Shape of You (+18)

Chapter Twenty-Seven

▬▬▬▬ Marley's POV ▬▬▬▬

He's mine?

Over and over again, his words replayed in my mind, and I had a hard time focusing on Joel's hands, his lips, or keeping up with any of his movements when my mind was so active.

He said he was mine. That I was his.

He said all of that right after pleading for honesty.

How is that honest?

My thoughts and emotions were a mess of mushy confusion. He knew better. Joel knew better than to say something like that, and yet he still did, and he was still here. I hadn't kicked him out. Hadn't fussed him out. The man was kissing my neck and I hadn't stopped him.

Maybe that's because you want to be his.

I closed my eyes in frustration, trying to make sense of things, of what we were, of what we were doing. Our words weren't matching up with our actions. We say we're just sleeping together, but it doesn't feel like we are. We say we'll be friends, but the line between that and more has been blurred from the start.

"Hey, hey, Marley?" Joel called, his rough hand gently carressing my face, drawing me out of my mind. "Come back to me, baby."

"I'm sorry," I apologized, embarrassed to have drifted so badly. "I'm thinking too much."

"I can tell," he laughed softly, brown eyes dancing with what I thought might be affection. "Those gears in your head were working so hard I saw smoke coming out your ears."

Rolling my eyes while trying not to smile, I linked my fingers behind his neck, my thumbs rubbing back and forth against his pale skin.

"I want you here with me, darling. Don't think too much, don't fight it. Be here. Feel the moment."

I was nodding in agreement before he even finished speaking, already giving in. My conscious wasn't silent, but I tried hard to ignore her, and with Joel's able hands working my body to a needy place, that task became easier and easier.

Feel the moment.

My heated gazed settled on Joel's face, seeing determination and desire, hunger and praise as he peeled the long, thigh-high, candy striped socks off each of my legs. Slowly, so slowly, his fingertips grazed the newly exposed skin, like butterfly kisses dusting up and down, picking random spots to massage, his sights set on smooth skin.

"How can someone be so...desirable?" he mumbled, his voice soft, so quiet I doubted it was meant for my ears. With a steady, blazing stare, Joel's eyes found mine, and he said louder than before, "I wanted to go slow this time...but, I don't think I can."

I was already so pent up, needing release because of his restrained touches, that I wasn't sure I'd survive it if he didn't fuck me hard and fast, right now. I'd never had it slow, and wasn't interested in experimenting when I knew what would certainly get me off.

"No. I want it hard," I shook my head, sitting up to help him pull my dress off. My hard, bare nipples tightened at the lack of covering, feeling the cool air, but Joel's hot mouth latched on in no time at all. "I need it fast."

Biting down for a second before licking the sting away, he kissed a path to my other breast, giving it the same attention. He took his time licking, sucking, biting, kissing. All that did was make me more impatient.

"Joel, please," I whimpered. This was taking too long.

Lifting his head from my chest, he asked, "What's the rush?"