Drunk Texting | T. Drake ✔

[02]

***

[ T <•> J ]

J: the gremlin has been looking for you.

T: shit.

T: don't tell him where I am, please.

J: sure bud.

J: I sent him the location instead.

T: what the fuck, Jason?

J: you're welcome.

J: this is what you get for not saving coffee for me at breakfast.

T: I had said I was sorry!

T: there was no need to set the gremlin on me.

T: shit, he's outside.

J: enjoy the brotherly bonding, kiddo.

T: I hate you.

J: the feeling is mutual.

***

J: either you're changing out of that shirt or I'm gonna have to do something.

T: why? I like this shirt.

J: has anyone ever told you that even a grandma would have better style sense than you.

J: you're an absolute dunce when it comes to fashion.

T: you're no fashion god either so...

J: say that to my Instagram followers, bitch!

J: I'm giving you five minutes. If you haven't changed by then, I'll rip it off.

T: no... Don't you dare...

J: yeah right, go cower behind Dickybird. He won't be able to save you either.

***

T: that was a hundred and fifty, Todd.

J: a hundred ad fifty what? Dollars or push ups?

T: squats.

J: pay up.

***

T: why the fuck did you blow up the Bowery?

J: that's for me to know and you to stay the fuck out of.

T: Jay, if Bruce finds out...

J: who's gonna tell him anyway?  You?  I don't think so. You're not that stupid to die so young.

T: he has other resources too, y'know.

J: for example?

T: Damian.

J: fuck.

J: do you know where the little demon is? I might have to lock him up for a while.

T: gladly. He's on his way to the Bat Cave so you have exactly five minutes to abduct him.

J: on it. 

***

[ T <•> I ]

T: I still don't know why I'm texting you.

I: just admit it, Timbelina, you've grown attached to me.

T: no way.

I: yes way.

***

T: okay so I know why I text you and keep talking to you.