Imperfectly Yours (Zayn Malik Fanfiction- Sequel of SIMS)

Chapter Nineteen

Ever thought of calling when you've had a few?
'Cause I always do
Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new
Now I've thought it through
-Arctic Monkeys

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I woke up before dawn. Through the night my mind was rambling with thoughts and I just wanted to get up as soon as I could. I look down at the tangle of the grey duvet and our legs. I look to my left side, Zayn still sleeping.

 His right hand was beneath his head and his left was lightly holding my waist. It’s only a few times that I have seen him sleeping and every time my breath is caught in my throat looking at this beautiful man, who looks so guarded and powerful on the outside and looks like a small kiddo while sleeping.

I turn to face him completely. His hold on my wait becomes tight but he is still sleeping. His long inky hair falling on his face in a very natural way making him look so handsome. His lips parted and eyes curtained with those big eye lashes.

I trace my fingers on his face feeling the warmth which is making me hot and in need of him, lightly kissing his lips I pull way without making a noise. I decided to take a shower and make coffee for both of us.

We have too much to talk I hope everything will goes right.

I strip of when the water is hot enough to make me flinch. I stand in the hot stream of water thinking about how could this conversation probably go. We both assume things and never talk about them.

 We always do this and he always makes decisions without telling me or asking me. I always asked him to share things with me but he didn’t ever do so. I know he is scared about how I will react but he needs to tell me sometimes if not always.

And now he has ended up lying to me. This is something that I can’t let go.

The glass door slides and he enters inside. I don’t turn to look at him or don’t even react when his naked body hugs me from behind.

 His breathing was ragged and his body was hot and still.
He moves my hair to one side kissing my shoulder and I let him. His hands start to roam but I stop him from going any further. His hand stays still on my stomach.

“We need to talk.” My voice was small and unsettled.

“We have the whole day to talk.” Were his first words.

 “My emotions are not at bay Zayn.” He turns me around holding my hair and chin to make me look up at him.

“Mine too” his eyes were dark with so many emotions and fear is one of them.

 His jaw clenching and the veins on his neck are showing. I stare at him seeing his heart is also hurting like mine.

“Sex will not turn things right Zayn.” He closes his eyes still holding me in his steal grip. The water was so hot that his skin turns red, I know mine too has but we didn’t bother about it.

I touched his face, he opens his eyes which are pleading for so many things.

 “Hold me Faith. I need you.”

I hugged him instantly feeling his heartbeat is as fast as mine. His hold is tight on me like I will go away from him any moment.

Tears freely stream down my face, he inhales deeply in the crook of my neck but didn’t make any move to kiss me or touch me. We both our naked but the wall of differences is very strong.

***

We both sat on the carpet floor by the fireplace in the living room with coffee in our hands.

 Zayn was wearing a sweat shirt and bottoms looking his sexy self, I on the other hand was in grey leggings with a sweater.
 
He looks at me for a while when I was busy staring at the fire. He was guarded after our shower quickly after wearing his clothes he went downstairs and was smoking in the backyard.

“Tell me what is bothering you.” He said sipping his coffee.