Bad Boys Never Change

Temptations

December 2014

Today is mine and Dutchs 9th Wedding Anniversary. December is always the hardest time for me as it was always our happy month before this, but now spending our anniversary apart and not having him around for Christmas and New year just stings.

I head up to Lompoc on my own this morning  while the kids are at school as I just want to see him on my own, to talk about happy memories and times gone by. I just wish that I could have some one on one time alone not even to have sex but just to hold him, smell him and feel him close to him. I miss him so much, sometimes I feel I cant even breathe.

I get back to the car after my visit and I just break in two I literally sit in the car for about an hour before I can move on again. This just isnt fair.

I have my works Christmas party tonight and I'm looking forward to the distraction and to be able to have a good drink, damn I really need it.

I get home and rest up before Eve comes to collect the kids for the night and even she encourages me to let my hair down and let loose tonight.

Emily helps me get ready by pampering me, doing my nails and curling my hair for me. She knows how down I am and always tries her best to help get me out of my Dutch induced funk.

I put on my long Electric blue dress that has a plunging neckline and she cant stop gushing over how beautiful I look and I just wish that in another time and place I would be wearing this for my anniversary meal not a work party.

Mike offers to drive me over to the conference centre where the party is being held so I can have a drink tonight. The ride is silent for a bit then Mike looks over to me "Hey cuz, you ok over there? Not much of a party person?"

"Yeah I am, and I'm looking forward to letting go for a night, but it's my anniversary and I just miss him so much." I sigh heavily.

"Yeah I get it, and he misses you so much too, seriously you were all he spoke about 24/7 in there. You guys will be fine. Sadly you've just gotta hang in there its shit, but me and Emily are finally back together and enjoying our life now and I never thought that day was going to ever come." He smiles at me sadly.

"I'm glad you two are good Mike you both deserve it." We pull up outside the conference centre and it's so busy that it gives me anxiety.

"Have fun tonight cuz, you look great, get wasted, go wild and if you need a ride back tonight call me later if you need me."

"Thanks alot Mike I love you so much" I say cuddling him and then taking a deep breath i head out into the night and walk into the party.

There is loads of people in there from all over our hospital and a few other businesses are there too. I state my name and the hospital I work at and I am shown to the table where I'm greeted by some of my other work colleagues.

"Wow Dr Dutch, you look beautiful." Luke stands up to give me a kiss on my cheek. He literally looks like a movie star in his dark blue suit and black shirt that's open at the collar, he has designer stubble going on and he has his hair flicked back and I have to tell myself not to stare.

"Ah thank you Dr Danvers you scrub up well yourself, it's crazy everyone looks so amazing." I say looking around the table. We are only used to seeing each other without makeup and in scrubs, looking shattered and stressed out.