One Month Later
Well. Things have certainly... changed. Things were getting better. Taking my meds. Eating somewhat better. And i was feeling happier and less worried and then it just stopped being better. Did i tell anyone? No. I couldn't stop going back to the hate comments i got, re-reading, and realizing maybe they aren't that wrong. I really dont deserve the attention and support im getting. I am looking thicker. My nose is too big. Im too tall and lanky. Im not very attractive.
I rolled over to look at my nightstand clock.
2:28 am.
I heard techno down the hall playing bedwars, and Eret talking to someone on the phone. I had music playing. I layed on my back and let the lyrics swallow me.
"Screaming anything he wants."
"Like look at me look at me look at me look at me..."
"Cause i exist i exist i exist i exist."
A tear slipped down as i mouthed out that last lyric. I just want to exist.
Imposter syndrome. Thats what its called when i dont feel deserving of my accomplishments.
—-
A/N
Shorter chapter ik but the this leads into the next few chapters! Just want to mention a few people who have inspired the next few chapters!
@AllisonMoore3
@Lmanburgwentboom
@gogy_simp18
@Toya_Min
@forshitssakes
@Littl3_Frey4
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Living in misery. (Tommyinnit)
FanfictionTW SelfHarm SuicideMentions EatingDisorder Anxiety PanicAttacks SelfDepreciation Anorexia Tubbo is trans in this but if anyone is uncomfortable by it i can take it out Please read only if you feel you are in a good headspace/can handle these possibl...
