Percabeth Betrayed

Two IMPORTANT Notices

Ok, so as I was rereading my story, I started to notice a few things. 

1. My writing is a bit amateur in the beginning I think. It's been a year, and my style has changed a bit. 

2. I feel like in the beginning, Jake is all like "oh I'm so amazing blah blah blah," and I feel like it's kinda out of nowhere. The story just kinda shoots off without a firm base. Also, because I'm writing in first person, shouldn't we kind of be aware of his plan from the very beginning?

3. Percy Jackson is loved by so many people because of the way Rick Riordan writes his relatable personality. I feel like I'm capturing his character well, but not as well as I should be.  

Don't worry, I'm not going to rewrite the story lol. I would never. But I am going through each chapter one by one and editing and rewriting and adding more detail and making it more relatable. The scenes will stay the same, but will be kind of half rewritten? I'll be doing this as I'm updating new chapters, so don't worry, you'll still get updates. 

I've already edited chapters 1-4. I recommend you reread to see what you think. Jake came on kind of sudden and strong originally, so I toned his character down a bit. He's still an egotistical idiot, but his pov is no longer just: "I'm amazing and this is why." He's still that, but a little more calm and calculating. Because, after all, he is sort of a spy. Chapter four also changed. A lot. But I think it's for the better. The original moment between Percy and Annabeth in that chapter was just too far fetched. This isn't Romeo and Juliet. So I changed it to something that hopefully stays a bit more true to their characters. 

Last thing. AND THIS IS IMPORTANT!!!!! I'm super interested in marine biology, and it's an option to become a serious career as I continue to move through school. I'm trying to support aquariums during the COVID-19 crisis, even ones that I've never been to. I found this one, called the Newhall Aquarium, that is seriously struggling to support itself. It has a gofundme going in order to raise money. So many people read this story, and I know that at least a 100 of you are reading this right now. If you all donate $5, just $5, we could easily make $500!!! I know that a lot of people are out of work right now, and it's hard to earn money, but, you know, it never hurts to do a good deed and help other people. Let me know in the comments if you donated! 

https://www.gofundme.com/f/local-aquarium-learning-center-needs-public039s-help?utm_source=customer&utm_campaign=p_cp+share-sheet&utm_medium=copy_link-tip 

That's all. Chapter 48 coming soon. 

Also, happy Father's Day to anyone out there who's a dad!