesterday. She really isn't doing well. I am worried about her."

"Me too. She really scared me yesterday.", Tom admitted feeling ashamed and like it was his fault.

"Dude, I know you are scared. But she really needs you. Get over it already and tell her how you feel. You'll just end up killing the both of you with that bullshit."

"She deserves so much better, you know that."

"Are you fucking kidding me right now? Don't tell me you are doing this to the both of you because of your self esteem issues. Tom she has never even looked twice at another guy since I've known her. She literally worships you."

"But I am not good for her."

"Why? Because you don't love her? Tom you being at home right now weeping over her should show you-"

"Of course I fucking love her. I have loved her this whole time.", Tom interrupted, irritation evident in his voice.

"Then what is your issue? You love her? Then goddamn tell her and take her already! You are literally just wasting everyone's time by crying like a baby about your feelings and how you are not good enough. This girl adores you with everything you are. Why can't you understand?"

"I want her to be with someone kind, who loves her and can protect her."

"Well I've seen you do that when I was with you two already so what is your point?"

"You don't want me to be with her-"

"Tom stop that shit right now. You made her happier than anyone has ever done. She told me you make her feel like home, she has never felt at home before with the situation she was in with her parents. You are so good for her. Plus you protect her. If there's anyone in this world remotely good enough for her it's you. Get that through your fucking head already and man up again."