Kevin holds my hair back as I wretch all over the side of the highway. It's the third time we've pulled over. My eyes are watering, no doubt there's mascara running down my face. Still bent over I take a deep shuddering breath and immediately start crying again.
"Hey, come on Sam," Kev rubs my back, "let's just get home, get you to bed."
"If she's gonna throw up in the back you be best not gettin' back in," the driver calls from his window.
"Sorry sir, I promise, she won't," Kev calls.
"She'd better not!"
---------------------------------------------
At home Kev puts me to bed and pulls the covers up to my chin. They smell of Eddie, of us together. The takeout cartons from earlier are still at the foot of the bed. I gulp and give a heaving sob. Kev waits patiently for me to exhaust myself crying.
"Did...did you know?" I plead, looking desperately at Kev. He pauses and gives a big sigh.
"No Sam, I swear, I didn't know," he says and brushes my hair from my face, "you're like my kid sister, you think I'd let him within a mile of you if I thought for one second he....he was...." Kev looks away.
"He was what Kev? What? What did you see?" I sob. Kev hands me a kleenex and I blow my nose loudly.
"Nothing...really, here drink some water," Kev hands me the glass he filled and put by the bed.
"I don't want any fucking water I want to know!" I cry, pushing his hand away and spilling the drink. Kev sighs loudly again.
"Don't make me do this Sam, it won't help, you'll only feel worse." So he did see something, my stomach lurches again, fortunately its empty.
"Please Kev...I need to know, please." I beg. Kev looks at me sadly.
"They left, together, a couple of minutes after Mike took you into that back room," Kev stops and looks at me with concern. I swallow.
"And..?"
"And nothing, I didn't follow them Sam."
"Together?"
"He...he was holding her hand...." Kev says quietly.
"He was?"
"I'm sorry Sam, I'm so sorry."
I bury my head in my pillow, my pillow which smells of him, his gorgeous scent that fills my nostrils and makes my stomach ache. I cry out and throw it across the room.
"I don't get it!" I scream, "why fucking take me there in the first place?"
"I'm guessing he didn't expect her to show up tonight?" Kev shrugs.
"That fucking asshole," I yell, my face down on the mattress, "I can't believe I'm this fucking stupid" I heave.
"You're not stupid babe, you're not," Kev rubs my back trying to calm me down, "he's the stupid one, shit I still can't believe it really. He seems like such a good guy."
"Yeah, just like his fucking friends right?" I spit bitterly, "fucking asshole friends got his back, making sure I'm out of the way so he can get out with that bitch." I start to cry again, heartbroken all over again at the thought of Jeff and Mike betraying me like this. I'd liked them so much. And Chris had fucking brought her with him, that bastard.
"Yeah well, you never know Sam," Kev says and I'm immediately irritated.
"What the fuck does that mean?"
"Just...you should maybe give them a chance to explain their side..." Kev says softly.
"Are you fucking serious? Explain what exactly? How they covered for their shitty friend? How they treated me like dirt?" I'm furious and yelling at the top of my lungs.
"Woah...woah there Sam, I didn't mean..." Kev says trying to calm me down.
"I know what you meant" I hiss and turn my back on him, "just get the fuck out of my room Kev."
"Hey listen for one minute, you don't..."
"GET THE FUCK OUT!"
----------------------------------------------------
I hear banging, then it stops, then starts again. I open my eyes, it's dark, pitch black. I close my eyes again and the banging stops.
I open my eyes, it's light. I feel hot, too hot. I look down and see that i've got my clothes on under the blankets. I throw the covers off enjoying the cold air. I pull my sweater over my head and my jeans down then wrap myself back up in the blankets. I smell Eddie, I reach for him under the blanket but there's no one there. My heart aches. I close my eyes and drift back to sleep.
----------------------------------------------------
"Sam..Sam?"
"Eddie?"
"No I'm sorry sweetheart, it's me...I made you coffee." I open my eyes to see Kev is sitting on the edge of my bed with a steaming mug in his hands.
"What time is it?"
"A little after 8."
I shuffle up to a sitting position and take the mug gratefully. I nurse it in my hands enjoying the comforting heat.
"How do you feel?" Kev asks kindly.
"I'm ok," I lie. I'm not ok. My heart has been ripped from my chest and stomped on by a large pair of beaten up docs.
"Sorry about last night," Kev says quietly. I shrug.
"At least I only knew him a couple of days right? Thank god it wasn't longer, lucky escape," I try to chuckle, my pathetic attempt at humour.
"I saw you together Sam..." Kev says meaningfully, "don't try to bullshit me, it doesn't matter if it was two days or two years"
I blink at him and sip my coffee to avoid the tears coming again. Kev's right. It may have only been a couple of days but I've never felt like this before. In a way it was a lucky escape because if I'd fallen any further for Eddie last night would have literally killed me. Instead I'm only critically wounded. I breathe a shuddering sigh.
"Fuck, Kev, I really liked him," I whisper as the tears splash down my cheeks.
"I think maybe more than that Sam," Kev's soothing tone tips me over the edge and I grab him to me, burying my face in his chest to howl. Kev waits for the sobs to subside.
"He was here," Kev says finally.
My heart stops.
"What?" I blink at him.
"Eddie, was here, last night. I'm surprised you didn't hear him the amount of banging he did on the door."
"Wha..what did he say?" I ask quietly
"I didn't speak to him, told him to go home and that you'd speak to him today if you wanted to. Took almost an hour to get him to leave, he just kept hammering on the door."
"I don't want to speak to him," I mutter.
"The neighbours threatened to call the fucking police before he left."
"Good."
"Sam, don't you think you should at least hear him out?" Kev asks.
"No Kev, I don't." I say firmly. Kev looks at me with concern then concedes.
"Fine, but if he turns up again don't blame me if Marge calls the cops."
YOU ARE READING
1991
FanfictionA completely fictitious, made-up story set in an authentic version of 1991, where 21 year old student Sam is awakened by Eddie. Full of smut, band/singer references, authentic details, peak era Eddie and a reasonably ok, legible storyline, I hope. E...
