Mrs. Sodol || KNJ✅

116

- Soyeon's POV -

Day five of our...cruise? If one can call this a cruise. The staff dodge me like I'm a walking plague, even JJ. When I come into a room it falls quiet or they step six feet away from me. It's dramatic. All I asked was for my space to be respected and they act like I'm the wicked witch of the west.

Can't say I love it here. But I do like some aspects.

The main one being the isolation. At sea there is nothing besides you, the fishes, and the rest of the world. And the rest of the world can't touch you. The air is fresher and the wind is a suffocating mom that doesn't stop petting your hair. I think this is the closest I've ever been to happy.

Namjoon: Enjoying yourself there?

Me: Yeah. Are there anymore...what are they called again?

Namjoon: Ocras?

Me: Yeah! Those!

Namjoon: *smiling* I don't think so.

He sat with me, a glass of scotch in hand. Seeing Namjoon dressed in something that isn't a suit and tie is like watching a dog walk on its hind legs. His hair was ruffled and the sun reflected off his sunglasses and shiny rolex on the same arm that held his drink.

The sun was setting and the wind was slowing with her. The sky was a painting of vibrant colors that twinkled over the ocean water.

Namjoon: I never thanked you. So, thanks.

Me: For what?

Namjoon: For saving me.

Me: You would've done the same for me. You did do the same for me.

Namjoon: I don't think you understand who I am, Soyeon. I'm very far from a savior.

Me: Don't do that.

Namjoon: Do what?

Me: That. Trying to downplay yourself to make yourself seem unapproachable. We are friends.

Namjoon: You don't want me as a friend, Soyeon.

Me: You. Are. My. Friend. Namjoon. Don't take that away from me. Please.

Namjoon: ...

Me: Sorry. I didn't mean to raise my voice.

Namjoon: What did I tell you about saying sorry?

Me: I'm working on it.

Namjoon: Come with me.

Me: Where are we going?

Namjoon: My cabin. I don't think we are having this conversation alone anymore.

Over his shoulder, two of the staff girls were eavesdropping. They weren't even trying to hide it. I hated the one in the navy. She was gawking at Namjoon like some creepy, senile, widowed grandma. Like close your mouth before you get flies, Karen.

Of course Namjoon had the biggest, darkest, and coolest room. He locked the door behind up and refilled his glass with another two fingers. He had a record player going, playing a Nat King Cole album.

Namjoon: Do you dance?

Me: Not very well.

Namjoon: Neither can I. Join me.

Me: Are you drunk?

Namjoon: Why would you think that? Come here.

Me: No. Wait. Let me come to you.

Namjoon: Alright.

A few deep breaths and awkward minutes of us staring at each other later, I found a grip on his hands. It wasn't so bad. He held mine back gently. Not squeezing but firm. And I felt that feeling. Like I was untouchable and shielded from everything bad in the world.

He spun me around, pulling me back to him by my sides and leading my hands to wrap around his shoulders. And we swayed. Namjoon let me lead the way, spinning me now and then before pulling me close again to hold me. He was so careful with me like I was a piece of glass.

Me: You're a liar. You can dance.

Namjoon: No, that's all you.

Me: *laughing* You're lying again!

Namjoon: Soyeon.

Me: Namjoon.

Namjoon: We can't be friends.

Me: Yes we can.

Namjoon: No, Soyeon. You have to understand-

Me: Do you not want to be my friend?

Namjoon: No. I don't.

His hands left my sides and cupped my face, lifting my eyes to meet his. Mine were watering, scared of what he was going to say. The hand that had the rolex wrapped around it combed through my hair before brushing my bottom lip.

Namjoon: *whispering* I want you too bad.

Our noses grazed as Namjoon leaned in closer to me. I closed my eyes, lord forgive me, praying for him to do it. He wiped away the tear that fell and connected our lips. He ignites something in me like he has some sort of super power.

I deepen the kiss, cupping up his neck. Nat King Cole sang to us in the background but got faded out as I melted into him. He was gentle but still, I could feel his control. I was his and he was mine.

We stumbled our way to the bed, Namjoon hovering over me. He gave me a single second to catch my breath and collided us again. My fingers twisted in his silky soft lock, feeling like a dream. He left my lips to pay attention to my neck, going straight for that little crook area that made me make that embarrassing laugh again while pinning my wrist down above my head.

Namjoon: *whispering* I fucking love it when you make that sound.

My legs squirmed the more he bit on that spot to hear me squeal again. He turned to the other side, grazing and nibbling on parts I didn't even know were sensitive. My breathing grew heavier as I got squirmier, trying to get more of him.

He held my wrist with one hand and the other reached down to his belt. The jingling of his buckle...

Suddenly I was back on that table. Screaming and crying with Ji-Tae's face looking down at me instead of Namjoon's. My eyes squeezed shut and when they opened, everything had stopped. Namjoon had pulled away and my heart was pounding painfully in my chest and it wasn't in the way that I wanted it to.

Me: I'm sorry I...dang it.

Namjoon: It's okay! It's okay.

Me: No it's not. I'm a spaz.

Namjoon: Look at me, princess. Take your time and I'll wait for you.

Me: You will?

Namjoon: Mhm. We have all the time in the world for ourselves.

He might have been okay with it but I wasn't. I wanted to grab him but the collar of his black, short sleeved, linen shirt and pulled him back to me. I'd do anything. Lose a finger, an eye, sell my soul, anything if it meant I could be able to feel him again.