Severus Snape Phoenix Freed

Chapter 35 - Sacrifice

Severus raised his wand as he strode towards the gates of Malfoy Manor. He had no intention of waiting for an invitation.  Lucius was sitting alone at the head of the grand table, his head bowed as if he was a broken man. Severus held no pity for him. He had received only what he had deserved, and Severus could not forgive him his weakness. "Where is she?" Severus demanded. Lucius did not raise his head, but turned to look at him slowly, his eyes shadowed. "Is this what you wanted?  Is this what you have foreseen for your wife and son?" Severus spat. "I don't know," Lucius replied, putting his head in his hands. Narcissa entered the room, looking at Severus, her own eyes shadowed. "What would you have us do, Severus?" she said. "My only concern is for my son. Whatever we need to do, we will," she pleaded, looking at Lucius and then back to Severus as if she could no longer trust her own husband to act on his own. "Go to Voldemort, Lucius. Implore him to seek the boy alone and spare the lives of those at Hogwarts. How many more must die because of  one man's desire to live forever? Every living thing must die, and even your own fear has driven you to risk the souls of those you love," Severus said, hoping Lucius had some sense of courage left in him to protect his own family. Narcissa moved towards Lucius and placed her hand on his shoulder, "It is the only thing I ask from you, Lucius. He is our son."  Lucius nodded, and rose to look at Narcissa. "He is our son," he said as he touched her cheek with his fingers. "You will find her in the servant's room, Severus. I'm sorry," Lucius said, and left as if walking to face his own sad fate. 

Severus followed Narcissa to the servant's room. She used her wand to remove the protective spells. She was silent, as if her shame from her own complicity was too much to bear. Severus found Phoenix in a bloody heap on the floor. He drew his wand, chanting healing spells to relieve her of her wounds. He worried about the wounds he could not see, as Voldemort was known to torture his victims' minds more so than their bodies. Perhaps she had paid the price with her body because of her mind's inability to be violated. He knelt over her, working to heal wounds, not allowing his mind to imagine their cause, or the pain she must have endured with them. He felt moisture on his hand, realizing it was his own tears, and he did not have the will or desire to hold them back.  She moaned in pain, and he worked feverishly to remove as much of her pain as he could before she regained consciousness.  When she  opened her eyes to look at him, he felt a twinge of pain in his own gut as he saw the pain her eyes.  He saw her lips trying to form words, and she winced. "Be still, it's alright," Severus said gently as he moved to heal her lips, which were swollen and split, and then her cheek, which was split over bone. When he was finished, he used the aguamenti spell to make water in his hand, and held her head to drink, then wiped her lips with his fingers to moisten them. "I'm sorry Severus," she whispered. "My Phoenix, it's alright, I understand," he said as he stroked her hair. At that moment, Lucius barged into the room, "Severus, the Dark lord sent me to find you. He said you must go to him."  "No Severus, please," Phoenix said desperately.  "Now I must ask for your understanding, Phoenix, and your forgiveness," Severus said as he kissed her gently on her lips. He stood to leave, not wanting to risk changing his mind to stay where his heart begged him to.  "Take care of her," he told Narcissa. "I will, Severus," she said, and she met his eyes with tears in them. 

He met the Dark lord in the boathouse. He could not let his courage fail him now. He told Voldemort that the Elder Wand answered to him only, knowing the Dark lord suspected the lie for what it was. The Dark lord stared into his eyes, trying to find the truth, which Severus knew he must not reveal. Only when the Dark lord spoke of Dumbledore's death at Severus's hand did Severus realize that the Dark lord did not plan on allowing him to live. He was still surprised when Voldemort struck him with the killing curse, as he was not yet prepared to die. He had not fulfilled his last promise to Dumbledore, to tell the boy that he must die at Voldemort's hand in order to defeat him. He fell, knowing he was dying, and yet the Dark lord ordered Nagini to attack him to ensure there was no chance at life for him. Nagini struck him again and again, and he did not cry out, refusing to give the Dark lord the pleasure of hearing his pain. He would die alone, as was surely his fate. He thought of Phoenix, and was comforted that he would not die unloved. When Harry Potter came to him, his hope that he could fulfill his promise to Albus was renewed. He gave Potter the magical tears of his memories that would also reveal his true self to him, and he felt his spirit eased with that knowledge. He asked the boy to look at him, wanting to see Lily's eyes in his once more... a reminder of what he had made his sacrifices for. It was worth it, he told himself, all of his sacrifices weren't in vain, and yet he regretted that the only thing left of Lily must die. He felt regret for Phoenix as well, not for loving her, but for not living for her.