Die A Little

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

I had been living with Brian for a couple of weeks now, and at first, it was great. We were as close as we had ever been and I loved living with the boy, but...things began to fall apart when it came down to the discussion of money. We had both agreed to pay half of the rent and take it in turns for everything else, such as groceries and dinners out. That Friday night was no different either.

"Brian, you paid last time, it's my turn!" I shouted from the bathroom after having just gotten out of the shower.

My hair was wet and fell down in front of my eyes and my towel was wrapped loosely around my waist. The mirror was steamed up from the shower as I took the comb in my hand and raked the plastic through my hair just to get it out of my eyes. I could hear the bathroom door open from beside me as I turned to find Brian clad in his jeans and his shirt half-buttoned, still in the middle of getting dressed for our night out together.

"No, it's my turn to pay." He argued. "Just quit being a pain in my ass and get ready, we're going to be late for our dinner reservations and then we'll miss Joey's party."

I didn't like his rough tone with me as I cocked a questioning brow at the boy. He rolled his eyes. "What have I done wrong now?"

"Who's gotten your panties in a twist?" I questioned.

"Nothing." Brian shrugged huffily. "Just hurry up, will you?"

"Why are you being so shitty with me?"

"I'm not." Brian denied, shaking his head.

"Yes, you are." I corrected irritably and folded my arms across my chest. "Spill it."

"Nothing's happened, Sal!" Brian raised his voice and his face was one of thunder.

"Clearly something is up your ass." I commented back acerbically, scoffing.

"You want to know what's up, Sal?" He asked rhetorically. "I'll tell you."

I looked at him; the boy was unable to bring his eyes to lock onto mine. "I feel suffocated here."

"What do you mean?"

"I love you, but this whole living together thing isn't what I was expecting it to be." Brian admitted. "You're always around and I never get any time to myself. I love that you're clingy and want to be around me as much as you can, but a guy needs a break every now and again, you know?"

"No." I answered back, hiding the hurt in my voice. "I don't know, Brian."

I pushed by him and headed for the bedroom to at least get some clothes on. I pulled my jeans on and buckled the belt before finding a shirt and throwing the cotton over my head and down my front. Brian had followed after me and was stood in the doorway, just watching me. "I thought that's what you wanted; you hate being alone."

"Sometimes I just need a break, Sal." He revealed. "I need time to clear my head and escape from reality for a bit."

"Fine." I accepted frustratedly. "I'll just move out."

"You know that's not what I meant," Brian sighed heavily. "Don't twist my words, Sal."

"I'm not twisting anything, Brian." I replied. "I'm just doing what you want, because as always, it's your way or the highway."

"What's that supposed to mean?" He glowered. "I knew I shouldn't have mentioned anything."

"No, I'm glad that you did." I commented. "Don't worry, after tonight's party I'll pack up my things and be out of your hair by morning."

"Why are you acting like this?" Brian questioned. "All I said was that I just needed some time to myself sometimes."

"Because, Brian," I began to explain. "Do you realise how much that hurts to hear? All I've ever done is be there for you and I still do it wrong."

I reached for my wallet and keys, stuffing them into my back pockets. "It's like I can't win with you."

"If anyone can't win here, it's me!" He protested, noticing the doubtful look across my face. "Don't give me that look, you know it's true."

"You seem to forget that you have controlled every part of this relationship, Brian." I reminded. "We always went at your pace and nothing I ever said was taken into consideration."

"Bull. Shit." Brian disputed bluntly. "I listened to you."

"Maybe once." I shrugged.

Peering down to his watch, Brian sighed frustratedly and grumbled. "We've missed our reservation now."

"I suppose that that's my fault too, huh?" I complained.

"Don't put words in my mouth." He muttered.

"I know you were thinking it though." I pointed out. "Are we going to this damn party or not?"

"Get in the fucking car." Brian ordered, not without adding a snide comment as we were locking up the apartment. "Don't know why you're even going, you hate Joey."

"Perhaps because he beat me up more than once, but continue." I quipped.

"You're a pain in my ass, Sal, really." He scowled.

"Good." I growled.

Sitting in the car, neither of us were talking. Brian held onto the steering wheel tightly; pure fury across his features under the moonlight. He drove us over to Joey's place at the top of the hill and parked up outside amongst the other cars that crowded the driveway. Brian and I climbed out of the vehicle, walking in silence up to the front door. He raised his fist to the wood and rapped twice; the sound of music came from inside the home. The front door was soon pulled open as Joey opened his arms in celebration.

"Ay, you guys made it!" He exclaimed, gesturing with his hand. "Come in, come in!"

Brian stepped in first as I followed in afterwards. Joey leaned in closer to whisper to me. "No hard feelings about what went on at school, Dude."

I faked a smile, lost on a response to his words. What was I supposed to say to the person who beat me up so hard that my ribs were cracked and I could barely walk without an obvious limp? Thank you?

The house was filled with past students of Monsignor Farrell High School as Brian and I weaved through the crowds, feeling as though ten-thousand eyes were burning into us. Surprisingly, people weren't shouting things like they used to do in the hallways, soon returning their attention back onto having a good night out. We made it to the kitchen as Brian grabbed a beer, immediately opening the top and taking a sip.

"Starting early, I see." I commented under my breath, receiving a glare in return.

"It's called having fun, Sal, ever heard of it?" Brian shot back, pushing passed me and heading for the door to join the partygoers in the living room.

I sighed heavily and leaned back against the kitchen counter, running a hand through my hair. This was meant to be our special night out, but instead we were arguing over something that could have been avoided. I felt like Brian hated me and who am I to blame him? I guess I had been a little dramatic over the whole thing, but I cared about him so much, it just hurt to hear that it was too much for him.