Adventures of Jessa

26

"Jessa, we will be in Silva tonight, soon we will part. Will you tell me what's wrong? Is there anything I can do to help you?" Jessa had been unusually quiet since her lessons with Alaric the day she was hired by the caravan master with Nathan.

Jessa pulls Dhiren into a secluded spot and makes sure that their conversation is private, "I think it would be better for you to not continue courting me, Dhiren." Jessa says more than a little sadly.

"What? Why, have I done something to hurt or offend you?" Dhiren demands. He's more than a little sick at her words. He finds the idea of saying goodbye to her less than pleasant for the short term, saying goodbye permanently makes him ill.

"Alaric informed me that if I ever gained my dragon form that I would be expected to fly and mate with a gold dragon. They are too few to not have a young female fly and have baby dragons. As the princess it is my duty," Jessa is more than a little bitter about this duty. "I will not be able to let my people down, even if the only ones I know are the ones there in Castlerock and I don't even know all of them."

"I understand all about duty and doing something unpleasant because of it." Dhiren tells her, he wants to tell her that he knew about her duty, but didn't know how to tell her without her getting upset.

"You knew, didn't you?" Jessa states as she looks at him, unsure if she should be angry or relieved.

"Yes, he had told me earlier that day. I had asked him if he had informed you of it yet and he admitted to me that he hadn't. I told him that wasn't fair to you and that he needs to tell you, prepare you." Dhiren tells her and pulls her into his arms.

"I can't be your wife and still fly gold dragons, Dhiren. That's not fair to you or your people."

Dhiren doesn't like her words and kisses her to stop her from speaking. "I told Alaric that I needed to think about what he told me before I could make a decision about continuing courting you or letting you go. He was pleased that I didn't just make a declaration. The thought of letting you go makes me ill."

"And what does me mating with another make you?" Jessa demands.

"I am less than pleased, Jessa. I don't like sharing, as we both made clear to the other. I just need to make sure that I won't lose it completely if you do shift forms. I want you to have the best, even if that isn't me. I want what will make you happy."

"But what about your happiness, Dhiren? What will make you happy?"

"I don't know yet, have you decided that you will be happier with me not courting you? If so then I will stop now."

"How can I make that decision when you haven't figured out if you can handle me flying another male? I know if it would make you jealous and angry, make you upset and bitter about being with me when I have to be with another even after the banns are read and the marriage performed, I would say let me go. The bitterness, anger and jealousy would turn your feelings towards me to hate and I could not stay with you if you hate me."

"Jessa," Dhiren tries to say but Jessa lowers the spell and returns to her duties of ranging ahead.

Dhiren soon loses sight of her and sullenly returns to the slowly moving caravan. It doesn't take long for the rest of his guard to show up and take defensive positions around him but slightly out from the caravan to give him some privacy.

Nathan looks at the dejected elven prince and makes his way to him. "Are you alright, Your Highness?"

Dhiren shakes himself from his depressing thoughts. "What?"

"I asked if you were alright? Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Not unless you can change the race of a person?" Dhiren says more than a little bitterly.