orders || levi x oc

nine.

One day before.

The day went on like usual, but thankfully less busy. Cleaning, a little training, and kitchen duty. Sasha and Jean were on the watch post, as Mikasa, Conny, Historia and I were in the kitchen preparing the meal for supper.

Mikasa was mixing up a salad of greens, Historia watching over the bubbling pot of water, and Conny and I who were peeling potatoes for the soup.

We all stopped when Mikasa brought our attention over to the doorway.

"Eren! You should still be in bed!" she said sternly to the figure in the doorway who had just entered the kitchen area.

"I'm fine. I already slept for the whole day." he made his way over next to Conny and I, picking up a potato to begin peeling. "Besides, it's my fault the strategy for retaking Wall Maria got shelved." he mumbled under his breath.

My eye twitched at Eren's attitude. I hated that he always blamed himself for not being able to control his ability as perfectly as we could say. He was doing his best, and to me... that's all that mattered.

"It's not your fault. So don't worry about it." Mikasa reassured him as I glanced to my right to see a pitiful looking Eren.

"All I care about... is getting a chance to fight that Beast Titan. Whatever that damn ape is, I'll never forgive it." Conny seethed beside me, his hands beginning to tremble.

This was only natural. Conny had a reason to hate the Beast Titan. That creature destroyed his hometown, and to our knowledge turned his mother into a Titan for a reason we could only theorize.

Conny shook his head lightly before changing the subject, "It's about time to switch lookouts. Mikasa?"

Conny and Mikasa headed out of the kitchen to change watch with Sasha and Jean, leaving only Eren, Historia, and I tending to the meal.

"Must be nice." I heard the small blonde voice lowly from behind. "You two and the others... you have goals in mind, even though they won't be easy. But me, with Ymir gone, I don't even know what I want."

"Don't you want to save Ymir though?" Eren asked.

Historia only sighed, "Yeah, but back then, I couldn't believe what she did... though it's true I wanted to save her. But now, I'm thinking differently. Ymir chose her own path in life. I have no right to change that... and no need to."

Eren let out a small chuckle, "Finally, you're talking again."

I smiled too, over at the sorrowful looking girl who was usually the complete opposite. Over these past few weeks, I did notice that Historia's usual bubbly personality had begun to fade. She never really spoke about what was going through her head, mostly keeping to herself and displaying that she was fine.

"When we came here you told us all about yourself... but since then you rarely talk." Eren admitted.

"Because it's a pain. Sorry, that good-girl Christa, who was nice to everyone is gone now." Historia said sharply.

"No, I think it's better this way." Eren said in response to Historia who looked utterly confused.

"Before, it felt like you always put on a facade. It was so forced and unnatural, it made me sick." Eren said bluntly before flashing a toothy smile. "But, the you right now is pretty normal. A stupidly honest, but normal girl. Anyways, you have plenty of time to think about Ymir. In a lot of ways, I—" Eren stopped short as I had a chance to speak in his sudden silence.

"Historia..." I went over to her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Change is difficult, and it may seem exhausting at times. Feeling lost... it does have an ending. It'll come with time."