The Truths Behind the Life of Maeve Sun Lively

11

THE DAY BEFORE VALENTINE'S DAY, the girls were all discussing what they had planned. I was so caught up with my morning and afternoon training with Bridget and the others that I forgot all about valentine's day.

"What?? How do you have nothing planned at all?"

I blinked at her, and I can feel Wang Ya Lan eavesdropping nearby.

"I was too busy, just forgot."

The rest of them looked at me skeptically, and I couldn't tell if it was more disappointment or concern. For some reason, something in me reacted too quickly before I could stop myself. I think it was the panic of knowledge that they might have seen through me. That they could tell I was different. That I wasn't capable of loving.

"Actually I wrote a letter."

This caught their attention immediately, and Wang Ya Lan was so obviously leaning too close to listen.

"Like a love letter?"

I nodded.

"To who?"

I paused, and they looked even more eager as I let the silence hang on. I was trying to think, because who would I have written to if I could love?

Then I said, "雅凯军 (Ya Kai Jun)."

Instantly within a few hours, news traveled fast. By then basically half the school knew I was going to write a love letter to Ya Kai Jun. Or more like, as how rumors always go beyond the original truth, me and Ya Kai Jun had been seeing each other.

During training that day in the afternoon, when we were given a break, I sat down, got a piece of paper and pencil out, and started writing.

Bridget handed me a bottle of water and drained half of hers in three gulps. She sat down next to me, reading as I wrote the words I didn't even care about to some guy.

"Love letter much?"

I looked up at her and something in me felt shaky. I could barely hold my pencil as I stared into her dark eyes and long eyelashes. I think I was prettier than her, but something about her then made me feel like she was the prettiest person in this whole planet.

I pulled myself back to my letter. "Yeah, love letter for valentine's."

She takes a good sip of her water. "Well, this guy sure is lucky."

She got up and turned the music on and started to practice one of our dance choreographies, but break wasn't even over yet. We still had ten more minutes. And I should have used that time to finish the letter, but I couldn't stop staring. Bridget was always trying, she put in all her efforts and time into our training, even more than me I think. And she was the best out of all of us for that reason. I don't think I deserved her now or even then. She was too pure. I loved that about her, but I also, now as I think back, felt bad for her.

The purest ones are always the ones that get ruined by this world.

Her rosy red highlights swung back and forth, she whipped her body one way and I was done for. I couldn't stop watching. Something in me churned and yelled, I have never felt like this before. I didn't know what it was, but I told myself it was friendship. It was how friendship felt.

I put the paper and pencil down, and I got up to dance with her. I was good by then, and I was starting to get better too. I had expression and movement. Not everyone had that. I danced next to Bridget, while Phoebe and Kayla and our dance teacher watched from behind, and I knew we had all their eyes. I've never felt so whole before until that moment, dancing there next to Bridget. She grinned at me at one turning where we overlapped, and it felt like magic. It felt like we could hold the spotlight right there together, just like that. Except that wasn't going to happen or work. Two can be good friends, but both cannot share one spotlight if they were both aiming for the top. I was soon going to realize that.