Chapter 11:

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Beck's POV:
I missed her. She was only a couple doors down, and had only been asleep for about 3 hours. But I missed her. I was busy taking looking at the files of the other prisoners who had been kept with Lexi. Deciding whether or not they could be useful pack members, were a threat or deserved a trial. I was in the middle of reading the file of a 17 year old boy who could potentially be a good pack warrior, when my door opened. Will stepped in and took a seat at my desk.
"Beck we have to decide what to do about the guards. They're getting restless not being able to shift. We could have a lot of very angry, very strong wolves in not a lot of space."
I nodded and sighed, rubbing my hands over my face. "I know. I know. I just don't want to rush her or push her away. She's going to have to go through each guard and tell a room full of people, how they abused her. That's a lot of pressure to put on an already fragile person."
"Maybe you can talk to her about the lower ranking guards in private, and then we can be present for the big guys like Logan?"
"Yeah that could work. I'll talk to her and see what she thinks. Thanks Will." He nodded and shook my hand before leaving. I turned back to the file and jotted down a few notes. I was just about done when I heard feet padding on the hardwood of the hallway. I smiled, figuring it was Lex. She stepped in and sat in a chair in front of my desk. I glanced up from my file, and did a double take.
Gianna. "Gianna, what the fuck are you doing in here?" I growled, pissed that she wasn't getting the message.
"Just visiting I suppose." She said, smirking and batting her eyelashes.
"Leave. Now." I said through gritted teeth.
"Ya know I was thinking earlier... I miss us, what we used to do."
"Gianna there was never an us. You were just good in bed and eager to please, nothing more."
"Well I'm still eager to please."
"And I'm not interested! I have a mate that you could never compare to!"
"Seriously Beck?! You don't love her! You never even wanted a mate! She doesn't know you like I do! She's a child! Nothing more!" She shrieked.
"Gianna-" she got up and walked around my desk to stand in front of me.
"Shhhhhh. She doesn't know what you like, or how you like it. But I do...let me help you. You must be tense and frustrated." She murmured and climbed onto my lap. I tried to push her off of me, but she wrapped her arms around my neck and I felt her nails, digging into my skin. Quickly her lips were on mine and she was pushing her tongue into my mouth. I groaned and tried to push her away again. Gianna took that as a groan in pleasure and began to grind herself against me.
I heard a whimper at the door and my head snapped to the side. Shit. Alexia stood in the door way, tears filling her eyes. She sniffled, turned and slammed the door.
"Lexie! Wait! Baby!" I called, shoving Gianna of my lap. "You bitch! Get off my land! You are banished from this pack! Gianna Foster you now have the status of a rogue, and have been stripped of the title as a Black Mist pack member. Pack your things and leave within the hour or you will be killed. That is a promise not the threat."
I ran down the hall to me and Lexie's room, only to find the door locked. I could hear her sobs from the other side of the door, and my heart broke with each one.
"Alexia, sweetheart, open the door. Please. I'm so so sorry princess." I knocked lightly. "Let me in baby. Let me explain. It's not what you think." I heard her get up off the bed and walk to the door.
"Beck please, please leave me alone." She whispered.
"Lex, please let me explain myself. I never meant for that to happen. This is all just a big misunderstanding," I said leaning my head against the door. Shit. I had really screwed up. Suddenly the door was yanked open from under my head, and a very angry little girl stood in front of me.
"Then. Tell. Me." She said, annunciating, each word. "Look me in the eye and tell me I did not just see you with some perky blonde on your lap, kissing you. Tell me is that or is that not what I saw."
I hung my head, "Yes," I whispered, "But honestly, Lexie, she came onto me..."
"Were you pushing her away?!"
"I tried to but-"
"You tried to? Beck you're the goddamned Alpha, if you had really wanted to, you could have!"
"Please, please listen to me. I told you she's nothing to me! I hate her! I only want you baby, it all just happened so fast I-"
"She was right."
"No baby what are you talking about?"
"You never wanted a mate."
"Alexia- no..."
"Why would you want me?"
"Alexia you're perfect of course I want you..."
"Clearly you didn't."
"Lex please don't-"
"Was it just a game to you? Did you actually care? Or was it just to look good for your pack?"
"Alexia! No I only wanted you and to make you happy! I care about you, you and only you. Why can't you see that?"
"Why can't I see that? You sure have a funny way of showing it!" She sighed,cracking a deep breath. "Beck I need space and time. I can't even look at you right now."
"Lexie, no you can't leave me! Please I'm so so so sorry! This will never happen again! I promise you!"
"I'm not leaving you. I don't think I could. But I can't do this right now." And tried to step around me. I stuck out my arms, trying to block the door. "Please Beck. Let me go. I just need time." I sighed and my head dropped and I stepped aside. She walked by me, down the hall into one of the guest rooms and shut the door, locking it behind her.
I walked into my room and sat at the edge of my bed. I was shaking and my head was pounding. Leo was pacing around in my head, arguing with me.
"You are such a fucking idiot."
"I know."
"She better forgive you, or so help me god I will end you."
"I know."
"Go make this right! Get our mate back! What are you doing?"
"She doesn't want me, she has to come to terms with this."
"If you so much as look at another she-wolf..."
"Yeah I get it."
"What if she rejects you?"
"I deserve it."
"Can we go eat the tramp?"
"No she's gone already."
"I can't even fucking believe you-" he cut me off then,leaving me alone.
I paced my room, and found her scent to be too overwhelming there. I walked to my office. And punched a hole straight through the wall. I could here Alexia crying from a few rooms over. Jesus, Lexie I'm so so sorry.
************ 1 week later **************
Beck's POV:
It's been 1 week. 1 week since I've spoken to my mate. 1 week since I held her close to me. She let me in three times a day to bring her food. But I could tell she was barely eating. And it was all my fault. Some days she only took a bite or two. She was going to be just as bad as when she was in the prisons. I had sent Will to check her gashes and apparently with the lack of nutrition, they had stopped healing.
She had woken up in the middle of the night one night, screaming. I knew she was having a nightmare. I grabbed the bottle of pills and went to her door. i wanted nothing moore than to hold her, but I knew she would push me away. I walked over to her bed and stood over her. She took the bottle from me, took a pill and placed it on the nightstand, and rolled over. She had been pale and thin. I had to fix this and soon.
I knew I had to fix this. I mind linked Will and told him to come to my office.
"Alpha?"
"Will, I need her back. She'll listen to you, she lets you in, talks to you. Can you please, please say something to her?"
"Sure." He left and I heard a soft knock on her door.
"Hey Lex, can we talk?" And then I heard the door close. Will was my best friend and I couldn't ask for a better beta. Twenty minutes later I heard, "Ok I'll tell him." And I heard the door close. Will walked back into my office.
"She listened to me. She didn't say much. But I could tell what I was saying was hitting home." He said.
"What did you say to her?"
"I told her that you were a good guy and that you were raised to cherish a mate. That you would never intentionally hurt her, you would never cheat on her. Not by choice. That it was killing you. That I had never seen you so happy and such a strong leader, and good brother since she showed up. And I told her to just listen to you, and think about forgiving you. I told her she had to be feeling the effects of being away from you. She whimpered and I knew I had to be right." My heart soared.
"Thanks Will, really man I appreciate it. I'm gonna go talk to her."
"Oh and Beck she needs you to refill the prescription for the sleeping pills."
"What?"
"She doesn't have anymore pills."
"That prescription was supposed to last her a month. It's been a week..."
"Shit."
I hurried down the hallway to her room. She laid in bed, facing the wall.
"Lex?" No response. "Alexia look at me." She ignored me. "Where are the pills?"
"I took them." She whispered still facing the wall.
"All of them?!"
"Almost."
"Alexia! You can't do that! Are you trying to kill yourself?!" She turned to look at me bewildered. Her eyes were red and her cheeks were tearstained.
"N-no I just wanted to escape. They made me forget for a while." She murmured. I turned on my heel and rushed down to the medical wing.
"Blake!!! I need you!"
"What's up Alpha?"
"Alexia- she, she took all the pills. She needs more."
"All at once?!" I shook my head.
"No in the past week."
"Jesus, if she were a human she'd be dead. She's lucky. But I'm cutting her off. No more. She can't be trusted. And I can't give her more. She could overdose or become addicted." I nodded in thanks and left.
I ran back upstairs to Alexia's room. She looked at me hopeful. "No more. No more pills. You could have killed yourself. If you had taken one too many and I had lost you- do you know what would have happened? I would have crumbled. I would have killed myself. I'm sorry sweetheart. They were a temporary fix but you have to overcome this differently- without the meds.' She nodded once and turned back to face the wall. I sighed and went back to my room to bed.
************ Alexia's POV: *************
I shot up in bed, my heart pounding and sweat pouring down my face. I was breathing heavily and I knew it had been a nightmare. I pressed a cold hand to the back of my neck. There was a loud clap of thunder and I jumped. I could hear the rain pouring outside and down on to the roof. I felt my body start to panic and hyperventilate. I had never liked thunder storms, they killed me. I always needed the comfort of someone else during a storm.
The past week had been hell. I craved his presence night and day. I cried constantly. I kept taking pill so I could sleep and wouldn't have to feel anything or think about him. i kept myself away for seven days, but I didn't know how much longer I would last.
I needed Beck. I wanted Beck. I wanted his warmth and his soothing words. I felt the tears run down my face. I untangled my legs from the comforter and clambered out of bed. I crept to the door and pulled it open softly. His door was slightly ajar and I walked down the hall quietly. I pushed open his door. He was sleeping on his side, his breathing deep and slow.
I tiptoed to the edge of his bed and pulled back the covers, climbing in gently. He still must have heard me or felt me moving, because he turned to look at me peeking one eye open.
"Lex? What are you doing in here?" He said in his tired voice.
"I'm so sorry!" I sobbed and threw my arms around his neck. "I should have just forgiven you and gotten over it! I'm so sorry!"
"Oh sweetheart shhhh it's ok. You have nothing to be sorry for. You were right to be mad at me. I'm the one that is sorry. Shhhh don't cry. It's ok. Everything's ok." He murmured wiping my tears.
"Im an awful mate." I choked out and cried harder.
"Hey hey, don't say that! You're a wonderful mate. You have a right to get mad at me," I looked down, "I was mad at me to. I'm so sorry Lex."
"I forgive you." I whispered, and new in my heart that I did. Just then the thunder boomed again and I held him tighter.
"You're afraid of thunderstorms aren't you?" I nodded meekly, sniffling.
"Come here, I've got you. Your safe baby," he whispered in my ear, kissing my neck and wrapping his arms around my waist. "Sleep, princess. I'm here now." I buried my face into his chest and felt his warmth envelope me. Soon my tears stoppeed and I was deep in the best sleep I had been in all week.

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