REDEMPTIVE | ✔️

49. A flower wilted but

Light.

Bright light it was when she tried to open her eyes lazily. One thing she felt was pain all over in her body. Due to sharp rays that stung her eyes, she closed her eyes again. With her eyes shut she tried to left her weak body with her elbows so that she could sit but her grogginess didn't let her do so.

There was pain everywhere, her back, her legs and more specifically her head. To her it felt as if someone was hitting her scalp with a hammer. Waking up with pain was now a routine. It wasn't new now.

She tried to reopen her eyes, adjusting them to the surrounding. She just dreaded the sight which she knew she would see again just the second she'd open her eyes. Alone in her room, back in her tayya Abbu's home. She on her bed, no more warmness of Zumeer's body beside her. But even if Zumeer is here, her small bed wouldn't have enough room to let him in.

Grumbling due to her pain, she sat up. Slowly looking around. It was the dawn of winter season. Soon it will be the days when roads would be covered in snow and cars parked on them, would seem to be wearing a white gown.

Her room that used to be in a corner of 2nd storey no more felt safe to her. She fought with demons at nights and when she slept, there were nothing but her sweating and crying again when nightmares would hit her sleeping form. That window where she'd spent so much of her time standing and wondering felt so unwanted.

She didn't want that room again because she missed her official room that she shared with Zumeer. She hated her room here in her tayya Abbu's home even if she had spent her 22 years here. Those white walls reminded her of nothing but that day when she lost her little soul. It reminded her of nothing but tears that she had fallen. When she would look up at the ceiling, her plain white paint would remind her of that hospital. Those sun rays seemed to come from the same window, the same way that white shine had woken her up the next day there. Everything reminded her of hospital room and she hated that.

Pushing herself even up. She made a plunge to hang out finally. Since the day she had come here she hadn't gone out. Today she decided to meet her buddies because she missed them a lot. Even her members of her family asked her. Everyone pitied her wilting form, the way she had lost weight due to her intense fight with depression. She felt as if she had lost already, as if monsters inside her head were winning. She no more felt her. Books on her shelf didn't excite her anymore. She felt nothing but unnecessary.

A thought that had been dreading her, haunting her day and night— will Zumeer want her after all this, will he still say he loves her. Everywhere she found a big no.

How could she forget it when she was slowly waking up, her senses coming back but her body lacked the energy to even move a muscle, opening eyes was a far thing. Where they all thought she is still sleeping due to injection there, she wasn't. Her mind was awake. She could hear them talk but couldn't response nor move.

She felt someone whispering something constantly. She heard voices in addition to it. She couldn't comprehend who that was. Someone was messaging her scalp, she felt fingers moving on her forehead, someone blowing something on her.

Now her mind could register what they all were saying. She could comprehend voices. They were speaking something, her family but Zalay didn't pay any heed she just wanted to go back to sleep without a care in this world until she heard someone say, "I wanted a grandchild. She couldn't even give me that!"

Those words hit harder as if someone stabbed her chest. She tried open her eyes and see who said that. It was a woman from the pitch. She kept speaking but her mind was numb. Her senses fleeing and she felt dozing. Last words which were so clear as if spoken from very near were, "Ammi don't blame her."