unconventional

Back to 'Normal'

I sat inside my trailer later that day, just flipping throught my script and waiting for someone to come and get me for my scene.

A soft knock at the door caught my attention, knowing it was probably Lily I muttered a come in. But Sarah walked in, obviously nervous.

"Oh, hey." I say looking up at the woman.

"Hey, I just figured we should talk." She says walking further into the room, fiddling with her fingers in front of her body. "Can I sit?"

"Yeah, of course." I motion to the chair in front of me, she sits down and shows me a small smile. I close my script and focus my full attention on her.

"So, it's been awhile since we've...you know." I nod. "And I don't know things have just been weird, no?" I nod again. "Are you mute or something?" She asks with a small smile on her face.

"No, I just don't really know what to say. I'm not really sure what you want to talk about." I say honestly, she nods looking down at her hands. "I like you Sarah," she looks up, her eyes meeting mine. "but I don't like the way I feel when i'm with you."

"What do yo-"

"I know that you have a girlfriend, and our relationship is strange, to say the least, but I don't like this whole texting me when you want to have sex thing and then kicking me out when we're done."

It's silent for a moment, I can tell she's taken aback by my unbridled honesty. I look out the window, feeling my eyes start to burn and my throat begin to tighten.

"I'm so sorry." My eyes snap back to hers. "You're right, I shouldn't have made you feel like that, I should've checked before I put you in that type of position. I'm sorry." She reaches across the table, her hand softly covering mine.

"It's okay, I mean i'm fine but it just wasn't a very nice feeling." A beat of silence passes with us simply looking at one another.

"I missed you, Scout. I really do not like it when you're angry with me."

"I missed you too, Sarah."

"And I promise that our together is means more to me than I made it seem, really."

The door swings open to reveal a rather disheveled looking Lily Rabe. "I have been waiting around for the two of you for like 20 minutes."

"Sorry we were chatting."

"Well, let's go bitches we have a show to film."

_________________________________

"But," Dianna starts sitting up from her bed. "isn't everything just gonna go back to the way that it was? Her texting you at night, you giving in and then that just repeats over and over again until you finally snap and hit someone with your car?"

"I mean I hope not, I just got a new car." She rolls her eyes while I giggle to myself.

"I think she should just break up with her girlfriend and call it a day."

"Well, I do too but we can't always get what we want Dianna. Sometimes we're just stuck being the hot, young, mistress and there isn't anything we can do about it." I say getting up from her bed and heading towards the door.

"So you admit that you're a mistress then?" She yells out after me, I flip my middle finger up before closing the door behind me.

_________________________________

"Am I technically your mistress?" I ask Sarah, who nearly spits out her drink.

She asked me if I wanted to come over and have lunch today since we got done on set early, and I actually said yes.

"What are you talking about?" She asks as I wipe up the few splotches of liquid that landed on the table.

"I mean I know you guys aren't married, and she's not a man but am I still technically a mistress?"

"Uhm, no. You're not a mistress, Scout." Thinking for a second, I see a smile come to her face. "You're an inamorata."

"Okay, now you're just making up words."

"No, i'm not." She laughs slightly, leaning forward and taking my hand into hers. "You're my female lover."

"Gee thanks, that makes me feel great." I say with a small smile. She laughs, pressing a kiss to the side of my head.

I wanted to ask why she wouldn't just break up with Holland if she wasn't happy with her, but i'm not sure I wanted to hear the answer.

I still have this little shred of hope that one day she'll bang on my door in the rain and declare her love to me in the middle of the night, and then we'll live happily ever after.

Even though it's unrealistic, a girl can only dream.