After Rammstein

Hope

As beads of sweat began forming on my forehead I wiped them off and stared at Reesh who still had not answered my question or even looked at me.. I looked out the window when I heard a sigh "I don't want to leave Ivy, but I will.. If it's what you want." I smiled as my heart slowed its hundred miles per hour pace and steadied. "Thank god" I muttered under my breathe not intending on him hearing "you didn't think I would?" I shook my head "you have a lot here.. Friends, family and you're just so... Happy here" that's when it hit me... He's happy HERE! Not in America. "I'm happy wherever you are, Ivy" I smiled my half hearted smile in my sudden realization, I couldn't force him to go.. But I can't stay behind in Germany can I? Of course I could but do I want to? I guess it would be easier for me right? I don't have ties down in America.. Except for mom and dad. That'd suck not seeing them but could I live without them? This isn't how I had planned today would turn out...

He eventually turned to me and grabbed my hand "Ivy, don't overthink this. It's not that big of a deal" umm.. Yeah it is. If I make you go, then I'd just be a bad girlfriend and if I stay well I'd only be dead weight. I mean I can't speak german to save my life.. And I have no skills other than being able to play the guitar... Yeah I'm kinda screwed. But I just nodded and told myself to mentally shut the fuck up, I still have dinner with Reesh and I'm not going to ruin this date too.

We reached a small restaurant that was pretty small but cute looking. I tried to block the previous. Conversation out of my head but it kept clouding my mind, even as we sat down at a table. Finally a waiter came over to take our orders but I couldn't help but feel irked at the fact that she was staring at Reesh the whole time... She got into a deep conversation with him in german... Bitch back off.. He's mine. Mine only. I don't share. I intervened by holding the menu in front of her "I'll have a tea and pasta" Reesh smirked and translated, that douche looks amused.. Why? Because of the way I'm acting? I'm being...jealous. Ugh. The one word I promised myself never to be... I'm turning into the overly attached girlfriend, I'm just scared I'll lose him is all. He doesn't seem to care I mean he's smiling for crying out loud! I exhaled sharply and immediately felt calmer, why am I acting like this all of a sudden? Whatever.

Reesh and I were having a great time! The food was great and the atmosphere had been lifted, it was as if the whole saddening thing never happened. "So... What else do you have planned?" I asked with a huge smile on my fave "well honestly, I have nothing" I laughed "I have an idea" I spoke confident in my words while he raised an eyebrows with a amused face "really?" I nodded "yep" I said popping the 'p' he laughed "I think I know what you mean.. And I'm all for it" he said in between laughs. I did tell him I'd need to stop at a store for protection, wouldn't want to get pregnant now would I? In my mind I played it off as a rhetorical question but I knew deep down I'd wonder, does he want anymore kids? I mean sure he already has one but I'd like to have one... Not now for sure but later... Ehh, I'll discuss it down the road I guess.

After we had dessert we got back into the car "the only store I know that would have them is down the road but it's an.. Uhh... Sex shop" really!? Maybe I could check a few things out while I'm there "ok, that's fine" he looked at me quizzically "you sure?" Im not seventeen anymore I think I can handle a porn store.. Geez "yes, Reesh. I mean what's going to be in there that I haven't already seen?" I sassed back and he just shook his head "you'll see" Hmm.. What's he mean by that? Ehh.. Whatever. We finally pulled into a parking lot "okay you buy the protection and I'm going to look for something, is that ok?" He nodded as we walked in, as he opened the tinted doors for me my mouth went agape and I felt like I couldn't move... For lack of better terms the whole store was horrifying. I began moving again when Reesh pushed me from behind a little. There was genitalia everywhere of both sexes... I began wandering down the isle that looked the least bit 'dirty' but was only met with fuzzy handcuffs and scented lubricants... Oh god. I glanced over at Reesh who was reading a box of condoms. I wanted to tell him how uncomfortable I felt in here but I knew he'd think I was being childish and he'd probably dump me, so I held my tongue for now. I finally noticed the back wall was covered in lingerie... Now that, I'm interested in. I walked over to see tons of cosplay lingerie I mean there was a Harley Quinn one and Batman and Superwoman... Plus nurse outfits.. It was a little overwhelming but in the end I chose a red and black leather corset with matching black lace underwear, it was really cute. I noticed Reesh giving me the 'I'm ready to go' signal so I just waved him on not letting him see what I was planning on buying. He just nodded and went on to pay and leave to wait in the car. I continued looking around until I was tapped on the shoulder "yeah?" I asked when I noticed a short haired blonde girl behind me "do you need help?" She asked in rough English, I just shook my head "your hair is very, very pretty" I smiled and said thanks "may I suggest something?" I nodded not really caring because my stomach had began hurting "I could do your hair to match that outfit with washable dye" I looked at her questioningly "like how?" She smiled and took my hand to a chair behind the register... Now I know I've never been in a 'sex' store before but I'm pretty sure they aren't supposed to do your hair... "Since your hair is brown, you need red underneath like layers" I bit my lip contemplating on letting her but in the end I gave in, it'd match my outfit anyway and it's not like it's permanent right? Haha.

After a while of carefully applying she told me I could look since she was done so I turned to see the underneath of my hair was a darker red color, it was quite exquisite. Almost like an ombré. I bummed a rubber band from her since there wasn't any hair ties and I tied my hair back so it wasn't noticeable, and since its night.. Well there's no way he'll notice. I smiled and thanked her and paid.. She almost talked me into buying a stripper pole but I figured I'd either wreck the hotel room or myself, so I took a raincheck. Back in the car Reesh stared at me with squinted eyes "what was taking you so long?!" I giggled "nothing, I was just chatting with the clerk. She was very nice and helpful" he looked at the bag I held in my hand "whats that?" I shrugged "a little bit of this and that..." He sighed but smiled and we were off to the hotel room. Tonight's going to be fun, no doubt about that.

A/N: dedicated to AsgardianWar-Machine, for the nice comment they left on my last chapter <3 thanks for the kind words and reading! Sorry if this chapter sucks I'm kinda jet lagged but ehh.. I owe my fans another chapter so enjoy! Bye! ;D