The week had flown by and the silence hadn't left since that day. It felt like everyone had something weighing on their mind. But I was not going to be with the host club today but instead meeting my likely future partner. The thought had me sick to my stomach. Last night was the wrist my father had ever been the things that we did for "practice" made. Me sick physically and mentally but I couldn't not change my future that I had come to accept.
There are just fake people in this world whose only purpose in life is to complete their own goals no matter who they step on to get there.
Currently though I am staring myself down in the mirror, my contacts gone my hood down and my make up removed and I felt disgusting. It was like I was looking at a reflection of someone else. My bright eyes where to complicated to be pretty, the were strange and perplexing, my dark black hair was just to harsh against my light pale skin tone that could almost be described as white itself. I hated everything about it. I was too ugly to be deserving of anyone.
My cinflixed feeling battled and swirled around within me as despite my father best wishes I grabbed one of my favourite hoodie and layered it over my slender frame hoping to diguse my fat body underneath.
I slowly raised my hood but I left my contacts and make up off because I could only push my father so far when it come to my appearance for my future partner.
It wasn't long after I was dressed when I was greeted with a loud and harsh knock on the door, a knock that I recognised all to well.
My father.
I rush to the door to open it trying to slow my actions to make myself appear calm and collected like my father would wish me to be.
Only to be greeted my his usual unhappy face. "So your going to hide your disgusting body to even your future partner, how deceiving you are son.". I clenched my hands at my side because no matter how may times he says something like that I can't help but want warmth and approval from my father. I slowly and rigidly nodded." Hurry I want you to be positioned in the garden before they turn up, and remember this is Very important if you mess. This up you will wish you wouldn't have. I won't hear a word of complaint from you about your partner either understand?!"
A sickly feeling rose in my stomach and I felt tired in a way I never had before and once again I slowly nodded to my so card father to flow him to the gardens in which I was supposed to meet my future partner.
A concept that I still cannot get my head around as my mixed feelings kept haunting every decision I have made regarding my life and my future.
Nonetheless I followed my father slowly out of the door and intl my garden to be greeted with a lovely soft breeze and the perfect amout of sun but that did not ease my nerves by any standard.
I was lead to a bench where my father told me quite simply to stay here and try to remain presentable for the guest. I got this whole lecture about how important it is that I don't disappoint him this one singular time. But the sickly feeling in my stomach told me that I just. Might be awaiting my doom as I sat on the bench staring off into the distance hoping that maybe this could just be a mediocre experience. That is the most I can really hope for as I wait.
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The Secretly Submissive type (Ohshc)
FanfictionHave you ever wished to be stronger have you ever wished to feel taller or to be smarter? This is the one thing this boy doesn't want. He wants to feel human again, he wants to share his pain his smile his laugh but he doesn't remember how or who to...
