infatuation | s.r

eighteen

a/n: TWO UPDATES? IN ONE DAY? who is she 🙈

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4 days. it had been 4 days since you spoke to spencer.

the bruises had faded, covering them up was easy, but explaining to the team why you were wearing a scarf was not as easy.

he's apologized to you multiple times , you were mad at him. just upset , you never expected anything like that from spencer. it scared you.

you walked into the bullpen, walking over to your desk, setting your bag down and walking to the break room to get coffee.

you walk in to spencer at the table with his head in his hand. you frown at the sight , and walk over , sitting in the chair next to him.

you place your hand on the small of his back and you see him turn to look at you , eyes widening when he sees you.

you give him a small smile , and he gives you a small smile back.

his eyes are red and puffy , he's been crying. his hair messy and his lips chapped and dry, he looked broken.

"y/n, i- i'm so sorry, i miss you so much , i'm so so sorry." he rambles out , tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

you wrap your hands around his neck, pulling his body into you , running your fingers through his hair.

spencer tenses, but relaxes, and wraps his hands around your torso, sniffling.

"it's okay spence, i was just scared." you admit, and he shudders.

"i-i'm sorry , i thought i lost you , i c-can't lose you y/n, i'm sorry." he breathes out.

"hey, i'm not going anywhere , okay?" you pull back from him, looking in his eyes.

he nods , pulling your body back into his.

"i missed you , so much." he says, and you feel your stomach flip.

"i missed you too, spence." you reply.

"next time something is wrong , we talk about it , okay?" you ask and he nods.

"i promise, i'll never hurt you again pretty girl, i cant lose you. those were the worst 4 days of my life." he laughs dryly.

you pull back, smoothing his hair. you two look at each other, your stomach begins to flip, and you feel your heartbeat in your chest, spencer's eyes flick back from your eyes to your lips , you lean in, lips inches from each others.

"is the coffee done?" you hear morgan, you and spencer quickly pull away from each other, spencer starting a random conversation about physics.

you almost kissed. spencer has only ever kissed you once. hmm. why doesn't he kiss you ?

•••

you all sit in the briefing room. it was a brutal case.

6 females killed, and one missing .

they were all gutted , and shot right in between the eyes. it was gruesome , and the unsub would always kidnap, and torture them before the execution shot , hence the gutting.

you were going to new mexico, so you all grabbed your go bags and headed to the jet.

you all board the jet , it was a 5 hour flight, so everyone but you and spencer decided to sleep, but you and spencer decided to talk about the situation more.

"talk to me , spence." you say, and his tired eyes find yours.

you reach your hand out to his and he takes it , you interlacing fingers. giving his hand a reassuring squeeze , before he sighs and begins to talk.

"it was the case , it got to me , i felt the same pain that he was feeling , i was bullied, but you already knew that. it just hurt, no one deserves that pain , y/n. no one. and it upset me , because i knew how he felt , but i just handled it better than he did. and then, i needed to take my anger out on something. so i took it out on you , and that wasn't fair." he pauses , looking at your eyes , you smiling , he continues.

"a-and i thought i lost you, and that broke me , i could never lose you , you're the only person who truly understands me , i look forward to seeing you , i can only sleep if i'm holding you , you make me feel so safe , and i lo-"

he freezes. mouth forming a tight line, thinking of his next sentence.

"and i love being with you , you're the most amazing best friend i could ever ask for."

there is was. best friend.

you feel your stomach drop a little , it's not like you were expecting him to catch feelings or anything, that would be silly.

"i-i'm just so sorry , you didn't deserve it , and i'm so so sorry that i put your in pain." spencer says, squeezing your hand.

"spence , it's okay, i forgive you. i was just scared , i never expected that out of you and it caught me off guard. but it's okay, i understand." you smile at him.

"and i love being with you too spencer, you make me feel safe , and i would never ever let that go." you say, and he leans forward and presses his forehead to yours.

"i'm sleepy." he says, and you smile.

"me too, let's take a nap, spence." you say back, and he nods, adjusting his body so that your head can rest on his shoulder , his hand never leaves yours.

you both begin to nod off, the white noise of the plane and the feeling of each other's bodies relaxing both. you hear spencer stir.

"y/n.." he mumbles, you don't think he knows he's talking.

"yes spence?"

"i didn't mean the best friend part , you're so much more, i dream about it all the time.. just like i am right now." he has a grin on his face, and his words slur.

you heart stops, and you're lost for words.

"okay spence." you say, and before you can even respond , his lips are parted and little snores are leaving his lips.

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AHHHH this one is shorter, but i couldn't leave y'all hanging , so here ya go :)