Everything & More (Book 1 in the E.C.N Series)

Chapter 12-Martha

Work was kicking my ass, I spent the entire day filing, restocking and running around assisting different doctors. I was being pulled in so many different directions I didn't get to have lunch, not that I had an appetite anyways. On top of all that I had been avoiding Lori all day. All she needed to know was that I showed up to work and was actually productive. Though I'm sure that wasn't enough information because she was currently sitting on my front porch with a to-go bag next to her. "What are you doing here? And how did you beat me?"

I had left like 20 minutes before her

"I took the back roads, who wants to sit in traffic."

"Maybe I'm just in the business of torturing myself." I shrugged and pointed at the bag next to her, "What's that?"

"Food, you didn't eat lunch."

"Wasn't hungry." I muttered as I walked past her and to my door.

She stood up, I presumed she had the to-go bag in hand because I heard the crinkling of plastic, "No, no, no. We are not doing that "I don't eat because my husband's an asshat" thing. Hell no. You are not going to jeopardize your figure and become some measly twig because of him."

I groaned and turned around snatching the bag away from her, "Fine." Opening my front door, I stepped in, turned around and stopped Lori from entering, "Thank you for the food but your presence is not welcomed."

Lori put her hands over her chest acting like I wounded her, "Such a bitchy attitude." Lori started backing away, "You're not you when you're hungry." I snorted at her commercial response.

"Yea, yea." I said to her retreating figure as I shut my front door.

~~~~~~

I was able to get through at least half of the food that Lori brought me before I got nauseous. I put the leftovers in the refrigerator deciding I could probably have it later or take it to work with me tomorrow.

Currently I was in my bedroom, examining the mess I had made again. Part of the reason I didn't let Lori in was because I knew if she saw this she would have been livid. It wasn't too long ago that she came and cleaned up for me while she forced me to take a shower. Now, my clothes were scattered everywhere and the dressers with pictures, jewelry and other knickknacks on them were cluttered too.

The chaos that was filling the room was soothing to me. I wanted the chaos to consume me and drown in it. Though that wasn't an option and I knew  my room couldn't stay like this. I mean what does it say to Paige if she saw this; I was letting her know that this kind of behavior was okay.

As I strolled through my bedroom, still in its state, I made my way to the walk-in closet. The entire left side was gone; Jonathan's side. This was what I had to look at every morning when I got ready for work. It was easier to just leave my clothes scattered outside so I never had to look at it again. I huffed and looked around, not knowing where to start. I wanted this closet to be mine, not some shell of a once happy marriage. Slowly I took empty hangers and brought them to my bed. Then I picked up any clean clothes and placed them on the bed too. The dirty clothes went straight to the hamper. After sorting and clearing up my floor, I began placing clothes on their respective hangers. Having about two to three piles I made several trips to the closet. I started spreading out my clothing on each side. I had to admit I loved the way it was starting to look. I didn't realize how much I had when they weren't being bunched up onto one side. Taking some of my shoes I spread them out onto the other side of the shelves as well.

Everything started to feel so spacious. There was a slight warmth being casted throughout my body as I thought about things being okay. I went to move things around my dresser when I saw some tangled jewelry. I knew this would be the toughest part. Tangled necklaces were not easy when they've been lying around having a mind of their own, like earbuds in your pocket. There wasn't enough space to really move so I ended up knocking down one of the jewelry boxes. The moment it hit the floor the latch broke and out came any jewelry inside of it. It littered the floor of tiny earrings and rings.