hell or flying | Chaelisa

Chapter 25

A/N: I didn't intend on saying anything so you guys can imagine him however you want but since some of you are thinking crazy things like Michael is her father or something... Michael is Black, guys xD

-

Sunflower :
What are you up to?

Nothing much

Sunflower :
I only have to drop by at work to submit some photos, but I have the rest of the day off
Want to hang out?

A huge grin spread across my face at the question. Truth was, I was hoping she'd ask.

I didn't want to bug Lisa, knowing she had work and how confusing all this must have been for her. Even if she wanted to reconcile, this was not just a situation that she'd need time adjusting to. Probably because this wasn't an ordinary situation one found themselves in often. It had been a little hard for me to process as well, and I might have had an anxiety attack when I came home after the last time we've been together.

As much as I wanted this, it's like I didn't fully grasp what it encompassed. Like I didn't completely understand what kind of position would I not only put myself in but also - and more importantly, Lisa. I couldn't possibly want her to be some kind of secret mistress, a mere affair.

It scared the shit out of me when I realized what all this meant, that Lisa wanted to be a part of my life again. Because as much as I wanted this to happen, now that it has, it all sunk in. It became my reality, and all those things I feared so much in the first place became so much more real.

The fear of Chanyeol finding out that not only was I hanging out with my previous lover but was also intimate with her, would enrage him to a point I wouldn't even dare to think of. Not to mention what he would do if he found out she was his employee all along. It would grant him the chance to ruin her life, as well as her career. He could destroy her completely if he so much as caught whim of what was happening during his absence.

I feared for Lisa, for all the things he could do to her if he found out. He would probably fire her right away and make sure she would never land another job anywhere. Not only that, but he would find creative ways to ruin her life in other aspects as well.

Another thing that scared me beyond belief was the way Lisa's eyes burned with such irrefutable determination when she talked about taking him down; how she would make things right. Sure, a part of me found it incredibly sweet (not that sweet was a word powerful enough for how I felt, but it was the closest I could think of) that even after everything she was still so willing to be my princess in shining armor. That even after knocking her down to her knees, she would still fight so I wouldn't have to.

But it was dangerous. The way her eyes flickered with a spark that would turn into a raging inferno that no one could put out unless they put it out before it could grow out of control. But I knew Lisa, I knew how stubborn she could be, especially when she was fighting for her beliefs. No matter what I told her and how impossible I made it seem (not that I over-exaggerated), she wouldn't be swayed.

That's what scared me the most. I hurt her so much before, and I didn't want her to suffer under my hand any further.

I didn't contact her since we last saw each other. A few days have passed without either of us reaching out, and though I would lie if I said it didn't make me sad, I knew it was for the better. I was hoping she realized it wasn't worth it; that I wasn't.

That's why, not once, did I pick up the phone. I was hoping the realization would sink in. That she would realize how dangerous this game could be. How it was bigger than either of us and how it could destroy her. I was hoping she would come to her senses, loathe me even more than before for dragging her into this mess if that's what it took.