Everything & More (Book 1 in the E.C.N Series)

Chapter 28-Jonathan

"Jonathan!"

It's like she times this shit.

Irritation crawled up my spine as I waited for the elevator. The owner of the voice was making their way down the hall. The clicks of heels got louder with each step. All I could do was pray that this elevator would come faster. The footsteps stopped beside me and turned in my direction. My face stayed focused on the steel door of the elevator as I stared at my warped reflection.

When she finally spoke, I realized she was way too close for comfort. "Where are you headed?"

"Home." I said as I turned her way and took a subtle step back. My eyes casted down as I noticed what she was wearing. Jackie was in a tight black skirt that stopped mid thigh and a red button down that was tucked in but showed way too much cleavage. She also had her signature red lipstick on and her slick black hair down. In all honesty she looked like she was ready to shoot a porn video as the boss' busty secretary. I had to suppress the urge to roll my eyes as I knew she was doing this to get my attention. For months I've been trying to avoid her, I even convinced my boss to assign a new paralegal to me. She questioned me about it and I told her that due to my stellar reports about her the boss wanted her on more high end cases. Thankfully her work ego is just as big as mine that she bought it. Though that didn't stop her from passing me in the hall, trying to gain my attention. Or trying to get a private meeting with me or blowing up my phone after work hours. It's been getting too much.

"Got any plans for Thanksgiving?" She said sweetly, "I-I'm hosting a sort of Friendsgiving, cause you know if you weren't doing any—"

"Yea, I'm spending it with my daughter." I said cutting her off.

She paused and shifted on her feet beside me, small taps could be heard from her heels hitting the marble floor. "Oh... that's great! Martha let you have her for Thanksgiving?"

"No, we are having Thanksgiving as a family." I said firmly.

"Oh." Her tone almost sounded defeated and I was counting on it. Counting on her finally letting everything go so we could both move on. The ding above sounded and the elevator doors opened signaling me to haul my ass out of here. I made my way in and pressed the button to the lobby. Though, to my dismay she followed me in. "Jonathan, can we please talk." Jackie pleaded, staring up at me. I cursed to myself as I looked up at the numbers and realized how long this ride would be seeing as we were on the 50th floor.

I rolled my eyes, "Jackie come on. We've been through this." I said I leaned against the elevator walls feeling exhausted.

She shook her head furiously, "No, we haven't! You've been avoiding me and making up excuses not to be alone with me. I mean I can't even get a meeting through your assistant anymore. I don't get it, I thought you wanted me. Like I understand things must be difficult but-"

"No Jackie you don't understand because you aren't dealing with the repercussions of your actions. I can't see my daughter when I want, my wife hates my guts, I can't go home." Every time I walked into my sorry excuse of an apartment, I thought about how I used to have a home to go to. A home that had my daughter laughing and my wife dancing in the kitchen.

"You knew all of this was going to happen once you told her about us." She said as a matter of fact.

"No I didn't." I shook my head in defeat.

"How could you have not known we were planning every—"

My voice boomed in the elevator as I lost my patience, "You, you planned everything. From how long it would take me to get divorced to when you wanted to get married and start your own family. When did I tell you I wanted any of that with you?!"

"Jonathan, you never denied it." Jackie's tone was one of trying to see reason.

"I didn't confirm it either. Tell me honestly, did you ever look at my face when you spoke about those things." I gave her an expectant look, "When I first came to you, you knew what this was. You knew what I needed, you knew my situation." It was true, I never hid what I was there for. I just never bothered correcting her when she would start to get her hopes up. If anything I would change the conversation because I knew I didn't see a future with this woman.

"Yea you were in a marriage with a wife who didn't realize that she loved her best friend more than you." My hands curled into fist on the side hearing her words. The pain in my chest was just a bonus to all the crap I was feeling about Martha hating me. "I don't understand, you found someone who would put you first, why can't you see that? I would never be like that B-"

I stepped forward with a glare as I stared down at her, "Be very careful of what you say next."

"Are you kidding me? You want me to be careful about how I talk about her. You're still in love with her?!" Jackie looked at me with disbelief.

"She's my wife!"

"For how much longer, though? Seriously, you want me to be honest. How about you start being honest with yourself? Your wife hates you, her best friend is probably back in the picture right? And you seem like you don't want to admit that you felt anything for me. I mean, how messed up are you, that you cheated on your wife for a year with someone and you won't admit that you love them." To her this all made sense. To her because I kept this going for so long I must have loved her. Though I never did.

I was shaking my head looking up at the lights above. Suddenly Jackie moved beside me and pushed the stop button on the elevator. It halted immediately, jerking us around a bit. Once I found my balance she pinned herself against me. "Tell me you don't feel anything." She purred into my ear, as I shivered underneath her touch. Her hand moved down towards my pants as she rubbed me. I felt myself hardening and was pissed at how my body betrayed me. I didn't want her, but I knew she thought otherwise.

I closed my eyes not wanting to look at her, but that was my first mistake as she started kissing my neck leaving wet kisses. My hands instinctively went to her hips, my grip tightening around her. "Jackie," my voice came out strangled. I didn't want to be turned on by her. All I felt was shame and I had enough guilt to last me a lifetime. In one quick motion I moved her away from me and pushed the stop button to start the elevator up. "Just stop, okay. Stop trying, I'm not gonna change my mind."

"So that's it?" She said in disbelief.

"Yea that's it, what we did was a mistake. You were a mistake." A small gasp left her lips. I knew if I turned I would see her on the verge of tears. When the elevator reached the lobby and the doors opened, I left without looking back.