girl crush [ idols x idol!oc ]

girl crush [ fifty four ]

tapping my pencil against the table, i kept thinking about what i could possibly write about. i'm down with the last song i need for the mini album, but i couldn't think of anything to write about. did i just overestimate myself, that i was able to make a mini album mostly with only my effort.

i groaned, and then placed my head on the table. aish. tske responsibility, choi sooji. you brought this upon yourself.

"having trouble with the songs?" asked a voice behind me, making me flinch and then sit up straight.

once i turned around, i was surprised to see that it was taemin. he gave me a smile, and i nodded.

"yeah, kinda. i'm down to the last song, yet i don't know what to write about anymore," i replied, my voice fading.

he stood beside me, and then leaned over the paper i was writing on. he placed a hand on his chin, and then took the pencil from me.

"hey, what are you doing?" i asked, trying to look at the paper but he was covering it.

"yah! no peeking!" he said, making me gape at him and then playfully hit his arm. aish, this guy!

once he gave me the paper, we walked out of the room after a small wave. after the door was shut, i rushed to look at the paper, only to see that he wrote a single sentence.

why not write about how forbidden love feels, where they cannot be because of what the people might think of them?

i froze. forbidden love. thinking about it, it might fit if i wrote the song right. smiling, i told myself i'd say my thanks to taemin later.

and so, i started writing the song with only one person in mind.

"CHOI SOOJI!" called someone, as i was about to exit the cafe i went to.

my eyes widened, as i realized who it was. she was lucky there weren't many other people here but older ones who didn't give a care who we were. there she stood, a wide grin across her face as the other girls were sat on the table. aina, minsoo, jaemin, and hanbyun.

"omo, it's really her," said hanbyun unnie, making me smile and nod.

having nothing else to do, i decided to hang with them for a while. it's been a while since we last had fun with each other, with everything going on. i'm just really happy that we're finally on good terms, too. i sat down next to minsoo unnie, and then she gave me a side hug. 

"what's up? are you guys up to something new?" i asked, smiling at them and waiting for a good response. however, i was surprised at what they told me.

"actually, we aren't even getting ready for a comeback yet. even blackpink. i don't even know when we'll have our comeback," said aina unnie, making me furrow my brows.

"yeah. also, we've been offered endorsements and such but we don't really don't want to do stuff like that right now, you know? it would really make us happy and calmed down if yg just let us prepare for a comeback. we signed for music, not for modelling. not that we're complaining. i guess, modelling and endorsing stuff is fun, too. but, you get what i mean, right?" said jaemin unnie, and i slowly nodded.

"have you tried talking to manager-nim about it?" i asked, and then they all looked at each other hesitantly so it was minsoo unnie who broke the silence.

"we did, but the manager's tight-lipped, too," she replied, making me sigh.

that's just plain frustrating. as an artist, it's just natural for us to feel the need to perform and make new music, but not being able to do so while wanting to is just really frustrating. i didn't know the right words to say, but i spoke anyway.

"i'm... actually working for a comeback. i wrote my last song earlier, taemin helped me have an idea. so, how's modelling going?" i asked, and then they all smiled.

"it's great that you're able to have a comeback coming up! actually, i think sm's good to you, good for you. since... you started with them and all, too," said hanbyun unnie, her voice fading.

"wait, we've seen videos of you and taeyong around, like, there are a lot. but what's new is that there's this fan on twitter that says... she saw you in a convenience store buying banana milk with jungkook? i didn't know you knew him," said aina unnie, making widen my eyes.

"oh? jinjja? well... taeyong and i are pretty close so it's understandable. but jungkook-sunbaenim? it was just at that moment in the convenience store that we were grabbing the same banana milk. they were running out of those. haha," i said, and then they narrowed their eyes at me.

"you're boy-magnet, you know that? i mean, you're really close with shinee members even before we debuted, i mean, since you used to be under sm before yg. then you were close with johnny of nct, too because you trained with him under the smrookies. then, there's taeyong. ikon, too! and felix,  you're friends with him. also, you're close with vernon, aren't you? then, there's also astro. hey, i haven't heard anything about you and eunwoo in so long. sanha says you haven't talked in quite some time, too. what's going on?" said jaemin unnie, so i sighed before looking away.

"it's a long story. but eunwoo said some hurtful things, and i might have overreacted but it's just that i couldn't forget that easily, you know? it still hurts, but i think i'm really fine now. taeyong's taking care of me well-"

"what taking care? omo, don't tell me-"

"shh!"

"oh, my god. she just always gets involved with others without us knowing. i, oh, god."

"what do you expect from the nation's girl crush?"

"y-yaaaah!"