Chapter 3

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(Authors note: thank you sooo much to @moonlight143404 that voted on both of my first chapters! I'm new here, so I don't know what it does, but I'm still really happy! Warning for self depreciating thoughts and self hatred. But if you are reading this angst feast, I'm guessing you're here for this...)

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Bakugou sat on his desk chair, his old laptop open, joining a zoom call for class.

The past week he had been really out of it, when he wasn't running circles in his head or living in a non-existent fantasy world, he was stressing in the real world.

With all his being, he detested the fact that he couldn't bring himself to push forward and excel in school.

Heck! He sometimes couldn't bring himself to do basic things, like fulfill his necessary hygiene routine.

Did he want his teeth to fall out, or his hair to look like a rats nest with all that grease and dirt?

His parents had obviously noticed the odd behavior, and on multiple occasions tried to confront him about it, only for him to brush them off with the infamous,
"I'm fine."

Soon enough, the laptop stopped its lagging and joined the call, which was enough to pull katsuki out of his head for a little.

Pretty quickly, more people joined the call and the teacher began to drone on about algebra or some shit.

He couldn't care less, he was too busy taking flight on a big dragon over towns and remarkable landscapes,in his mind, to pay all that much attention.

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After the majority of the lesson had passed by, bakugou tried to focus on the last few things mr aizawa was saying about the lessons subject.

However, it felt almost as if he wasn't in full control of his mind, and that instead of a functioning brain, cotton candy was stuffed in his skull.

The class was preparing to end the call, as aizawa spoke up,
"Bakugou, please stay on the call. I need to have a word with you."

Aizawa sensei seemed completely nonchalant, but katsuki couldn't help but worry helplessly.

After the last remaining few people left the call, bakugou braced himself for a conversation he did NOT want to have.

"Bakugou,"
Aizawa sounded stern but calm,
"Is there a particular reason for your behavior?"

Bakugou didn't even flinch.

With the most even tone he could manage, he retorted,
"What you on about, teach?"

A small sigh left Aizawa's mouth,
"You know exactly what I'm 'on about'.
I'm talking about your odd behavior in the last month of lock down...
The way your grades are slipping and you never even seem to talk anymore. It's almost as if you aren't even here..."

Bakugou stared hopelessly at the screen with his lips slightly parted and his eyes widened with shock,
"I... I have to go. My mum needs me for chores..."

He left the call shamefully, before aizawa could put in anything else.

Wholeheartedly, he hated lying, but he had been having to do it more and more often...

Anger at himself started to boil under his skin. It didn't quite overflow, luckily, but he felt decently pissed!

He lay his head on the black painted wood of his desk and crossed his arms near the top of his head to block out any light.

He was just so tired, so fucking tired.

With a deep frown he shook away those thoughts, and pushed his chair back to stand up.

His head pounded with the sudden movement, and he felt slightly dizzy, but he couldn't care less!

He angrily stomped over to his bed decked in black covers and threw himself on it, throwing a silent fit.

With the reason being exhaustion, he felt heavier and almost like he couldn't move a limb.

But instead of falling asleep, he drifted of to a completely different place.

His thoughts.

He didn't know how that was even possible, but it felt like he was having a conversation with himself.

Unlike with his classes, he tried to pay attention to the argument his mind was having with itself.
'You're so fucking stupid.
Get out of your head and stop being lazy.
You haven't done many work outs lately... you're probably gaining weight.
Fatty.
Why can't you be perfect like deku? He got all might's attention, even when he was a quirkless loser.
No one wants a fat, stupid, worthless son, student or classmate like you.
No wonder most people don't like you.'

Argument? More like a bakugou slander feast!

He guessed he deserved to be scolded for being fat, stupid and worthless, though.

With a rapidly hardening face, he became determined to get rid of all his flaws and become a better son for his mother, a better classmate and a better student for his teachers!

But he didn't do it in the best way.....
It only did more harm to him....

(826 words)

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