Loving You is My Greatest Sin

34- One Last Month

The sky in his world turns cloudy dark. The amount of his sorrow weighed on top of his chest, he can hardly breathe.

She is going to left him.

The yellow birds song suddenly sounds like an out of tunes melodies, torturing him even more. His body loses the last bit of energy, he can't even think about it. One month, one last month.

After she left they will be strangers at best, if not, then they will meet again as enemy. Jing lets out a sigh, smiling bitterly. The next time they meet will be the last day on earth for one of them.

If he can have just one wish, he would pray that she will be with him forever. He would even exchange her companion with anything he has. Just to be with her.

But he knows he won't, because she won't be happy. And.. it's not fair, he says, gritting his teeth.

"What do you want to do?" She asks, her voice is soft and weak, manifesting her inner voice.

Jing looks up at his wife. He doesn't know, honestly, this has never went through his mind before. One last month, what does he want to do with it.

He holds her hand. Trying to feel the warmth that was gone long ago.

"Cook for me, that dish that you were trying to make when our house got on fire."

"Cook?" She frowns, doesn't understand why he asks that.

"It was the moment where you first accepted me as your man." He explains slowly, the tears on his eyes starts piling, it was one of the happiest time, he doesn't care about the house being burnt, all he cares about is that his wife finally acknowledge him. It was the first time that she sees him not as an enemy, but as a person. A person that truly loves her with all his heart.

"Okay.. I will do it." Tao Ru agrees, she decided to make this last month meaningful.

"Pa! Ma!" A-Kan is running towards them, hugging his mother.

"Kan, what are you doing? Why are you not sleeping?"

The baby rubs his face on Tao Ru's chest, hugging her tightly. Seems like A-Kan could feel what is happening.

"Hey, go back to sleep."

"No!" He keeps on holding onto his mom, not wanting to let go. There is something inside him telling him not to.

"A-Kan, it's still the time to sleep, look, even the sun hasn't risen yet!"

"I want to be with mother!" His hug is getting tighter.

"Okay, then mother will sleep with you."

"And father?"

"Yes, we are all going back to sleep together."

His smile is so small and innocent, everyone that sees it would melt.

The bed is large and strong, the pink covers is decorated with cherry blossoms embroidery, a perfect one for spring. The traditional engraving on the bed gives a more luxurious feel.

That dawn, the family of three sleeps together, holding each other tightly. A moment like will forever be cherished in their memory, because all they have is a month. They have to use it to the fullest.

____

Tao Ru sits on the corner of the bed, watching her son and husband sleeping. Her eyes are teary and red, "is she making the right decision?", She thinks. She bits her lower lip, taking a deep breath.

Her husband is hugging their only son, the future of Huang Ma Clan. They look so peaceful while sleeping. Tao Ru couldn't help it anymore, she needs to go before she changes her mind. She tucks her husband under the blanket, keeping him warm. A sheer smile blooms on her lips.

"I have to cook for them."

Being the wife of the most important figure in the manor means that she has royal-like advantages. Dozen of maids are always ready to serve them at all times. Including food preparation and serving. This is the first time for her to enter the manor's main kitchen.

"Lady Li." A servant greets her with a bow and quickly informs the others of her arrival.

Tao Ru nods, acknowledging them. She is looking around at the grand kitchen, as the servant cleans up the place. It is surely big, with many kitchen staff working to serve hundreds of disciples daily.

"I need some greens and a whole chicken."

"Yes, Lady Li."

Tao Ru is nowhere near the level of the skillful kitchen staffs of Huang Ma Clan. She still needs some help.

"Lady Li, what do you want to do with the chicken?"

"Just boil it, to make a broth."

"What else should I put alongside with the chicken?"

Tao Ru stops and raises her eyebrows, "What do you mean?"

"Ginger, salt, green onion.. what does Lady Li wants to put in?"

"I need to put something else?" Tao Ru is clearly foreign with cooking, it can clearly be seen in her confused face.

"Yes."

"J-just put anything then."

After a solid hour of cooking and being confused, her dish finally finished. Tao Ru wipes off the sweats on her forehead and lets out a proud sigh. She looks at the bowl in front of her with a smile, she cooks for them with her whole heart and soul poured into the special chicken dish.

Jing and A-Kan is already sitting on the room dining table when Tao Ru and the servant enters the room.

"Mother is cooking today!" The kid exclaims happily.

Jing smiles widely, his eyes is glued on his wife. Moment like this is the reason he is alive, living with her is not a big thing, but a million tiny happiness like this.

"Here, let mother help you out." Tao Ru serves a portion to A-Kan and then to Jing.

"Thank you mother."

"You are welcome my love." She pinches his cheeks playfully.

"Thank you." Jing says sincerely, the smile on his lips is blooming, his eyes sparkles as he looks at his wife with gentle look. Just like this, his heart is full.

"For everything that you have done." He nods slightly at her, giving her respect as a fighter.