The Truths Behind the Life of Maeve Sun Lively

15

ADELE AND JOSEPH WERE IN better moods with me, for a few days, I actually thought they loved me. That maybe they could be my parents, parents who love me, the meaning that I can finally have a family. But that was an obvious delusion. And I've learned to not expect love, at least true and pure love, the one Bridget had once given me. I didn't care about it or needed it, those were useless feelings. At least that's what you always tell yourself when you've never truly experienced it.

People in school all started to talk to me again, or more like, they fought their way through to get to me and try to become friends with me. It was like the Ya Kai Jun thing never even happened, people just didn't care. I was just famous. And I kept wondering if that was the feeling of fame. You're so famous that no one cares about what you had done, or maybe they do but they forget about it because they want to get some of that glow, that fame, off of you for themselves. I liked the recognition, and it suddenly just felt like I had the world to myself. I was on the screen, I was on apps, people loved me.

Then why doesn't it feel full?

I was on the screen. That was that. It was what I had wanted, and I was what age then? Sixteen? Seventeen? Who cares, I was famous. But why didn't it feel right?

I was happy, but I wasn't always happy. Life was starting to feel a little looser, Adele and Joseph were treating me better, but none of it felt right. Like I didn't fully fulfill what I had come to do.

And adding on, Bridget had completely shut off. I think I might have started to feel broken just by seeing her. She was great, she was also getting recognition like the other girls. She was the second best, shouldn't that be enough? Shouldn't that be great? But she wasn't great. She looked so...not Bridget.

We were already starting to record another album when Mr. Wang pulled me aside one day.

"I knew the talent I had seen back four years ago, and I was right."

I held in the urge to roll my eyes and laugh my head off, it made me feel so great when he said that. And he kept saying that, he kept praising me. Kept saying "I knew I was right" and even though I knew he's only saying this now because things are flowing. And when things stop going so easily, he'll change. I didn't like to remember that. Why remind yourself of the worst when it's not threatening you?

"People love you, Maeve. They love their '孙雪莉' their 'Maeve Sun Lively'." He was smiling so widely it looked like he might explode.

"Mr. Wang, I've known you for a while now. No need to play around with words, spill it."

He sighs, a happy sigh, a sigh filled with, at the time which I thought was excitement, which now if I think back to was probably greed.

"Mr. Zhong and I have been planning some private concerts and songs for you."

I raised an eyebrow at him, my arms crossed around my chest.

"You're not leaving the group or the girls of course, but people are only recognizing us, they're only recognizing G.W.F. because of you! They want more of you, and if we give them that that'll benefit us. Imagine the amount of tickets we'll sell for live concerts! The money we'd make for your individual songs, for your own music videos!"

It sounded like awe, like wonder. Of course I wanted that. The spotlight, solemnly on me.

"But I can't sing." And I realized I've said that out loud instead of thinking it.

Mr. Wang doesn't look too bothered though. "Who cares! They love you for your face, your body, your looks, who cares if you can't sing? They'll come watch their Maeve Lively anyhow."