Once Again: Nanami x OC

Chapter 27: times i'd rather forget

| hey so this is gonna be another saeko flashback just to give more insight on her life with her mom.

i do want to put a serious TW because i will be mentioning sexual assault and because her mom was emotionally and verbally abusive towards her in this chapter. it was mainly stuff about how she didn't love saeko and that she never wanted to be a mom and really just projection. also the sexual assault part is a little graphic and if u have narcissistic parents or attempted or just sexual assault is a sensitive subject, u might be triggered by this just chapter. totally okay to skip this one!

again, i want to make it clear that i am NOT romanticizing or glorifying child abuse, verbal/emotional abuse, sexual assault, and/or narcissistic behavior. i'm using saeko as a character as a symbol to look into the perspectives of those who have been affected by these things.

everything that i do with saeko's character relates to my ideas on the male gaze, internalized misogyny, and ending the cycle of abuse and her backstory represents a lot of these things.

that aside please enjoy this chapter, unless something in it is triggering. if that's the case, it's totally okay to skip this one! :) |

"are you sure you can't think of anything else?", a man asked.

saeko looked up at the man in front of her, he was her guidance counselor. a small man in his mid-40s with a balding head and wireframe glasses. saeko had tried her best to avoid seeing him since it was time for seniors to update their future plans once they graduated high school. the only problem was that she didn't have a plan once she graduated high school. she had no real-life goals or long-term plans ahead of her, just continuing to work at the convenience store around the corner from her house.

she fidgeted with her fingers, "no...not really", she said quietly. she was still embarrassed that her counselor had tracked her down even after all her efforts to avoid him.

the man sighed and put the piece of paper on his desk, "do you have any plans on going to university? maybe being a businesswoman?", he asked.

saeko looked back down at her hands, "no, i plan on just continuing to work at the convenience store"

"for how long?", he asked, tilting his head.

"i don't know...just until i find something that pays better?", she mumbled. "may i please go home now?", she asked as she felt her hands start to shake a bit.

the man hesitated before answering, "...yes, you may", he sighed.

saeko got up and grabbed her school bag, "thank you mr. yamamoto, have a nice day", she said as she bowed to him, practically itching to leave the teacher's lounge.

"you too miss kobayashi, get home safe", he said as she walked out of the teacher's lounge and into the hall. she sped walk through the hall and down the stairs to the shoe lockers, fumbling to get her sneakers on and shoving her school shoes in the locker before she headed out the door.

a few hours had passed and she was working in the convenience store, re-stocking some of the shelves with snacks. she looked down at her employee shirt, thinking about what she could possibly do besides working at a convenience store.

now that i think about it, i don't really have any plans...or anything i want to do in the future

she looked at the clock, 7:26 pm, it was almost time for her shift to end. she picked up the cardboard box and carried it back into the stock room and set it down on one of the shelves before walking back out towards the register. a dark-haired businessman in a dark suit had walked in and was walking up and down the isles.