Intezaar

Chapter-15

**I DESERVE HIM**

Shikhar's Pov...

The bitterness in Suhana's voice was piercing my heart. I wanted to say something... everything... to her but it felt like I was out of words.

Gathering the much needed courage, I once again tried to vocalize what I wanted to, "I know... I... kno... know Sohu" but ended up suttering badly and hoped her to understand me just by looking in my eyes like she used to do in past.

But instead of understanding, only one thing was visible in her eyes and that was hurt... Only and only hurt.

"You know nothing Shikhar... nothing.
You don't know how heartbroken I was when that brother of yours left me.
You don't know how much I needed you at that moment but you were nowhere to be found.
You don't know how helpless I was when Baba forced me to abort my baby.
You don't know how much I all alone fought with my own parents to save my unborn but all in vein.
I had neither my so called best friend nor my boyfriend to held me and to console me. 
I had no one with me Shikhar... no one." Suhana slided down against the counter and pulled her knees to her chest while wrapping her arms around them as if it will help her to hold herself together.

Her hysterical sobbing made me felt the smallest creature of this world for hurting someone whom I claim to be my bestfriend.

I crouched down to her level and gently wiped off the moisture from her face. She got startled by my touch but didn't reacted.

I shushed her and raised her face to my eye level with my index finger.

"I admit that I have done a grave mistake but dont you wanna know the reason behind it?" I enunciated each word very calmly and luckily this time Suhana didn't pushed me away.

Taking her silence as a cue, I continued further.

"Main dar gaya tha Suhana. I got... I got scared when that asshole brother of mine told me about your pregnancy. I was this much mad at him that we even got indulged in a really very ugly fight and as result of that he went away somewhere. For weeks, I like a fool searched for him every where but failed and in the end when I all defeated returned back to Ambala, the news of your marriage welcomed me." Suhana was listening to me very intently and her eyes were glittering with the unshed tears.

"Suhana, till this day I was regreting for not supporting you in your toughest time" I wiped off the tears that slipped down from my eyes and continued "but today I am glad that finally God give me another chance to ask your forgiveness for me and my brother. Please forgive me and Vishal; Suhana, please" I pleaded her with folded hands.

She hold my hands in hers and said in a monotonous voice "Its not easy for me to forget everything and forgive you and especially Vishal. But for the sake of old times... Our friendship... I'll try".

The distantness I felt in her voice, made me realise that I have to make a long way to gain her forgiveness and I was all ready for that.

"Ok... Come on now... Get up and lets go out otherwise Aksh will come here in no time" I stood up while extending my hand towards Suhana.

She gripped my forwarded hand in hers and balanced herself on her feet.

We made our way out the restroom and walked to where Aksh and Kirti were seated.