1991

1991 Part 10

Eddie picks my jeans up from where I kicked them off on the floor and hands them to me.

"Thanks" I say quietly, suddenly feeling self-conscious. It's as though now we've got the unbearable tension out of our systems we're not sure how to act. I pull my jeans on quickly and look for my bra and t-shirt.

"Here" he says and retrieves them from behind the faucet. He's still completely naked, shyly tucking his hair behind his ear and staring at me. This guy is a walking contradiction, how is it possible to be shy while standing fearlessly nude and godlike? I tear my eyes away with difficulty, embarrassingly an all too familiar ache already threatens to resurface and I'm not sure how he'd feel about round two so soon.

"Your shorts are over by the door I think," I offer. Eddie seems to snap out of whatever daze he was in and grabs his things.

"Oh, right, thanks." We get dressed in silence.

"Do you need a minute....?" He's standing with his hand on the doorknob. I nod. He gives me a final smile and slips out.

"Give her a minute," I hear him say to whomever was outside banging on the door.

"Dude! Nice work!" a guy replies. We obviously weren't as discreet as we thought. Oh well I sigh, can't do anything about that now.

I check my reflection in the mirror. Rather than just looking like I've been fucked sideways, I actually have been fucked sideways. I giggle but the reality is less picturesque than the ideal. My bee stung lips are now Eddie stung, swollen and used looking. We've just had sex in this bathroom, I think to myself and I can't stop smiling. I just had sex with a perfect, perfect guy who, undoubtably is drop dead gorgeous, and I hardly know him. I'm such a seductress I smile to myself. I've never done that before, never that quickly. 

I'm wiping smudged mascara from under my eyes when a question pops into my head. What's his last name? I don't even know. And that's when it hits me. Horror creeps over me as I realise I don't even know his last name and he doesn't know mine, he never asked me. In fact, he never asked me anything about myself. And he's walked out after sex and left me. Nick was evidence of how utterly useless I am when it comes to judging character and I've just done it again. I've let a virtual stranger fuck me in a bathroom at a party, all because he is beautiful. I am an idiot, not only that but a cheap, tacky idiot too. My heart sinks, he's going to blank me completely, I just know it. I'll go out there and not be able to find him, probably never even see him again, either that or he'll be off with some other vacuous idiot like me. My nose starts running and I sniff. I realise I'm tearing up a little. I grab a tissue and dab my face. He's left me with a hickey, something I've not experienced since Steven Mitchell perfected his vacuum technique on my neck in middle school. Although I must admit this one's much prettier, it will only serve as a reminder of my stupidity. I've been branded as an easy lay. Shit. What have I done? Too late now I think, you stupid girl, so easily flattered by a man who despite the shy act clearly knows exactly what he's doing and the effect he has on women like me. How naïve can I get, it's the oldest trick in the book. Fuck, I panic, I don't want to go out there and look that desperate. It's obvious lots of people heard us, they'll all watch the pathetic conquest come out and look around like a lost puppy, wondering why she's been abandoned. I start crying for real.

After five minutes of self-pity I give myself a shake. That guys knocking on the door again, poor things been holding it in for fifteen minutes at least. I can't avoid it any longer it's time to face the music. I hatch a plan to save face, I'll walk out quickly and keep my head down to just go straight back out the door we came in. There are so many people around no one will notice me. I didn't see Kirst though, which is a problem. She'll worry, that is if Eddie even bothers to tell her I came. It's no good I'll have to find K first and let her know that I'm going. I'll say I've got a headache. It can't be that far home from here, except fuck! I don't know where we are. I'll ask K, she'll know and then we can call a cab and in less than half an hour I'll be home.