Equally Lost (Kyohaba)

Chapter 42

Kyotani's POV:

Why am I here?

Is there a reason that I ended up here? Here, in this beautiful cabin with the most amazing boy ever. Here, in this place that I have to leave so I can return to people that have hurt me. Not to mention get married to someone I don't love. And after meeting my soulmate too...

Did I make a mistake by leaving?

I know I would have never found any of the good things I have now, but I would have been successful. The people I needed to care about me the most would say that they were proud I did the right thing. I would have the life everybody wants to live. So, why did I even leave?

It's late at night, or I suppose really early in the morning. I'm laying on my back, staring into my ceiling. Cream-puff's curled into my side and fast asleep. I'm glad his thoughts don't keep him awake at night.

Speaking of those, I still feel bad about leaving. I feel bad about not wanting to be back in that place. I know I could take the issues that my family threw at me. It's what I'm supposed to be anyways.

I'm the tough guy nobody gets close to. I'm strong enough to hold my own problems and not worry about needing to push them on other people. It's not like there was usually anyone there to tell my problems to. But now there is. I met the live of my life. And he knows everything.

So what have I done? I think I've ruined his life.

A few silent tears drag themselves out of my eyes and slowly move across the surface of my face. They took their time, almost like I wasn't allowed to cry.

I fell asleep with my tear stains still damp and my lover curled into my side.

I wake up, and I'm alone in the bed. Shit, I'm alone in the bed! Shigeru loves sleeping in, so something is very wrong. Did I forget something? No important dates today, and I don't think we had any other plans... Were we supposed to be somewhere early? I don't think so, we only have afternoon practice... I didn't sleep through afternoon practice, right?! Ah, fuck. I guess I'm panicking now.

There's some noise in the other part of the cabin. So, either Shigeru just got kidnapped and I have to fear for my life, or he just woke up early. Knowing my family, either's a possibility.

I jump out of bed. And... trip and fall on the floor because it was a little farther away then expected. It happens sometimes, okay? After getting up off the floor I rush into the kitchen to find Shigeru dancing to music he's playing in his headphones while making pancakes.

I guess I was overreacting. Good. I don't know what I would have done if something happened to him. I might have killed whoever hurt him. I have the power, authority, a good name, I could have gotten away with it. As fun as destroying some rich person's ego sounds, I would rather it not come to that.

Shigeru doesn't know I'm here... I'm going to sneak up on him! I walk behind him and wrap him in a hug. He freaked out and punched me in the throat. I'm now lying on the floor. That hurt!

"Kentaro? Oh fuck, I am so sorry! Darling, are you alright?"

"... yeah. I'm good. Throat hurts though."

"Makes sense. I'm going to grab some painkillers, I'm so sorry."

"It's fine. And don't apologize, people accidentally hit each other all the time. I punched you in the face when we shared that tent over the summer, I guess we're even now."

"Yeah, and you apologized a billion times then."

"True... we woke up Oikawa to get the First Aid stuff. He was kind of mad."