Devil's Sons M.C. (Manxman)

15.

Jesse

"Thanks for coming to get Laney early." Renee says with a smile immediately I hop out of my old beat up truck.

I've barely shut the door of the automobile when my son squirms out of his mothers arms and runs straight for me. "Dada" he screams as his little legs carry him quickly to where I meet him halfway with my arms open for him to run into. I bury my face into his hair that still has that baby smell clinging to it as his small arms wrap around me.

I'd been at the club's warehouse when Renee had called me to come pick up Delane earlier than usual. She had an appointment of some sort to keep so I agreed to the arrangement and asked for the afternoon off from Luke. I was supposed to do a cash pickup with the man but he understands the family comes first so I'd swapped with Ryker.

"I missed you little man." I move the stray strand of hair out of my son's face, a toothy smile present on his face. Laney raises his hands to be carried, and I immediately lift him onto my shoulders so he sits like the lord that he is. "Everything okay?" I ask Renee.

"Uhm yeah choir practice at church so I thought Laney would have more fun at yours." I nod in understanding. "You used to hate coming with me." She muses.

"That's not true it was uh very.. uh" I try to look for a synonym for boring but in a respectful way so it doesn't sound like I'm saying boring but that's exactly what I mean, just more respectful. Now I just need the word to magically appear in my brain.

"Boring?" She offers and I chuckle in response.

I raise my hand in surrender "You said it not me." It really wasn't that bad to be fair, mostly just a group of mostly women practicing songs and body movements. Okay I lied thinking back now it really was boring but Renee would make me go with her each week. Then she stopped going after we split and Laney's arrival which is why I guess I'm surprised that she's going back to church.

"I could always tell mister." She states softly and I laugh at that, guess I wasn't being subtle.

"It's been a while you went to church." I say mostly in observation. Almost five years should be a record or something.

"Yeah and I've felt it every single day, like there's a void in my life that I need to fill and just being in the church and singing used to do that for me. I've missed that." I've never understood that feeling even when we were together I tried to but it just never clicked for me.

The early years of my life was with a junkie mom and then Mel was born. Mom had stayed clean for Mel but the damage was already done and everyone knew her as the junkie lady. In a small town like Stocker, word gets around fast and negative words spread 10x faster. Any void I've ever had or felt was always filled with thoughts of my family and loyalty to them, rarely did anything else matter. I guess in a way though, the church was Renee's family, that's where she felt safe so maybe we're not that different at all.

"Then you should get back to it and do what you do best." I reply easily. She has the best singing voice I'd ever been opportune to hear. Her voice could bring tremors and goosebumps on the skin of even the coldest of hearts.

"Thanks Jesse. I should leave now." I bring down the little man who's having the time of his life playing with my hair. "I'll see you later baby." She whispers to Laney and I just watch quietly as my son and his mother hug each other and she places a kiss on his forehead before ruffling his wavy hair.

"Love ya mommy." Laney waves and Renee waves back. He runs back to grab onto my leg and I lift him back up, this time he sits on my hips.

"Take care JJ." I reply with a 'you too' before watching her settle into her car and I proceed to do the same.

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I've put Laney to bed after a tough battle of a game called 'put your pajamas on'. The little man just hated clothes for some unknown reason that I should maybe look into. He'd eventually worn himself out and fell asleep immediately his head hit the bed. Mel had also retired into her room so it was just me in the sitting room watching some show called 'Manifest'.

A knock on the door has me on my feet to check who it is at this time of the night. It's been a busy week so I'd not really seen bruiser around so it's a little unexpected to see him at my door.

There's no words spoken between us as Hunter closes the distance between us in one swift move and pins me against the wall and begins to ravish my mouth like a starved animal. He closes the door with his foot, while his hands touch everywhere on my body like a form of memorization technique or reacquaintance moment. Whichever one it is, I find myself melting in his strong bruising grip. My tongue dances rhythmically with his, I bite his bottom lip and receive a groan in response.

"Missed you." He mumbles against my lips, Hunter's breath fans my face softly. Both our breathings so heavy and wanting. I reattach our lips and as usual the sparks fly, the wanton need to do something, find each other overtaking our senses. I feel myself moving back as bruiser backs us up onto the couch and I land with a small painless thud, our lips still connected.

"Kids?"

"Asleep." I reply wounding my arms around bruiser to draw him back to me and connect our lips again. I remove his leather cut jacket as he fumbles with his belt buckle, we do the same with the white shirt I have on and resume the lip action. Or maybe that's the wake up call that I needed to bring me out of this haze of lust that I was wrapped in. I unwound my arms from Hunter's torso, my interest no longer present in the activity.

"What, you don't want to?" Hunter halts after noticing my disinterest in our usual routine. I struggle internally on how to answer that question. Of course I want to indulge in mind-blowing hot sweaty sex but something is holding me back and I can't pinpoint exactly what it is. Maybe after a month of doing the same thing multiple times, you just want something different or something more.

I proceed to give the easiest answer I can conjure up "I uh I'm not in the mood." Shock covers his handsome face and he narrows his eyes at me. I guess the fact that moments ago I was ready to jump him against the wall and my demeanor right now contradicts each other.

"Why, what's wrong?" I'm not sure either. Hunter gets off me and takes a seat on the couch, I pull myself up from the position I was laying in too. Both of us trying to regulate our breaths back to normal in the slightly tense atmosphere. "Look I'm not doing you if you don't want it so might as well let me know." His eyes focus on me studiously probably trying to decipher where all this change in attitude was coming from.

"I guess I'm just tired of this whole sex routine that's all we do, fuck like bunnies." I blurt out.

It's quiet for the next couple of minutes and I glance at Hunter to say something to what I've said. I successfully killed the mood anyway so might as well finish the discussion.

"So what do you want?" I'm not sure if he really cares to know or if it's just to be polite but either way I'm taken aback by the question.

"To do something else, maybe talk?" I say.

A pin drop could be heard from a mile away with how quiet everything gets. I watch Hunter's jaw clench and unclench, his fist close and open, eyes avoiding me completely.

He stands up suddenly and his next set of words, I would never forget. "Look JJ, we're not boyfriends, partners or any of that. We fuck and that's it, you don't want to anymore and I'll find someone else." He shrugs on his leather cut and moves past me slamming the door in his wake on the way out.

The rules were clear when I jumped into this "friendship" so why I was fighting back the urge to punch something is beneath me. Crying is not really my thing and I'm not sure there's a gym open at this time so I do the next best thing.

Smash!! The mug skitters and shatters into pieces on the floor. That'll give me something to do while I process my feelings. And so I begin the cleanup of the mess both literally and metaphorically.