In Your Dreams

27.

The night before..

"So what do you want to talk about?" Deacon asked me as we drove through the gates of our subdivision.

"Seeing as how you skipped out on our date tonight I'm guessing you already know." I answered.

"Who told you." He growled, I could see his knuckles turning white as they tightened around the steering wheel. "Was it him?"

I knew who he meant, but it was preposterous so I played stupid. "Who, Mark?"

"No." he muttered.

"I know you can't possibly mean Derek." I scoffed "He's only been in Seattle since right before I was found, and he's only been a friend to me, nothing else. Which is more than I can say for you!"

The car screeched to a halt just as we reached the curb in front of 'our' house. He was getting angry, so angry that I didn't even recognize him anymore. This wasn't Deacon, not my Deacon. And shouldn't I be the one getting angry here? The man practically pissed on my grave and moved on before my blood went cold. Ok, I wasn't really dead but you get the point..

"You need to start explaining NOW." I demanded.

"I thought you were dead ok." He said sounding a little more calm "I only did it because I thought you were dead."

"Did what?" I asked, wanting to hear it out of his lips.

"I cashed the life insurance policy in." he said "That was it."

"No girlfriend?" I arched my brow, a fire burned in his eyes as his lips pressed together. I looked up just then and noticed a petite bleach blonde sitting on the steps to our house, Deacon noticed at the same time and got a look of panic in his eyes. "Right!"

I got out of the car, slapping his hand away as he tried to stop me and slammed the car door on my way across the lawn. She looked up at me through her tears as I approached her, she looked distraught and scared.

"Meredith Grey." I said as I stuck my hand out, to which she just stared at "And you must be my husband's girlfriend."

"Hu...husband?" she stuttered "But he said his wife was..."

"Dead?" I asked "Yeah, long story."

"Marci!" I heard shrieked behind me "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I..I made a mistake, I wanted to see if you would take me back I..." she stopped and glanced at me before glaring at him "Your wife is alive!"

"Very much so." I said.

"Meredith! Get in the house." He demanded. I whirled my head at him and scoffed.

"Excuse me!" I shook my head "Who the hell do you think you are!"

"Your husband!" He growled and shoved me to the steps "Get your ass inside right now!"

I stood my ground, but not for long. His hand came wailing down against my cheek and I felt myself spin through the air before hitting my already swollen cheek against the concrete steps that led up to our home. I gasped and wheezed for air through my shock, I heard a gasp come from the girl and Deacon muttering something at her to go. I quickly picked myself up off the steps as my hands shook with adrenaline and rage and did as he asked... I ignored anything he said as I walked up to the door and unlocked it, then went inside without turning on any lights.

I couldn't believe what had just happened to me, the person I was supposed to trust most in the world had just hurt me like that. One thing was for sure, it would be the last time Deacon Cherrey every laid a hand on me. I heard him still outside arguing with the girl so I went into his office and groped around in the dark, I felt a warm wet trickle run down my cheek and knew it wasn't a tear, I wasn't crying. He must have cut me with his ring or maybe the step did. Either way I found the long metal rod and wrapped me fist around the rubber handle. I stepped back into the foyer just as I heard him coming up the steps. I waited in the shadows as I raged so strongly I could see red.

As soon as his hand shut the door I lifted the golf club over my head and swung with all my might in his direction. He cried out as his body was knocked to the ground and he looked at me in shock. I lifted it over my shoulder again and he braced himself as I swung it into his jaw. He screamed and let out a whimper as he cradled his bruised jaw.

"How dare you!" I screamed as I hit him again, this time in the rib cage "How dare you even THINK you can hurt me after all I've been through!" I hit him again on the other side of the rib cage, now I was just lifting it over my head and swinging it down straight as if I were stabbing him, he started to wail "You will never hurt me! You will never break me!"

By now he was crippled in pain and just struggling to breathe through it. I kicked his legs apart and decided to top it off, his cries got a little louder but I didn't care. I swung the nine iron down and creamed his crotch, he screamed bloody murder and curled into a ball before passing out. I tossed the club aside before smacking my hands together and heading upstairs to pack my stuff.

****

"Meredith." He breathed, I could see the rage and worry fill his eyes, and for some reason it irritated me. I wondered how much he knew, I wondered why he didn't save me from this earlier. I wondered if his feelings for me were genuine and why he hadn't tried harder to make me change my mind. I was angry "What happened."

"What do you think happened." I muttered.

"Did you....fall?" he asked in an optimistic tone. I knew he wasn't buying it.

"Deacon hit me last night." I informed him and watched his jaw tighten "But I took a nine iron to him and kicked his ass to put it lightly."

"Christ." He muttered and shook his head before looking at me with sympathy "Meredith, I'm so sorry."

He started to reach for me but I took a step back. I didn't want to be touched, I didn't want to be comforted, I felt like everyone on the planet was lying or had lied to me. I felt so lost and in the dark to everything. These were my friends, my family, and all I wanted was honesty!

"Meredith?" he questioned.

"I know you want to be there for me." I said "I know that you have feelings for me Derek. And maybe it feels nice, but right now I've just had my ass kicked...again. And I'm about to go file for divorce from a man I've been with for seven years. Not to mention I feel a little betrayed at the moment. So please, save your sympathy and back the hell off!"

I hated saying that to him. He'd been nothing less of a gentleman and I knew he cared, he genuinely cared. But I needed space. I turned just as the look of hurt washed over his face and I marched down the hall to hide in the stairwell and cry. I know I've had worse days, I just didn't expect another one to come so quickly...