The trouble maker

Chapter - 40

So many words passed through my mind as if they were in a car racing and I was the host trying to figure out which word was the right one and ran the fastest. Amazed? Surprise? Absurd? Ambiguous? Lost? Astonish? Astound? Stun? Flabbergast? Stupefy? or Gobsmacked? Yeah, gobsmacked would be the most appropriate word to describe my confused ass mind right now.

Since I was young, I had issues with laughing whenever something serious seemed to happen and it was bad. I mean, trying to hold your laugh to the extend where tears escaped your eyes? I had those moments several times and there was nothing I could do, it was always a real struggle to try and hold my laugh because if I didn't hold it in, it would be very immodest or discourteous, and I heard people said to bite your cheeks from the inside to let go of the uncontrollable laughter building up inside you like a storm and I had tried that method too, but been there, done that, no success.

And now as Alex sat beside me, wearing the most solemn expression I'd ever seen him wore, I felt the part of giggling building up inside me, I cracked a small laughed as I said, "Your real father? How many fathers do you have? 5?" But every bit of the funny butterfly I felt inside dwindled away as I saw his expression, "You're joking, right?" I asked, carefully. It was as if I hold a million-dollar glass vase and if I did not say the right word, it would break into thousand pieces.

He did not move his head and continued to stare in the dark. "Nature is the best gift of all, he used to say, if one truly understands nature, he understands the true meaning of joy and beauty."

I was immensely left dumb-founded, what on earth was he talking about? If Mr. Bilimoria was not Alex's real father? Who was? And why did he live as Mr. Bilimoria's son? No, nothing made sense, it can't be, given the fact that Alex looked so much like Mr. Bilimoria, from their long eye lashes and thick eyebrows and their heights and eyes, they were a father and a son, no doubt. But what was he saying?

"He loved hunting and fishing, he loved spending the night in an open air, with telescope gazing at the stars, he used to fidget and wail whenever there's no stars at night. He was a magnanimous person, my dad." He murmured, " He had many sympathies for others, and maybe that's why he let his selfish twin brother ruin his life and yet forgave him at the end."

I squinted at him and saw how strained he looked, for the first time in a long time, there were no thoughts in my mind, and I had no words to say. I felt like anything I said would come out wrong.

"You might be very surprise?" He asked solemnly.

"Yes...that's." I tried saying something but could not find any words to support me further. But luckily, Alex didn't give in to my lost for words moments and went on.

"His name is Clifford Bilimoria, twin brother of my so-called father on official papers Richard Bilimoria, everyone assumed that it was a reckless accident that cause the death of my parents, but it's funny how fast people forget about the dead as if they were never there." He put his hands up in his forehead and rubbed it slightly.

The best thing I could do was to listen, to just sit there and listen.

"I was born in Yugur, my father loved Yugur more than Montana where he migrated from, but time changed everything, we used to be a happy family, and and-" I gazed to see his expression as he paused a bit, he looked like he felt a pang of nostalgia. "I was only six years old when I was sent to Montana and started staying with Richard, I remember the day they registered my name on their family register, and told me that I was their son from that moment on wards." He let out a big sigh, and without knowing it, I held his hands tenderly. The moment I realized that I held his hands, it was too late to withdraw it, he held my hands back tightly as though he was afraid I would be gone into ashes.

"I didn't have any clue what happened," He went on, "Nobody told me anything, I missed my mother, I still remember the slight sense of her warm hugs when I can't fall asleep at night, I missed my father, but I never even get to see his picture." I felt like I could see his agony as if they had physical appearance. "Richard is the heir of my grandfather's company which he was after ever since he was young, my father never even wanted any part in it, so he and my mum left Montana for good, it was a good time." I saw a slight smile on the corner of his lips as he talked about his real parents. "The only thing Richard could not have in this world, is a child. I had heard of their several miscarriages while I was young, but I never consider that I would be the replacement for those unborn souls."

I felt so perplexed as he went on, I wanted to shush him, to make him shut up so I could have time to think about everything he just told me, but at the same time, I wanted him to go on.

"I only learn about the truth of my parent's death when I was 8 years old, nobody tells me anything, and I never even spent time with Richard and his wife, I saw them once or twice a month." Then slowly, he sifted his gaze to me, "Nobody knows this, not the school or the world. Not even Simon or Levi, to the world I'm Alexander Bilimoria, the one and only son of a powerful businessman Richard Bilimoria, but the truth is I'm just an orphan."

"As my father lived a normal life and did not engage himself in any business matter, it was easy for Richard to erase everything about him, as though he never lived."

Simon and Levi did not even know about this? Before I could stop myself, words left my mouth, "Why did you tell me all this?"

"I want to let you know who I really am, before I fully commit myself to you." He looked at my eyes, "And that's me Alex, and this orphan Alex like you."

"I know I'm very easy to not like, but just give me one chance to show you how much I'm willing to fight for you, I know everything that I am doesn't deserve any bit of you, but I'm willing to go to any length to make myself worthy enough for you." As he said those words, I felt as if my very soul was chipped away the very second.

I wanted to explain how many disasters I had seen disappear in what felt like only seconds we spent together in the car compared to the whole span of time. "Let's have a deep conversation," He went on, "Tell me about your happiness, tell me about what keeps you up at night, tell me what can make you cry easily, tell me what song made you feel relax, tell me everything that's going on in your mind, I'm learning you."

What had I done to catch his attention? To have him interested in not just my looks, but my thoughts?