Chapter 41

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After 2 days I finally got some courage to get up from the bed. I feel quite weak as my energy got drained in these 2 days. My fever has subsided now. I go and I take a shower . As the water trickled down my body , I closed my eyes to reboot my brain which was just thinking about the pain which my mother had suffered. After the shower I ate some Crunchy Muesli ( A combination of oats with almonds, raisins and honey). Then I sat on my study table for a few minutes then I decided to clean up my cloth cupboard and book rack .

After 3 hours my whole room got finally cleaned up. I was exhausted by now but I guess channelizing my pain and anger into positive energy is the best way to cope up with this situation . I see the clock it is 2 o' clock ,my stomach is growling with hunger so I go to the kitchen to fill my tummy . I see my mom has tears in her eyes , I hurried to my mom and I realised she was cutting onions .

My mom hugged me when she saw me standing on my feet after 2 days. Then my mom gave me food . She gave me fried rice and garlic sauce. I ate it quietly. Today even tasty fried rice is not uplifting my mood. Then I go to my coaching and I pay full attention to the lecture . Then I , Chirag, Cherry , Taniya and a few other students of my batch attended the extra classes of coaching to cover the backlog which we all missed due to midterm examinations.

After 3 hours of lecture we were like zombie deprived of vigour and ready to bite anyone like dead zombies. I am in no mood to talk to anyone . Cherry and Taniya understood my sour mood and they gave me space but Chirag was trying to know what is  the reason behind my bad mood. I was getting irritated when Chirag tried to make my mood light by his silly jokes.

Argh...I can't tell anyone about the crisis situation at my home and this is  making me angry and suffocated. After lecture Cherry, Taniya and Chirag planned to go out for coffee . But  I refused to go because I don't feel  like hanging out with anyone not even Chirag.

As I was about to leave for home . Chirag stood infront of my scooty . This fumed me to another level and I erupted " Chirag get out of  my way ! Stop irritating me . Get away or else I will ignite the engine and I will trample your leg". Chirag smiled " My love anger makes you look much more beautiful". I exclaimed " Chirag enough is enough ! You are getting on my nerves now. Stop it ". Then I had a meltdown right there . Chirag came by my  side and he tried to pacify me . I tried to push him away but instead I lost my balance in the process and I starting slipping backwards but then Chirag held my hand to prevent me from falling backwards.

With his support I straightened my back again . I shrugged his hand away with a  jerk . Then I tried to start my scooty but then Chirag punctured the tyre with a geometry compass. Argh....this boy is driving me crazy . I shouted " What the heck ! Chirag I will kill you today!". Chirag stick his tongue out and said " You already stole my heart now I wanno  see what else you can do to me my love ". I was infuriated so I ran after Chirag and I chased him but then I hit something . Argh....in chasing Chirag , I crashed with our strict professor Mr. Aniket Sharma .

I mumbled a quick sorry to the professor .But Sharma Sir glared me and thundered " These days students have forgotten all their manners . Both of you are creating ruckus here even  when your lectures got over. Now give your parents  number to me, I will call them here and I will tell them what their children are doing here  instead of studying" .

Argh....my dad will kill me if he gets a complaint call from coaching. Fear clenched my heart and my forehead had sweat beats .Both Chirag and me pleaded in unison " Sorry sir , we don't do it again sir ". After a lot of pleadings Sharma sir calmed down but he warned us " My eyes will be on both of  you. I will now personally keep a track on your test records  of coaching . So, be careful now as I won't take any indiscipline and nuisance in coaching . Is that very clear! Now go home right now your parents must be worried for you both". Chirag and I nodded our heads .

As Sharma sir went away we took a sigh of relief . I then glared Chirag and I thundered" Chirag you punctured my scooty . Now how will I  go home as Cherry and Taniya has already left and I will get no autorickshaw at this time ". Chirag said in a serious tone" I am sorry I will drop you home". I answered " No need I will manage on my own as I am independent and I don't need you  to safe guard me ". Chirag was shocked by my statement but he hid his shock and said" It's 7:30 in the evening , you won't get any vehicle to travel .It's not safe for you to be all alone in the city after sunset . So, let me drop you, I assure you that I will not trouble you now ".

Argh...Chirag is right I can't go on my own . If  he  asks anything about my behaviour  change  then  I  will stay quiet .Avoiding  him will be good as I can't answer his questions . I sat on his Bukki and shivers ran down my spine. His proximity makes me crazy . As Chirag was riding bukki he asked me " Diya what is hurting you , I can help you . Tell me". Is your father troubling you ,tell me ? ", Chirag kept asking me but  I  kept mum . At last he lost his cool . He stopped his bike and confronted me " Where were you from the last 2 days? Is your Dad behind this . If your dad is behind it I will fix him!'. I shouted " Don't you  dare  talk bad about my  father . No matter how my father treats me , I will not listen a word against him because he is the one who gave me life , so I won't take any rubbish regarding him ".

Then my breath was uneven . Argh....I am getting another panic attack . Chirag calmed me down by kissing my forehead and cheek .I calmed down a bit but then Chirag looked into my eyes .His  eyes turned a shade darker . Chirag started leaning against my face, I closed my eyes but then I remembered what my dad did  to my mom. So, I pushed Chirag away and I slapped him hard . Argh...all men are same  full of lust. Now I cannot trust men what if Chirag takes advantage of me just like my father who took away self respect of my mom, I thought to myself.

I started walking on my feet to reach home but then Chirag stopped me saying" Diya I will drop you as your  home is still  far away from here. I am sorry I tried to come closer to you .I should have taken your consent first ". These words made a pang on my heart but then my brain shouted " He is just  acting to be good and innocent". Chirag  then  requested me  to come back. I saw there was no transport on the empty road so, I sat on the bike but this time I maintained some distance between me and him .

As we reached my house , I got down from Bukki and I started moving towards my house entrance . Chirag called my name from behind but I didn't look back . I just kept walking like a robot as tears  were trickling down my face. I guess I have started to develop trust issues with men. I can't see Chirag  in  pain . So, I have decided to slowly drift away from Chirag.

I went to my room. I washed my tear stained face .Then I cried my heart out in the pillow .I refused dinner  sighting  headache  to  my mom  but  in actual my heart is aching but I can't share this with my mom because she is already a troubled soul these days . I kept crying until sunrise , I didn't sleep even  for a second in the night so now I felt drowsy and sleepy so I decided to skip school today although  I already  took sick leave for 2 days from school due to fever but  now today I  have no energy to attend school . I switched off my phone then I closed my eyes .  I drifted  to  empty  dreamless  sleep.

*******CHAPTER   ENDS************

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